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Attention Hockey Players: Doctors Would Like To See Inside Your Brain-Damaged Noggins
Former Red Wing/Hurricane/Flyer Keith Primeau will donate his soft squishy hockey brain to science. Now ... or is he still using it? [Freep]...
Orioles Fans Prepared To Explain To Teixeira That All Is Forgiven
The weather looks fine for the Orioles home opener today against the Yankees (4 p.m., ET), with the forecast calling for scattered clouds, variable winds and a 95 percent chance of heavy cursing at Mark Teixeira....
Lucky Teens Headed To Final Four On Mickey D's Dime
Here's a bit of pre-Final Four happiness. Remember Patrick Thibodeau, the Down Syndrome kid who played, and scored, for his high school basketball team? Well, he'll be at the Final Four and you won't....
Michael Vick Is Still An Idiot
Yesterday, a Virginia bankruptcy court rejected Michael Vick's, um, completely idiotic bankruptcy plan. Why? Perhaps it was a bad idea for a broke, unemployed athlete to claim he needs two houses and four cars....
If You've Eaten A Four-Pound Burger, Of Course You'll Need A Giant Plunger
Still grappling with the media frenzy over its monstrous 5,000-calorie burger, the West Michigan Whitecaps, masters of the metaphor, have installed a giant plunger in the outfield that squirts water on fans....
'Where's The Love?,' Asks Blogger Who Broke Green Death Email Story
Call this the story of how a Boston blogger broke the "Green Death Crazy Soccer Coach Email" story, yet somehow failed to get any credit for it....
Brewers Fan Saves Bikini Girl From Rogue Home Run Ball
Imagine a young woman innocently sunbathing at a baseball game, when a vicious home run ball comes rocketing toward her unsuspecting frame, with nothing but a bikini top to defend herself? What do you do?!...
Kim Kardashian And Photoshop Not Getting Along Lately
So here's an interesting photo from the Reggie Bush-Kim Kardashian spread in the April issue of GQ. Anyone see anything wrong here? Or more specifically, anything missing?...
Tales From An American Football Player In Austria
Robert Lunn is a former defensive tackle from UCONN. He graduated in 2008 and is now playing professional football — in Portchach, Austria. He's graciously shared some of the things he's experienced so far....
Former Gators Have Their Priorities In Order
Former Florida Gator Brent Wright is in a wee bit of trouble with his Croatian League basketball squad for oversleeping and missing an away game. Um, this photo may have something to do with that....
Hasheem Thabeet Would Like You To Know He Failed A Drug Test
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Minor League Team Invites You To Watch A Game FROM A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER
If your lifelong dream has been to watch a minor league baseball game from a 1978 GMC van parked just beyond the outfield near a major river, then you're in luck, my fat motivational-speaking friend....
Woman Somehow Resists Kurt Angle Love Sonnet
You're forgiven if you've forgotten that Kurt Angle was once a serious athlete. In addition to being a championship college grappler, he won a gold medal in freestyle wrestling at the 1996 Atlanta Olympics....
Darren Daulton Still Delightfully Nuts
One would think that with the power of astral travel, Darren Daulton would choose to visit Vienna during the Renaissance, or Rome during the reign of the Caesars. But a card show in Ephrata, Pa.?...
Jose Tabata: Wife 'Completely Falsified Her Pregnancy'
The story of Jose Tabata and his 43-year-old wife is the gift that keeps on giving. Today's episode: She apparently told the 20-year-old outfielder that the baby she (allegedly) abducted was his....
NCAA Sweet 16: (1) North Carolina vs. (4) Gonzaga
East Region: No. 1 North Carolina (30-4) vs. No. 4 Gonzaga (28-5) When: Thursday, 9:57 p.m., EDT Where: FedExForum, Memphis, Tennessee NORTH CAROLINA TAR HEELS 1) Make it Wayne Let's get this out of the way for those waking from comas: Tyler Hansbrough is the ACC's all-time leading scorer and Tywo...
NCAA Sweet 16: (2) Michigan State vs. (3) Kansas
West Region: No. 2 Michigan State (28-6) vs. No. 3 Kansas (27-7) When: Thursday, 9:37 p.m., EDT Where: Lucas Oil Stadium, Indianapolis, Indiana MICHIGAN STATE SPARTANS 1) START THE CLOCK! I would like to thank Pete for reminding me about one of the darkest moments in MSU basketball history. (See b...
Hanley Ramirez Fights The Power And Seethes
Upset with the Marlins stringent new dress code, Marlins shortstop Hanley Ramirez Sharpie'd" I'm sick of this shit" on his chest to protest. [NBC Miami]...
NCAA Sweet 16: (2) Oklahoma vs. (3) Syracuse
South Region: No. 2 Oklahoma (29-5) vs. No. 3 Syracuse (28-9) When: Friday, 7:27 p.m., EDT Where: FedExForum, Memphis, Tennessee OKLAHOMA SOONERS 1) So we meet again The last time Oklahoma and Syracuse met on the hardwood, it was in the East regional final of the 2003 NCAA tournament. The third-se...
More Thinking Outside The Box From The NFL Meetings
The NFL "is exploring the possibility of having sponsor logos worn unobtrusively on practice jerseys." For the Bengals I suggest Chico's Bail Bonds. [USA Today]...