patrick Page 69 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

OSU Students Wallow In Their Own Urine
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Mario, Luigi Wanted For Assault, Battery
Super Mario Kart is the greatest sports game of all time; if you disagree, you are a Communist. That's why I bring you warning that the game is much uglier when translated into real life....

Phillies Win 16-Team "Who Gets To Lose To The Yankees" Tournament
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Never One To Seek The Spotlight, Danica Turns Down NASCAR
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

In Which We May Soon Celebrate Danica Patrick In All Her Glory And Extremes
When ESPN The Laddie Mag's Body Issue was announced, tWWL was assertive about not becoming Playboy, a magazine for which Danica Patrick has not posed nude. The Body Issue may — or may not! — distinguish itself in that way....

Patrick Kane Deprives World Of Potentially Amusing Trial
The Blackhawks forward pleads guilty to disorderly conduct and is ordered to apologize the cab driver he allegedly punched. So this whole sorry mess is behind us. Dang. [Mouthpiece Sports]...

How To Get A Woman To Start Thinking Divorce At Her Wedding
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Kane Vs. Cabbie Incident "Overblown" According To Everyone
Patrick Kane's taxi cab showdown has created an usual occurrence—lawyers from both sides of the incident complaining that the media has blown it out of proportion. That's no fun....

Dan Patrick Radio Listeners: If You Need Some Tasty Ear Candy To Jumpstart Your Tuesday...
It turns out SI's Dan Patrick is filming a scene for an upcoming Adam Sandler movie tomorrow so he needs fill-ins. Who'd he pick? Unfortunately for non-deaf America, not the ESL strippers from Rick's Cabaret....

Patrick Kane Reminds You Why You Should Never Take A Cab Ride In Buffalo
The Blackhawks winger was charged with two counts of felony second-degree robbery and the always popular "criminal mischief" after punching a cab driver and stealing his money. Hey, when you grow up in Buffalo 20 cents is worth the effort....

Hockey Arrests! Aww, Just Like A Real Sport
Blackhawks star Patrick Kane was arrested this morning for punching a cabbie who didn't have the 20 cents in change he wanted. So that's assault, robbery, and I'm going to assume underage drinking charges for the 20-year-old. [Buffalo News]...

Everybody Pile On D.J. Mbenga
First, Rudy Gay called him "ugly", then Reggie Miller revealed on the Dan Patrick show his text to Barkley after Lakers victory: "can you believe that DJ Mbenga and Adam Morrison have rings?"...

Add Trannies To The List Of People Faintly Annoyed By Danica Patrick
The new Danica Patrick commercial: clever deconstruction of gender identity or grievous insult to the transgender community? Discuss. [Trans Universe, via All Left Turns]...

Patrick Roy Is Not Interested In Saving Your Lousy Franchise
Patrick Roy finally admits that he was indeed offered the Colorado Avalanche coaching job, but has turned it down for "family reasons." Is the "reason" that his family is filled with insane, violent rageaholics? [Denver Post]...

Avalanche Coach The Next Victim Of A Roy Family Sucker Punch?
Patrick Roy is reportedly "mulling" an offer to be head coach of Colorado, even though current coach Tony Granato has not yet been fired. If that doesn't work, his sons will just rough Granato up in the parking lot. [Denver Post]...

Patrick Ewing Predicts Magic Will Win Game 7
But Doc Rivers knows better: "Oh that's great. We feel great about that. I've been on those Knicks teams where he had some predictions." [Green Street]...

Surprise: Pete Rose Thinks Steroids Are Worse Than Gambling
Because we haven't heard from him in a while, Pete Rose would like to weigh in on baseball's steroid crisis. I'm sure his comments won't at all be self-serving. Let's see.......

You Suck, Schuster!
A double in the top of the third ended Patrick Schuster's bid for a fifth consecutive no-hitter. [TampaTribune]...

Can This Kid Throw Five No-Hitters In A Row? (No Pressure!)
Florida high school pitcher Patrick Schuster goes for no-hitter No. 5 today in the state playoffs. But he already got his feature in the New York Times, so what's the point? [NY Times]...
