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Tony La Russa Appeared On A Game Show Roughly 30 Years Ago, And Nobody Knew Who He Was
Your morning roundup for Oct. 21, the day we learned lighting poop on fire won't turn it into gold. H/T to Bryan J. for the video. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Here's Video Of A "Streaker" Leading To A Bench-Clearing Brawl In Tonight's UCLA/Arizona Game
"The horrid football displayed by UCLA was only topped by a bizarre end to the second quarter that featured a streaking fan (sort of) and a bench-clearing brawl. Details of the streaker - really for a lack of a better word - are fuzzy, but it appears a fan ran on to the field dressed as a referee,...

Watch Stephen A. Smith And Terrell Owens Struggle To Define The Word "Soon"
Tipster Stephen N. just sent in this compelling sliver of an interview between two noble men. So, thanks for that....

There Was A Perfectly Placed Own Goal In Celtic's Europa League Match Today
"Around the half-hour a long punt by the home goalkeeper, Benoît Costil, was making its way harmlessly through to Fraser Forster in Celtic's goal but Cha Du-ri helped it on then watched in horror as the ball slipped past his goalkeeper and into the net. The South Korean was playing in midfield and...

Let This Serve As Proof That All Basketbrawls In China Don't Involve Georgetown
"Towards the end of a closely fought exhibition game, the CBA's Foshan Dralions got into a bench-clearing brawl last night with Australia's Melbourne Tigers, after a player from the Aussie team (in maroon) gave a tentative love-tap to a Foshan player (in white)." [Shanghaiist] (The action starts a...

Idiot Utah Sports Columnist More Or Less Calls Amar'e Stoudemire A Dumb Negro
Doug Robinson, the resident paste-eating troglodyte at the Deseret News, has gone and written a truly remarkable column this week....

Presenting Your Ryan Howard At A Food Store In A Motorized Scooter Photoshop Roundup
The above photo is of Ryan Howard, and it was taken at a suburban Philly Whole Foods on the day after the Phillies were knocked out of the National League playoffs by the Cardinals. The game ended with Howard recording the final out and tearing his Achilles in the process, which explains the scoote...

This Asian Champions League Semifinal Match Turned Sour After A Guy Got Kicked In The Head
At the onset of this video from Al Sadd's 2-0 win over the Suwon Samsung Bluewings, Choi Sung-hwan of the latter's head gets jacked up. Before trainers can even finish wrapping Choi's dome, Al Sadd scores a goal (at the 1:18 mark). From there, the discord ranges from yappy to shovey until roughly ...

Homemade Infographic: Is The World Series Famous Enough For Dirk Nowitzki?
Maybe Major League Baseball is preventing Dirk Nozitzki from throwing out the first pitch for the Texas Rangers for some reason other than as a courtesy to NBA owners, an intersport extension of the basketball lockout. Maybe it really is that as they weighed "what makes sense for the team and a good...

MLB's Fun Police Bans Dirk Nowitzki From Throwing Out First Pitch At A World Series Game
From Marc Stein: "Sources told ESPNDallas.com that—with the NBA in the midst of a lockout that has spanned 111 days—at least some hesitation stems from the idea that MLB executives want to stand behind their basketball counterparts and have notified the Rangers that they can't bestow first-pitch hon...

Happy Halloween! Meet The Human Centipede Pumpkin
We here at Deadspin are great fans of the Human Centipede series of films—the second of which hit theaters a week and a half ago. And we're also great fans of Halloween, or something. So when some reader—in this case Adam K., of lovely Wrightsville Beach, NC—sends us a Human Centipede-carved pumpkin...

Michael Crabtree Says He Missed A Flight Because He Got Pulled Over By A Cop Who's A Raiders Fan
Crabtree, a 49ers wide receiver, first tweeted this: "Just got pull over on highway 280 on my way to the airport. Police kept me for 30 mins....." He followed that with what you see above. No word on why Crabtree was pulled over, in what municipality the traffic stop took place, or why Raiders fans ...

SprtsCntr: Herm Edwards Says Many Emphatic Things About Quarterbacks
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Progress! Rick Reilly Is Now Ripping Off Writers Who Are Not Rick Reilly
"The Heart Of Football Beats In Aliquippa," by S.L. Price, Sports Illustrated, Jan. 31, 2011. "Aliquippa's Silver Lining," by Rick Reilly, ESPN.com, Oct. 17, 2011....

A Reminder That Sports Journalism Could Be Much Worse
"Anaheim Angels all-star Howie Kendrick refused to sign a baseball card for an eight-year-old boy and made him cry, RadarOnline.com has exclusively learned."[Radar]...

A.J. Hawk's Middle Finger To His Sideline Was An Inside Joke That No Other Packer Knows Anything About
After Packers linebacker AJ Hawk flipped off his own sideline in Sunday's game against the Rams, he said it was a running joke with a couple of his teammates. Thing is, none of his teammates has come forward to admit any familiarity with this running joke....

A List Of Places Where Brett Favre Is Also Not Going, Yet
There is a special moment in the news cycle during which outlets report on things that are not happening, but that maybe could happen, but that also could not not happen because it would be so interesting if they did happen. Do you follow?...

Ozzie Guillen Will Appear On <em>Baseball Tonight</em> Throughout The World Series
It dawns on me that we could play a game with two tentpoles of recent Chicago White Sox squads. We'll call the game "Guillen OR Pierzynski." Said the White Sox drink rally beer during games to get themselves going? (Pierzynski.) Went on a profane tirade after the White Sox lost to Bruce fucking Chen...

Christian Ponder Came Out To Play Last Night, And So Did The "Ponder" Puns
Throughout the first three quarters of the Bears-Vikings game last night, Al Michaels and Cris Collinsworth mentioned Christian Ponder, as well as "ponder" puns, as many times as they possibly could....

The Stats May Or May Not Show That Dez Bryant Played His Ass Off, But This Photo Does
Your morning roundup for Oct. 17, the day the headline "Used Condom-Collecting Women Charged In Alleged Sex Attack Spree" caught our attention. H/T to Adam for the Dez Bryant photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....