owl Page 174 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Iowa Senator Introduces Just The Whiniest Bill About The Stanford Band
The notoriously “edgy” Stanford marching band performed a skit full of dumb hick stereotypes during halftime of Stanford’s 45-16 thwacking of Iowa in the Rose Bowl. Despite the fact that the skit wasn’t particularly good, funny, or unexpected, everybody lost their goddamn minds. Iowa fans got mad, R...
Reports: Broncos Safety Ryan Murphy Questioned In Prostitution Sting, Brother Cited
Broncos practice squad safety Ryan Murphy was questioned as part of a prostitution sting on Tuesday, according to multiple reports. CBS San Francisco reports that the sting took place in northern San Jose, about a 10 minute drive from the 49ers’ stadium, the site of Super Bowl 50 on Sunday. While Mu...
The NFL Is Screwing The World Out Of Watching The Only Known Copy Of Super Bowl I
In January the NFL Network broadcast the first ever replay of Super Bowl I, contested 49 years ago between the NFL’s Green Bay Packers and AFL’s Kansas City Chiefs. But as the league’s press release notes, it wasn’t a replay of the original broadcast. Instead, they located “all 145 plays from Super ...
Oh Crap, It's Time To Draft Your Fantasy Puppy Bowl Team
What a time to be alive. You can now draft your three-dog side for this Sunday’s Puppy Bowl. Choose from all the competitors listed here, and I’m going to kick your ass because my team is the best....
Wade Phillips Is Drippin'
While Broncos defensive coordinator Wade Phillips fielded questions at the Super Bowl’s media row Monday, but he got some help with his appearance from cornerback Aqib Talib....
San Francisco Still Doesn't Know How It's Going To Pay For Hosting Super Bowl Week
Reporters were guided by police escort from San Francisco down to the media center in San Jose yesterday and, according to the San Jose Mercury-News the escorts will continue during the week. While the reporters tweeted about how awesome their escorts were (yes, really, they did), it got me wonderin...
Hell Yeah Buddy, It's Time For More Bad NFL Lip Reading
The only good thing to come out of the week leading up to the Super Bowl so far is the latest installment of NFL players being subjected to very bad lip-reading voiceovers. ...
Nommy Graminated?
Buper Spowl Dedia May is off to a stantastic fart....
Man, Vince Lombardi Really Dumped On The AFL After The First Super Bowl
One of those historic sports things I understand but don’t really get is the state of football leading up to the NFL-AFL merger. It was the first of the three big sports mergers over the next decade, and it’s absolutely alien to me: I’ve never lived through a successful competitor to a Big Four spor...
San Franciscans Have Declared War On Super Bowl Sculptures
The NFL sure is mighty excited to be holding the Super Bowl in the Bay Area. San Francisco residents appear less than excited to have them....
Your Pro Bowl Highlight Is Richard Sherman Dropping An RKO On Clay Matthews
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Oh No, J.J. Redick
It’s time again for us to make fun of the Clippers’ J.J. Redick, who today blew a bunny during L.A.’s home matchup with the Bulls. We imagine you’ll enjoy this, simply that even nine years into his pro career Redick is still the most hated player in college basketball....
The 1966 Pro Bowl Halftime Show Featured A Goose-Stepping Swastika Being Eaten By A Church
If you’re unversed on decades-old Pro Bowls, you’d be forgiven for thinking Fall Out Boy’s 2014 performance was the most offensive halftime show in the history of the NFL’s all-star game. But no! The 1967 Pro Bowl “The Taming Of The West” halftime show featured a tribute to Indian massacres, as note...
Oh Nooooo
Toupalik would sprint, again, and lose when they came back around for the real finish....
Thomas Davis Has "11 Or 12" Screws In His Arm, But He Plans To Play In The Super Bowl
A quick, gruesome recap of the maladies Panthers linebacker Thomas Davis has suffered: he’s torn his right ACL three times (no other player in NFL history has come back from three such tears on the same knee), he dislocated his finger then relocated it and made a tackle all on the same play, and he ...
Counterpoint: Oh God, I Think I'm Going To Be Sick
Here, as best I can approximate it in text, is the sound I made when I saw the above photo for the first time: Whuuhhuuhuhhhhhhuulckk. It was the sound of the sudden fear that I might puke. If the internet contains a more distressing photograph than that one, I will just have to take your word for i...
Would You Eat This? I Would Eat This
I don’t remember how, but we stumbled upon this recipe earlier in the week: a “Pepperoni Pizza Football Cheese Ball,” made by our new buddy Trish at Mom on Timeout. There were those on staff who were grossed out by what appears to be a neutron star of meaty cheesy gluttony. I disagree. Actually, the...
They Painted The Wrong End Zone At The Super Bowl
Members of the media got to poke around Levi’s Stadium yesterday, and watched the grounds crew paint the various logos on the field. But a couple of particularly observant folks noticed a minor screw-up....