pe Page 1091 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Your NFL Early Games Open Thread
Of eight games, three look moderately entertaining; Miami at Baltimore (oh boy, Derrick Mason's mad about Channing Crowder calling him "the old guy" so he called him "Chowder"), Tampa Bay at Atlanta and San Diego at Houston....

Monkeys Will Sell Programs, Hear Complaints About Jobs At Today's NASCAR Race
Their names are Rocky and Miki and they're the size of your average housecat. From noon until 2 p.m., they'll be selling souvenir programs at Texas Motor Speedway....

All Record-Breaking Surfer Kelly Slater Needs Are Some Tasty Waves And He's Fine
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Your College Football Night Games Open Thread
Two Top-20 matchups: Arkansas hopes to bring more sororitears to South Carolina and Arizona goes to Stanford. Other noteworthy contests: Oklahoma at Texas A&M, Mizzou at Texas Tech, Louisiana-Lafayette at Mississippi....

Your College Football Afternoon Games Open Thread
Two Top-10 matchups: TCU at Utah (um, "national championship" atmosphere?) and Alabama at LSU. Two Top-4 teams playing: Oregon hosts Washington and Boise State hosts Hawaii. And, Nebraska makes its last conference-rival visit to Iowa Fucking State....

Why The Spectrum Got Looted Today And Thoughts About Stadiums Of Yesteryear
The Spectrum in Philadelphia is going to be demolished later this month, so there was a $25 take-all-you-can-carry event down there today....

Your College Football Early Games Open Thread
There's a battle of two Colorado Rockies prospects (N.C. State at Clemson), two Commander-in-Chief's Trophy aspirants (Air Force at Army) and unexpected Big 12 upstarts (Baylor at Oklahoma State)....

Prep Schoolers Up In Arms Over Plebeian Reporter Pointing Out That Their Crappy Football Team Sucks
The Sidwell Friends football team has been outscored 373-43 this season. When Washington City Paper columnist Dave McKenna pointed that out, he learned that the school's tony pansies are way feistier on the Internet than they are on the field....

Colin Cowherd's Asinine John Wall Rant, With Video Accompaniment
On Tuesday, John Wall played his first home game as a Washington Wizard. During his introduction, he came out to "Teach Me How To Dougie" and performed the accompanying dance. Colin Cowherd was less than thrilled because Colin Cowherd is an asshole....

Philadelphians Invited To Loot And Destroy; Yeah, This'll End Well
They're tearing down the Spectrum, but there's still a ton of crap inside. So for $25, fans get three hours alone with the old arena, and may take home whatever's not bolted down. They were probably going to do that anyway....

No, Halloween Revelers, That Wasn't The Real Scott Van Pelt
As far as ESPN anchor Halloween costumes go, the SVP is probably the easiest to pull off. Glasses, a microphone, a razor and some Turtle Wax. And a affable-yet-acerbic wit....

Breaking: Mick Foley Is In Our Office Right Now
That is all. [Jezebel]...

A Chilean Miner Is Running The NYC Marathon, Proving That We're All Rather Inadequate
How would the average person spend 69 days trapped underground? Edison Peña ran three to six miles daily. Now he's running in the NYC Marathon this weekend. Great. I'll be on a couch, trapped under a pile of wings....

An 86-Yard Punt Becomes Possible With Gale Force Winds (Update)
Last Tuesday's Washington-Huron playoff game featured this ridiculous punt from Huron's Derek Zwanziger. After a real boomer, the ball rolls, and rolls, then rolls a little more until Zwanziger's netted an 86-yarder. South Dakota high school football and science rule. [Argus Leader]...

Impressive Dunk Makes Announcer Shout Something Your Grandmother Might Say
With a clear lane to the hoop—thanks to Manu Ginobili getting burned going for a steal—Eric Gordon threw down a spectacular dunk last night. One that made Clippers play-by-play guy Ralph Lawler delightfully exclaim, "Oh me oh my!" [Awful Announcing]...

Your "Arena Football-Level Passing Numbers" Texans-Colts Open Thread
Indy is seriously banged up, but Houston has the worst passing defense in the league. Think Manning will throw a TD or five? Schaub to Johnson isn't too shabby either. AFC South supremacy on the line here. Musings below....

Your "First Of Three Consecutive Cliff Lee Starts" Giants-Rangers Open Thread
If Cliff Lee does his thing better than Tim Lincecum, we go back to the Bay. If not, the Giants are champs, and Lee signs for the league minimum next year. Enjoy this, possibly our last open thread. Until 8:30....

This Is The Worst Start To A Newscast Ever (UPDATE: Video Back)
Something is definitely afoot in San Diego's 10 News Communication Center, or at least something was on this particular day. Problems behind, in front of, and around the camera materialize at a rapid clip, making for sweet, wonderful, YouTubeable failure. [@richarddeitsch]...

Penn State Fans Mistake Halloween Costume For Michigan Gear, Kick Guy's Ass
Four PSU fans mistook another man's blue-and-yellow costume for UMich colors, and broke his nose at Beaver Stadium. They also bought a dude in a zombie costume a drink, thinking he was Joe Paterno. [Centre Daily Times]...

Your World Series Game Four Open Thread
It's time for Deep Thoughts from the Game Four Starters....