ow Page 827 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Jets Are Currently Getting De-Pantsed By the 49ers; Is It Time For Something New?

The Jets offense is dead. The roster is lousy with the crippled and infirm. The faith of supports wanes or disappears completely with each incompletion. It is seriously raining hail in New York right now....

ESPN Repeatedly Identifies Random Man As Former NFL Running Back Fred Taylor

Former Florida and Jaguars great Fred Taylor has a son, Kelvin, who like dad plays running back and is committed to play for the Gators. Kelvin's Glades Day squad made the trip up to Yulee for a battle of Florida high school heavyweights, and the ESPN broadcast focused mostly on Fred Taylor, who w...

Rick Reilly Fell Asleep At The Ryder Cup

As tweeted out by Sports Illustrated writer Alan Shipnuck. Shhh, Alan! He's working!...

Ryan Howard Broke His Toe By Dropping His Warm-Up Bat On It In The On-Deck Circle

The Phillies have had a pretty miserable year, but it hasn't been outlandishly miserable. In their division, the Mets have more histrionic fans and suffered a worse collapse. In their state, the Pirates had a historically sad season that culminated in getting blanked last night by Homer Bailey. But ...

Here's ESPN Sideline Reporter Lewis Johnson Interviewing A Statue Of A Pig

Only the latest entry in the recent tradition of sideline reporters "interviewing" animals or objects that, because they are not possessed of human intelligence, cannot respond to any questions. Background: that's a statue, and Lewis Johnson is a person, and he asks it questions, and it remains co...

Either Mark May Or Lou Holtz Burped Loudly On ESPN's College Football Halftime Show

Caught off guard when they threw it back to the studio during ESPN's halftime report, somebody burped loudly and directly into their microphone. We're thinking it probably wasn't Rece Davis, because he was getting ready to talk and seems to transition pretty well. So it could either be Mark May or ...

This Week's Sign Of The Apocalypse

For nearly two decades now, Sports Illustrated has stirred the tea leaves to discern a weekly Sign of the Apocalypse. Deadspin salutes the magazine's ongoing effort to head off the end of times, but declines to quietly cede to SI the scoop on the biggest event in world history....

Desmond Howard Talked About "Beaver Juice" This Morning On <em>College GameDay</em>

Please do not discuss beaver juice. Anywhere. Desmond Howard elected to do exactly that this morning, and here's what happens. (Also, remix!)...

Warren Sapp Called Brandon Marshall A "Retard," So Marshall Filmed Two Video Responses, Sideways, While Driving

On his radio show last week, Dan Patrick baited Warren Sapp into saying some dumb stuff about "kids these days"—how about Cam Newton celebrating a touchdown when his team is losing?! What a glory boy!—and Sapp took the bait, hook, line and sinker: not only did he incomprehensibly declare, "These kid...

How To Make Chili: A Guide For People Who Aren't Anti-Bean Zealots Or Elitist Scum

It's weird that we fight about chili. ...

A Grieving Rex Ryan Believes That If The Jets Make The Super Bowl, Darrelle Revis's Knee Could Be Ready

Which stage of grief is denial? Right, that's Stage 1. On Monday, when a really, really sad Rex Ryan announced that Darrelle Revis had indeed torn his ACL, the Jets coach said he wanted to talk to his star cornerback before putting him on season-ending injured reserve....

"Virgil, Getting Ready To Perhaps Become The Next WWF Champion": Virgil's First And Only Title Shot

Reader Nav (who sent in the Canadian customs story in this Virgilbag) has found something remarkable in the dustbin of wrestling history. Back on the Nov. 21, 1992, edition of WWF Superstars, everyone's favorite lonely wrestler got a shot at immortality. Nav explains:...

Falcons Safety Thomas DeCoud Played The Meow Game During An Interview On <em>SportsCenter</em>

Super Troopers has long been a cultural touchstone for shaggy-haired college dudes who like to watch movies when they're stoned. Spend enough time in any dormitory, and you're bound to hear someone yell, "He's already pulled over, he can't pull over any farther!" and then laugh before taking anot...

How The Referee Deal Got Done

Judy Battista of The New York Times has the most complete rundown of the negotiations that got the referees back on the field last night, and it becomes clear that the Packers-Seahawks debacle didn't get the deal done, but it did get it done faster....

Browns Center Alex Mack Has Blood On His Ass [UPDATE]

The Browns are, so far, managing not to embarrass themselves—Cleveland's within a touchdown of the Ravens in Baltimore as of this writing. More serious injuries notwithstanding, we are concerned about the health of Browns center Alex Mack, who appears to be bleeding from a place you really do not w...

Somehow Josh Cribbs Woke Up And Walked Away From This Brutal Head-Crunching Hit

On a day the NFL celebrated the end of its most pressing controversy, its lingering one rose again to prominence as Browns returner Josh Cribbs took a brutal hit from Dannell Ellerbe at the end of a first quarter punt return and lay motionless on the turf during tonight's Cleveland-Baltimore game ...

Cheerleaders, Endless Chants, And Fan-Created Performance Art: Why Baseball Games In The Far East Feel Like College Football Games

On my flight to Busan, South Korea I sat next to an older Korean woman sporting a Detroit Tiger hat. It seemed serendipitous that I'd be seated next to a fellow Tigers fan on a vacation planned entirely around seeing baseball games. The issue, which was a big issue, was expressing this....

ESPN Spoils Its Own Demetrius Jackson Announcement (He's Going To Notre Dame), Then Pulls Spoiler Video [UPDATE]

Well, ESPN's Dave Telep had quite a scoop earlier today. A video by Telep was posted to ESPN about an hour ago that reported big time basketball recruit and point guard Demetrius Jackson was heading to Notre Dame. The video was titled "Telep: Jackson's Impact on Notre Dame." For folks following this...

Kellen Winslow asked for his release from the Patriots today. The team granted his request and honorably discharged him....

A's Pitcher Dallas Braden Goes A Little Crazypants At A Community Meeting In His Hometown

A public meeting was held in Stockton, Calif., last night in order to address the town's high crime rate. That's not something that would normally register on our radar, but when Dallas Braden decides to show up at that meeting with a baseball bat and berate the police chief until he gets himself k...