pe Page 1150 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

UNC Student Burned But Proud
As we learned in Lord of the Flies, dancing near bonfires often leads to the collapse of the social structure, and on occasion a trip to the North Carolina Jaycee Burn Center....

Things Got A Bit Nuts In Chapel Hill Monday Night
I'm not good at estimating crowds, but there must be at least 200 people down there on the intersection of Franklin and Columbia. (Give or take 30,000.) Street signs were destroyed, things were set ablaze, and high-voltage infrastructure was heroically scaled. What is it about mobs that makes them l...

Adrian Peterson Does Not Get Hockey
Like many a local celebrity before him, Adrian Peterson was given the honor kicking off the Minnesota Wild game last night with their traditional chant of "Let's Play Hockey." That didn't work out so well....

Do Not Cross The Hillsdale College Baseball Team
In a tradition as old as baseball itself, an editor who criticized the Hillsdale College (Mich.) baseball team's putrid record found his front porch decorated with dead animal carcasses, including a shotgunned goat....

Rest Easy America, The Lance Armstong Bike Thieves Are Behind Bars
After an exhaustive manhunt, Sacramento police have captured the people they think stole Lance Armstrong's bike during practice runs for the Tour of California on Feb. 15. And one is named Dung Le. [ABCNews10]...

Philadelphia Raises Its Championship Flag, Acts Accordingly
And it wasn't even Dollar Dog Night. But Phillies fans are not used to feeling superior and continue to adjust. Even though the frustration of 28 championship-less years has more or less disintegrated, there's obviously still a lot of bite with these puppies. A simple discourteous shove in Ashburn A...

Yankees All Of A Sudden Don't Like Fan Interference
It's hard to imagine an opening day that could have gone better for the Orioles, and that doesn't just include the torrent of abuse they let loose on "Treasonous Tex."...

Maybe B.J. Raji Isn't A Dopehead
Oh, anonymous sources ... you've done it again. Those crazy "web logs" have reported that at least six football players failed pre-draft drug tests, which the players naturally deny. So whose pants are on fire?...

Your Team's Season Is Already Over
The Yankees offseason maneuvers are a complete and total disaster. They might as well have taken $340 million and dumped it in the Harlem River for all the good it did them. What a disgrace....

The Worst Ceremonial First Pitches Of All Time
In honor of opening day, here's a tribute to those who wish they could throw like a girl. Seriously, who invited the freakin' dinosaur? [Watch This Now]...

Yet Another Smart Play From Zach Randolph
The competent, level-headed L.A. Clippers forward was arrested early this morning on suspicion of drunk driving. Does it seem unfair to anyone else that this man drives a Rolls-Royce? [ESPN]...

Your Opening Day Open(ing) Thread
Mets and Reds kick things off at 1:00 p.m., followed by Indians-Rangers, Yankees-Orioles, and whatever other games don't get rained out today. Pithy and informative comments may be left below. Welcome back, old friend. [Scoreboard]...

I'm Assuming The Tar Heels Are Also Welcome To Service Sparty
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

It's Back To Reality
So Brett Myers did his usual opening day routine to sour the flag-hoisting ceremony at CBP. On a positive note, it took 20 minutes before the first boo. Still champions. [Philly.com]...

Finally ... Baseball Will Save Us All!
Thank goodness it's here. It's been a rough 2009 so far, but it is finally time for the baseball season to arrive and soothe our weary souls....

Eric Mangini Will Destroy USC Football From The Inside
Here's a nightmare scenario for Trojan fans everywhere—head coach Pete Carroll announced that he has been "talking ball" with the Browns new chief Eric Mangini....

Dustin Pedroia Thinks Very Highly Of Alex Rodriguez
From this month's Boston magazine: "That guy," he will say, pausing for a moment to find the right word, "is a dork." [Boston Magazine]...

Brave Woman Gives Eyewitness Testimony Of The Salisbury Cell Phone Incident
The Sean Salisbury cell phone saga has always seemed to me to be a lot like the legend of Bigfoot; shrouded in mystery, leaving large tracks but not much in the way of tangible proof....

Officer Who Stopped Ryan Moats Cries No Mas, Quits Dallas PD
You've seen the video, you've marveled at the tattoo. But you won't have Dallas police officer Robert Powell to kick around anymore; his attorney announced today that Powell has resigned....

The Kendra Wilkinson-Carmen Electra Stripper Pole War IS ON
If you've already purchased one of those inferior Carmen Electra stripper poles, throw it out. Kendra Wilkinson, who is engaged to the Eagles' Hank Baskett, is introducing her own line of stripper poles....