pe Page 1079 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sidney Crosby's Season Might Or Might Not Be Over
Sidney Crosby got to talking about his recovery from last month's concussion. He said he hopes to come back this season, but can't say for sure whether he will....
Dan Snyder Is So Awful People Will Pay For Vanity License Plates To Insult Him
For when a bumper sticker is not enough, the people of The District have found a new venue to publicly display their shared hatred for everyone's favorite petulant shit, Dan Snyder. Does Dave McKenna drive a Jeep?...
Listen To Jim Gray's Awful Super Bowl Sign-Off
Jim Gray delivered the Super Bowl sign-off for Westwood One Radio. It was already quite the piece of work, but adding the "Rudy" theme song really just brought it to another level....
We Are All Dave McKenna VII
Have you read Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder" yet? You should. We'll be linking to it every day until Snyder's dumbass libel suit is thrown to the dogs. Today's topics: Dan Snyder — petulant shit, rough talker, lapsed free-speech warrior....
Titans WR Kenny Britt Has A Problem With Bail Bondsmen
To hear Bails Bails Bails and Boss Bail Bonds tell it, Tennessee Titans WR Kenny Britt swore he'd cover the $12,500 necessary to cut his Jersey City boy Albert Robinson free of The Man's clutches, but when time come to pay, Britt didn't step up....
The Super Bowl Almost Broke Twitter
"[In] the final moments of the game, fans sent 4,064 Tweets per second – the highest TPS for any sporting event... Twitter users shattered that record six times over the course of the game." [Twitter Blog, Wired]...
Two Minutes Of Matt Cooke Cheap Shots
He's the kind of player you love if he's on your team. But for the fans of the 29 other fanbases, here's a highlight reel of Cooke's greatest hits to peruse while he sits out the next four games....
Who Wants To Watch Bear Bryant's Hat Get Chopped Up Into Little Pieces?
Panini America, which bought up the Donruss Trading Card Company in 2009, has released a video that details the extensive process of creating 100 memorabilia cards for distribution. This particular batch featured a thumbnail-sized swatch of fabric from one of Bear Bryant's old houndstooth hats. The ...
We Are All Dave McKenna VI
This is Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we will be linking daily until Snyder's dumbass lawsuit gets tossed into the Potomac. Today's topics: the Redskins' top PR guy covering himself in stupid, and Dan Snyder being a petulant shit....
Real American Fans Shut Out Of Real American Event Do Real American Thing And Sue
Somehow two silly displaced Super Bowl ticketholders and their eager lawyers managed to devise a lawsuit just as profoundly stupid as Dan Snyder's. They're seeking more than $5 million from the NFL, the Cowboys, and Jerry Jones personally. Why?...
Beer Commercials' Real Target Audience
Tom Scocca explains that all-male, groin-punch-infested beer ads are designed not for adults but teenage boys. Apparently, boys go to great lengths to procure beer. Who knew? But Scocca, like us all, still can't comprehend the Pepsi Max spots. [Slate]...
The Pittsburgh Paper's Solution For Shut Out Super Bowl Fans Is One Big Conflict Of Interest
Yesterday, an unsigned editorial ran in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, decrying the NFL's offer of compensation to those fans whose Super Bowl seats were unavailable, and demanding that the league pay them as much as $50,000 each. The editorial failed to mention that one of the people affected by the ...
The Man In The Orange Suit Could Not Believe His Eyes
Your morning roundup for Feb. 9, the day we realized we'd developed a dangerous addiction to Hint Of Lime Tostito chips....
We Are All Dave McKenna V
Presenting, once again, Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we will be linking daily until Snyder's dumbass lawsuit gets laughed out of court. Today's topics: Baja Fresh, propaganda, and Dan Snyder being a petulant shit....
The Blake Griffin Defense: Break His Neck
If there is one proven way to stop rookie All-Star Blake Griffin from scoring, it is to foul the living shit out of him. Of course, Griffin will often score anyway. But if he doesn't, and if he's not paralyzed after the foul, there is only about a 60 percent chance he'll capitalize on the ensuing ...
There Is An Army Of Senior Citizens Spying On Kansas Athletes
A volunteer army, with code names like "Red Dog," roams the halls of KU, making sure the athletes actually attend class. Don't fuck with them. They lived through The Big One....
A-Rod Gets Upset Over Popcorn Shot In Most A-Rod Way Possible
Believe it or not, Alex Rodriguez reportedly "went ballistic" after finding out that Fox ran this loving moment with girlfriend Cameron Diaz during the Super Bowl. He accused the cameraman of being "out to get them in a paparazzi-like shot," which, according to Bill Zwecker's source, is crazy becaus...
Michael Vick Gets Key To Dallas, Shit From Owner Of His Former Pit Bull
Michael Vick had a long week in Dallas. At first, he was maybe hosting a party with a SWAT team and its own trailer that eventually got called off and that he had "no intention of participating" in anyway. Luckily, Vick's personal mentor Tony Dungy canceled the party....
Christina Aguilera Is An Anti-American Slut, According To Pro-American Internet Commenters
"I got so caught up in the moment of the song that I lost my place," Aguilera has explained about last night's blunder. "I can only hope that everyone could feel my love for this country and that the true spirit of its anthem still came through." Sure, fair enough. Now let's check in with Real Ameri...
A Comprehensive Guide To That NFL Commercial With All The TV Characters
One of the best ads on last night's broadcast was for the NFL itself, in which they digitally inserted jerseys and logos into TV clips of yore. But the cuts were too quick to fully appreciate. Here's an annotated guide to the fake people inside your television, and their allegiances....