pr Page 647 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Andy Dalton, Seventh Alternate QB, Will Play In The Dumb Pro Bowl
When the NFL totaled up the votes and named six QBs to the Pro Bowl, it also drew up a list of alternates for when players inevitably bailed due to injury or just having better things to do. That list of alternates goes down a long way. Andy Dalton, basically the King Ralph of quarterbacks, is a Pro...
Which Over-The-Hill Wrestler Looked Worst On Tonight's <i>WWE Raw</i>?
Tonight's WWE Raw has been an evening of legends, but most of those in attendance are decades past their expiration date. Which wrestler wore it worst?...
Just How The Damn Hell Did Arsenal Pull That Off?
A few hours before the NFC Championship, an ocean away, a game of real football took place in England's Premier League between second-place Manchester City and fifth-place Arsenal. I'll spare you the drama: the good guys won....
Bathroom Sex Had At Bull-Riding Event
A tipster who attended a Professional Bull Riders event at Madison Square Garden this weekend sends along the above photo. Allow him to describe the scene:...
"He Looks Like Voldemort"
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....
The Taxpayer Extortion Playbook: How To Ignore The NFL Playoffs Today
While all attention focuses on this afternoon's two championship games, the NFL is quietly and methodically running its taxpayer extortion playbook on the people of St. Louis. The Los Angeles trump card, the NFL's longtime key leverage in stadium negotiations, is being deployed with particular oomph...
A Lesson On Offside Calls For FIFA Officials Who Don't Understand Them
At least two egregiously bad offside calls were made this morning, one of which influenced a major cup tournament outcome. Since it appears FIFA referees (and, in one case, soccer broadcasters) don't understand this basic rule, we're going to illustrate them....
CBS: Greg Anthony Indefinitely Suspended After Prostitution Arrest
CBS says basketball analyst Greg Anthony is indefinitely suspended and will call no more games this season after his arrest yesterday in a D.C. prostitution sting. The misdemeanor arrest leaves Anthony looking at up to a half-year in jail....
How To Be A Beer Enthusiast Without Being A Beer Asshole
Beer is so, so good. All of it gets you drunk, and a lot of it even tastes good in the process! What more could you ask for? Maybe just a quick little primer on how to get the most out of the experience? What's that? "No," you say? "Fuck that," in fact, you say?...
MLB, The Giants, And The Law Job The A's ... Again
Major League Baseball is breathing a huge sigh of relief after a federal appeals court upheld a broad scope of the league's exemption from federal antitrust law on Thursday. But the league's win comes at a high price for the Oakland A's—and adds to the literal shitstorm the A's are in at the old a...
How U.S. Soccer Ensures The Fort Lauderdale Strikers Never Get A Chance
Last year, the Fort Lauderdale Strikers were purchased by a Brazilian consortium looking to turn the team into a "global powerhouse." Some of their bandied-about strategies for ginning up fan interest include drone-delivered concessions at the stadium, piggy backing off the club's history from the...
Key And Peele's Parody Of Football Pregame Shows Is Pitch Perfect
Key and Peele are always good when they turn their attention toward sports, and this latest bit, in which they play bloated ex-NFL players who are now pundits, is no exception....
Oscar Nominations Won’t Solve A Fucking Thing
Okay, so the Oscar nominations came out this morning, and all of the acting categories feature white nominees, and all the Best Picture nominees are stories about dudes. As you can imagine, the Problem Internet was not pleased with this development. We go right to the takes!...
Read The Questions Given To Potential Aaron Hernandez Jurors
Over three days, 1,055 people — minus the guy in a Bruins jersey who screamed "Go Pats!" and was sent home — filed through Bristol Superior Court for jury selection in Aaron Hernandez's upcoming murder trial. They were each given a 51-question juror questionnaire which you can read below (and comple...
<i>Price Is Right</i> Announcer Tries To Run Backward On Treadmill, Eats It
George Gray has been The Price Is Right's subpar replacement for the irreplaceable Rod Roddy for four years now, and this is not his best moment. To his credit, Gray finished his spiel without a hitch; he's still no anthem singer. ...
Jozy Altidore, The Striker Who Never Was, Is Coming Back Home
Yesterday, news broke that perennial Premier League bottom feeders Sunderland had reached a swap deal with Major League Soccer. American striker Jozy Altidore is leaving Sunderland for MLS's Toronto FC. English striker Jermain Defoe, who just joined Toronto FC from Tottenham last summer, is going to...
How To Clean A Frat House, And Keep It That Way
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
Report: Mikhail Prokhorov Is Trying To Sell The Nets
Welp. According to Bloomberg Business, Mikhail Prokhorov, the Russian billionaire who just five years ago plunked down $220 million for an 80 percent share of the Brooklyn Nets and then went ahead and built a massive new arena in Brooklyn, is looking to sell his team....
The NFL Has No Idea Who's Going To Coach The Pro Bowl
Try to care about the Pro Bowl for a second. Or, rather: try to care about some NFL execs' lives being made more stressful because of the Pro Bowl. (See? Much easier when you think of it that way.)...
Matt Cooke Cross-Checks Shea Weber In The Nose, Pays For It
Whether Matt Cooke was frustrated with a two-goal deficit or just in a mood to instigate, he cross-checked Shea Weber in the third period of Saturday night's Predators-Wild game. His stick hit Weber right in the nose, and the Predators captain proceeded to beat the fuck out of Cooke....