pe Page 1196 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Tree Grows In Bristol
We know the big ESPN interoffice complaint memorandum we posted on Tuesday was enormous and unwieldy, but seriously, folks: It's an absolute treasure trove of gorgeous goodness. So, for the rest of the week, we'll be highlighting two particularly hilarious and illustrative segments from the memo eac...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after another typical commute on the Poplar Street Bridge ... • MLB: Mets at Padres. Maine vs. Maddux! Get it on! [Channel 4 Padres] • Cycling: Tour de France. Which object will collide with the bikes this time? [Versus] • MLB: Tigers at Twins. Unless it's Twins at Tigers. [ESPN]...
ESPN Would Rather Not Use Their Own Phones
We know the big ESPN interoffice complaint memorandum we posted yesterday was enormous and unwieldy, but seriously, folks: It's an absolute treasure trove of gorgeous goodness. So, for the rest of the week, we'll be highlighting two particularly hilarious and illustrative segments from the memo each...
Your British Open Preview
Hey, one of them "Major" "Championships" is going on in the whole golf world this weekend, the British Open. It's at the Carnoustie Golf Links, which is in Scotland, and as we all know, if it's not Scottish, it's crap....
John Skipper Defines Leadership
We know the big ESPN interoffice complaint memorandum we posted yesterday was enormous and unwieldy, but seriously, folks: It's an absolute treasure trove of gorgeous goodness. So, for the rest of the week, we'll be highlighting two particularly hilarious and illustrative segments from the memo each...
ESPN's Secret Interoffice Complaint Memorandum
Sometimes we forget, in all the frustrations and angst that watching ESPN causes us, that Bristol really is just an office. An office with a cafeteria, a human resources department, water coolers, parking spaces and football analysts who take pictures of their penis. It's like all of our offices. So...
Ruminations On Scott Van Pelt
So we've been receiving a little bit of blowback after our rather inexplicable appearance on ESPN Radio with Scott Van Pelt on Friday. Mainly, we think people wanted us to have some sort of Jon Stewart on "Crossfire" moment; during our brief appearance on the airwaves, we should have, apparently, go...
Tommy Morrison Is A Deep Thinker
One would think "boxer" Tommy Morrison's constant claims that AIDS is "an invented virus" making money for the drug industry, and that "heterosexuals can't transmit the virus" would inspire people to stop taking him seriously and no longer listen to him. That hasn't worked, but maybe his new enlight...
A Perfectly Appropriate Keepsake
Under normal circumstances, we couldn't imagine a way that we would ever buy our father a birthday present — August 6, everybody; postmark Bryan Leitch, Mattoon, Illinois! — that's a piece of Chicago Cubs memorabilia. But this might just be an exception....
Jesus Wore A Floppy Hat For Your Sins
Speaking just for myself, I am never happier than when I'm at a baseball game watching the Gay Men's Chorus while wearing a floppy hat. But leave it to certain groups to take all of the fun out of my weekends....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while wondering what the heck everyone is laughing about ... • Running of the Bulls: Six more people gored today as the bulls threaten to turn this one into a rout. • Soccer: U.S. Under-20 World Cup team beats nation of 1.7 million with a 20 percent unemployment rate. • Fencing: Braz...
Kige Ramsey Is Full Of Homespun Opinions
If you can't get enough of our YouTube Sports correspondent Kige Ramsey — we loved his reasoned, rational and thoughtful analysis on Kevin Durant's and Greg Oden's struggles in the summer league — it's your lucky day....
Worry Not, Everybody: You'll Be Seeing Plenty Of Bud Selig
We know that you, like us, have been on your proverbial pins and your proverbial needles wondering whether or not baseball commissioner Bud Selig would attend the game in which Barry Bonds destroys our collective faith in humanity by breaking Hank Aaron's home run record. Wonder no longer!...
Spike Is Here, Kids, And He's READY TO BALL
We've talked to you before about Spike, The Super Ball, the official mascot of Super Bowl XLII at the Pink Taco in Glendale next February. Well, now, Spike is making public appearances. We are all of sudden SO EXCITED about Super Bowl XLII, thanks to Spike's signature brand of crowd-pleasing banter...
Your Definitive RPS Report
We didn't have the opportunity to watch the big replay of the Rock Paper Scissors tournament over the weekend — what a grand three days of sports we have on tap this week! — but we were hoping that it was like competitive eating, in that there was a modicum of training and skill involved. According ...