pens Page 12 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Keith Olbermann Explains Why He Got Into That Dumb Twitter Fight
Keith Olbermann is a guest on the Late Show with David Letterman tonight, and part of their taped conversation has already been uploaded onto YouTube by the show. In it, Olbermann and Letterman discuss the the dumbass Twitter fight he got into with Penn State fans and students that led ESPN to suspe...
James Harden Suspended One Game For Kicking LeBron James
The NBA just announced that James Harden will miss one game and one game check for a kick to the inner thigh of LeBron James during last night's Rockets OT win over the Cavs. He'll miss Houston's game against the Hawks tomorrow....
Adrian Peterson Wins Suspension Appeal
Federal judge David Doty has ruled in favor of the NFLPA's motion to end Vikings running back Adrian Peterson's indefinite suspension. The ruling vacates a previous ruling by arbitrator Harold Henderson, who upheld Peterson's suspension back in December....
An Exceedingly Polite Beginner's Guide To Anal Sex
Anal play, as you likely well know by now, is having its moment. Hell, even Vogue is writing about it, and Harvard is, like, teaching classes about the basics of butt-banging. But we can't all go to Harvard (and thank God for that), which means that the 101-type stuff that a lot of curious folks m...
Anderson Silva And Nick Diaz Both Flunk Drug Tests
If Deadspin had a "LOLUFC" tag, this would be the perfect story to append it to. ...
Josh Gordon Officially Suspended By NFL For "At Least" A Season
It was inevitable once Adam Schefter reported that Josh Gordon had tested positive for alcohol, but today the NFL made it official: Gordon is suspended for the entirety of the 2015 football season. The Browns released a statement confirming the suspension—which is without pay and for "at least one y...
Tommy Craggs Owes Me Money
In August, I learned that the Jell-O people were rolling out an expanded line of college football logo Jell-O molds and that, in the course of promoting them, the Jell-O people were loudly proclaiming that they WERE NOT to be used to make Jell-O shots. I proceeded to completely lose my mind at the i...
Holiday Gift Guide: For Your Generous Party Host
One of the best things you can give to a friend who has invited you into his or her home for the holidays is something good to drink. But telling you to buy a bottle of booze would make for a pretty boring, if practical, Gift Guide. (If you do buy a bottle of booze, be a love and wrap it nicely?)...
Report: Adrian Peterson Skips Previously Agreed To Hearing With NFL
Since pleading no contest to child injury charges almost two weeks ago, Adrian Peterson has been embroiled in a dispute with the NFL about when he can return to the field. A Facebook post from Adam Schefter reveals that Peterson and the NFL had previously agreed to a disciplinary hearing scheduled...
Reports: Aldon Smith's Suspension Could Be Terminated Shortly
Aldon Smith was suspended nine games by the NFL in August, after he was sentenced on weapons and DUI charges. But according to a report from Mike Florio and confirmed by Chris Mortensen, the NFL is considering reducing that suspension by one or two games. Since Smith has already sat out seven game...
LaRon Landry Responds To PED Suspension With Penis Illusion
Colts safety LaRon Landry was just hit with a four-game suspension for taking PEDs, which should surprise absolutely no one who has ever seen LaRon Landry. But Landry seems to be pleading innocence, at least according to a weird picture he just put on his Instagram page...
NFL Lifts Dion Jordan's 4-Game Suspension, Suspends Him 4 More Games
Back in July, the NFL suspended Dolphins defensive end Dion Jordan four games for taking "banned stimulants" that violated the league's performance-enhancing substance policy. Good news! The league lifted Jordan's ban today, after two games. Bad news! The NFL suspended Jordan four more games....
Wes Welker Suspended Four Games For Amphetamines (And Maybe Molly, Too)
Well, damn. According to Adam Schefter, the NFL will give Broncos wide receiver Wes Welker a four-game suspension for violating the league's performance-enhancing drug policy. Welker reportedly used amphetamines. (Update: Molly?)...
Mariners Suspend Jesus Montero For Ice Cream Incident With Scout
Last week we told you about an incident involving Mariners catcher Jesus Montero, a heckling team scout, and a hurled ice cream sandwich. In light of what happened, the Mariners have decided to suspend Montero for the rest of the season....
ESPN Insider: Suspensions Creating "Minefield" For Shout Show Hosts
Education reformers often cite reducing suspensions in our nation's schools as a top priority. Lots of recent studies show that this form of punishment does more harm than good. ...
Another Miami Dolphin Suspended For PEDs
Miami Dolphins safety Reshad Jones has been suspended four games for violating the league's policy on performance enhancing drugs, the NFL announced today in a classic Friday news dump....
Report: Dustin Johnson Had "Sexual Indiscretion" With PGA Player's Wife
Yesterday, golfer Dustin Johnson released a statement saying he would be stepping away from the game to take care of "personal challenges." According to a report today on Golf.com, Johnson was suspended six months for testing positive for cocaine. He's allegedly failed three drug tests since 2009,...
How Do Other Notable NFL Suspensions Compare With Ray Rice's?
With news coming down that Ray Rice will be suspended a mere two games for knocking out his wife and then dragging her unconscious body out of an elevator, we figured it would be constructive to look back at the length and severity of other notable NFL suspensions from the past....
Asshole Cannot Find Pen, Writes Entire <em>NYT</em> Trend Piece About It
Even by the standards of fake trend pieces in the The New York Times, today's column in about "The Demise of the Pen" in—where else?—the fashion and style section is exceptionally breathtaking in its presumptuousness. Join me now and marvel as writerer Nick Bilton turns a moment of sheer banality i...