pac Page 28 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Knights' fail
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Look at these dumb fuckers! They’re $10 million over the salary cap and still couldn’t finish in the top three of a division full of fuckwits and bindle-carriers! They couldn’t finish ahead of the Kings! The Kings who are led by Anze Kopitar and Drew Doughty, whose tires are so bald t...

Jerry Jones dumps on son for yucks
I do appreciate that Jerry Jones will actually get in front of a microphone and talk to the people. It’s something that his brethren in NFL ownership refuse to do, and maybe if they did they would have the most valuable sports franchise in the entire world. Is Jones talking for the sake of transpare...

Vince McMahon was just waiting for the dust to clear
It is hard to miss that Monday Night Raw has been built around, in large part, Riddle and Austin Theory of late. Riddle is one half of the wildly popular RK Bro tag team champs with legend Randy Orton, and appears to be on his way to headlining the company’s next PPV. You might wonder why he isn’t “...

Annoyed with the owner of your favorite team? Wait until Elon Musk gets started with Twitter
Everybody on earth may be into sports, but those that aren’t are about to be introduced to the quintessential sports-owner type. While there are a small number of unfathomably wealthy people, very little brings out the personalities in these gluttonous capitalists like owning a professional sports f...

Maybe Jack Eichel just isn’t that guy
If you’re trying to blow your own face off and fall down a sewer for comedic effect instead of securing a playoff spot, you’d have to give the Vegas Golden Knights an Emmy for their performance last night. Needing just about every point they can get to pass the Dallas Stars for the last wildcard spo...

AEW is leaning into its cult status, and I love it
The best way to enjoy AEW is to forget the ratings, at least past the point where you know it’s doing well enough to be successful, and is going to stay on the air and in existence. However it compares to whatever Chicago show is on NBC or whatever gas Tucker Carlson has been huffing that night, doe...

Green Bay has 11 picks in this year’s draft, but replacing Davante Adams won’t be easy
As the 2022 NFL draft approaches, the Green Bay Packers find themselves in retool mode after handing Aaron Rodgers a colossal contract extension and trading away All-Pro wide receiver Davante Adams. The good part of that equation is locking up Rodgers for the next few years and acquiring extra first...

Ranking the NBA’s first round matchups by how likely we are to see an upset
The NBA’s playoffs are easily the most predictable of the major American sports leagues. Without the variability of baseball or the single playoff game format like football, it’s pretty rare that there are any true upsets in the first round of the NBA playoffs. In most years you look at the bracket ...

Fictional Hooper Bracket: Billy Hoyle is the king of the silver screen
When Billy Hoyle told Sidney Deane he’s hustled players a helluva lot better than him, I was skeptical. How many times can you show up to a pickup game and aww shucks your way into a wad of cash? Well after six rounds and thousands of votes, it seems the scheme is still humming along....

Stop laughing at the Lakers for two seconds and give the Phoenix Suns a standing ovation
For those of you who were still awake when the Los Angeles Lakers sandcastle of a 2021-22 season finally washed away, we had a good time didn’t we? The jokes have been piling up all season with this new roster that improved on none of their weaknesses from last season and also had none of their stre...

Cody Rhodes got what he wanted, but what’s next?
When you get Cody Rhodes’s entrance at WrestleMania this past weekend — the drawn out silence before to build anticipation, the house lights being cut, importing his elevator through the stage from AEW, and 70,000 people losing their shit, it would be impossible to argue that Cody Rhodes was wrong i...

Nostalgia is WWE’s biggest weapon… with a tinge of spite
There might not be a promise I’ve broken more than saying I won’t mention AEW when discussing WWE, and vice versa. I’m not sure I’ve ever gotten it right. It’s not so easy when that’s the main narrative of the wrestling industry these days. And it’s also hard to avoid when WWE, on their biggest nigh...

🎵Now, this is a story all about how the life of Seattle Kraken DJ... is awesome🎵
The in-stadium experience is what makes going to sporting events fun. The energy that radiates from other fans of your favorite team, the mascot’s antics, and fan interaction through graphics on the jumbotron and the in-stadium camera crew make attending a live sporting event an unforgettable experi...

Five trade destinations for DK Metcalf should the Seahawks decide to move on
It’s been a whirlwind offseason for the Seattle Seahawks and their fanbase, with the potential to get even worse. The team started down the path of rebuilding by trading away Russell Wilson earlier this month. Soon after, rumors began circulating around 24-year-old wide receiver DK Metcalf potential...

Fictional Hooper Bracket: The Elite Eight
Welcome to the Elite Eight of the Fictional Hoopers Tournament. All the fat and sinew (Sandy Lyle and Steve Urkel) have been trimmed, and the characters left are all from powerhouse pictures. No one has been able to knock off either of White Men Can’t Jump’s main characters (celebrated last night at...

LeBron’s entire year has been a Razzie
On Oscar weekend, Space Jam: A New Legacy is being honored with a surprising distinction that has LeBron James stans flying their flags at half-mast. This isn’t a LeBron hate space, but we’ve got to keep it 100. I used to joke that LeBron would have been the perfect casting choice for Magic Johnson ...

The Golden Knights are so desperate they tried to trade a player they couldn’t trade
It was only a few days ago we chronicled that increasingly desperate situation the Golden Knights find themselves in. They have nothing more than a crimp grip on the last wildcard spot in the Western Conference, with the Dallas Stars having four games in hand on them just a point behind. ...

This Rickard Rakell pickup is very Penguins-y
The NHL trade deadline passed about an hour ago, and it wasn’t the most boring in the history of the game but it wasn’t the most exciting. The Bruins got better with Hampus Lindholm coming to town a couple days ago, except Hampus! Hampus! might not be that good anymore. The Avalanche, already the le...

The QuackAnon conspiracy theory
It was a year ago that Sedona Prince went on social media and showed the world the shabby treatment that the NCAA was giving to women’s basketball players compared to the men....

Fictional Hooper Bracket: Hickory Region
Welcome to the old-head section of the bracket. There’s a lot of striped socks and short shorts in this region, so it’s only right that these games are played in the dusty gym in Hickory, Ind. JImmy Chitwood catches a break getting to play at home, but he’s not the upset that is looming in this regi...