rad Page 190 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Rockies Sacrificed Seven Baseballs On The Altar Of The Dinger Gods
Last night in Colorado, whispers rode on the winds coming from the mountains in the west. Those who listened closely could hear a call to action. “Dingers,” the whispers said. “Slake our ancient thirst. Bring us... dingers.”...
Brad Nessler Will Replace Verne Lundquist In CBS College Football Booth
A CBS sports press release confirms what’s been rumored for weeks: longtime ESPN announcer Brad Nessler is coming to CBS, and after the 2016 season will replace the legendary Verne Lundquist as play-by-play man on “SEC on CBS” games....
Tom Brady Will Appeal Ballghazi Suspension, Again
In the year 2184, when Tom Brady’s head is thawed from cryostasis to testify against Robo-Goodell in Moon Court, your descendants may wonder how the longest-running legal battle in the history of sports ever got started. (Their neural visit to the electro-sapio-repository will tell them it was about...
Brother Of Brussels Bomber Will Compete In The Olympics
Mourad Laachraoui is one of the best young taekwondo fighters in the world; the 21-year-old won the 54kg weight class at the European Championships yesterday, and will represent Belgium at the Summer Olympics in August—six months after his brother blew himself up in the Brussels terror attacks that ...
Phil Mickelson Named In Insider Trading Complaint
Golfer Phil Mickelson was named today in an insider complaint by the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, two years after an investigation was first reported. The SEC alleges that Mickelson profited $931,000 from non-public information after buying and selling stock in the Dean Foods company....
Brad Ausmus Put His Rage-Quit Sweatshirt Up For Auction
If the venn diagram of your interests has an overlap between “helping charity” and “Brad Ausmus memorabilia”, oh boy, you won’t believe what MLB has in store for you. For the low price of $10, you can increase the bid on this live auction for Brad Ausmus’ authentic home plate meltdown sweatshirt. Wh...
Surviving A Graduation
Graduation felt like petering-out more than a crisp conclusion to what was—fill in your own blanks—maybe the most hedonistic, maybe the most edifying, probably the most tumultuous phase of a young life. The whole spectacle was stretched thin over too many days, a slow and tedious death....
Brad Ausmus Melts Down, Curses Out Ump, Claims Home Plate With His Sweater
The Tigers were up 8-0 on the Twins after the first inning, and they’ve spent the next seven inning melting down and letting them tie it up. After Nick Castellanos struck out in the fourth inning, Tigers manager Brad Ausmus went straight at home plate umpire Doug Eddings and got tossed after very gr...
Bob Bradley's Le Havre Miss Out On Promotion To Ligue 1 By One Goal
Aww hell. Bob Bradley, former USMNT coach, took over French second-division club Le Havre in November and got the team off and running towards promotion to Ligue 1. Heading into today, Le Havre trailed Metz by three points and six goals. To make it to a top European league for the first time, Bradle...
Jose Reyes Suspended 52 Games For Domestic Violence Arrest
MLB commissioner Rob Manfred just announced that Rockies shortstop Jose Reyes will be suspended through May 31. Reyes was arrested for allegedly grabbing his wife by the throat and shoving her into a sliding glass door this past Halloween. He was placed on leave by the Rockies on February 23, and wa...
Jon Gray Wants To Hunt Some Ghosts
Jon Gray is a young and strong pitcher who, if everything goes just right, could be a legitimate ace for the Colorado Rockies. During an interview on MLB Network Radio, Gray also revealed that he wants to hunt some dang ghosts....
On Safe Spaces: A Message For College Graduates
Oh God, it’s graduation season. Can’t we pause this somehow? I just got done adjusting to the LAST graduating class entering the workforce and ruining everything. Can’t we put a five-year moratorium on graduations so that the rest of the world can take a breather? You’re all exhausting and terrible,...
Tracy McGrady Says Steph Curry Only Won The MVP Unanimously Because The NBA Is Watered Down
The hot sports take may be a little endangered baby bird, but Tracy McGrady performed a remarkable act of conservation this morning on The Jump, when he said that Steph Curry’s unanimous MVP win was more due to the watered-down level of competition in today’s NBA compared to years past. Pablo Torre ...
Sam Bradford Ends Extremely Weak Holdout
The crisis that has paralyzed the Philadelphia Eagles for 15 harrowing days is finally over: Sam Bradford has put an end to his holdout....
We Have Found It, The Place All Hot Takes Are Born
Deep in the heart of Take Forest, at the peak of Mt. Take, lies the source of all takes....
Check Out Some Candid 2010 Pre-Draft Assessments By Oakland Raiders Scouts
Solid evidence has surfaced online that the Oakland Raiders have staffers who evaluate talent, and moreover, that they sometimes know what they’re talking about. A post up on Imgur this weekend purports (credibly, it seems) to have the Raiders’ pre-draft evaluations from 2010. It’s not a huge galler...
How To Be A Radiohead Fan Without Being A Dipshit About It
Radiohead dropped a new single this week called “Burn The Witch” and it’s fucking gold. It sounds like a Smiths song and a Hitchcock film score hopped in bed together. I’ve listened to it twenty times over the past day, and now I’m afraid everyone is out to get me. It’s all of the paranoia of cocain...
Chris Mortensen Deserves Better Than This Maudlin Peyton Manning Gatorade Ad
It’s simply got to be gnawing at Chris Mortensen, the longtime ESPN NFL reporter, to be missing the draft this year. He announced in January that he’s got throat cancer, Stage IV, and that’s all kinds of terrible for anyone, not least for a guy who trades on having a voice. Since the draft kicked of...
The Boston Celtics Will Soon Be Terrifyingly Good
The Boston Celtics lost to the Atlanta Hawks 104-92 last night, knocking them out of the first round of the playoffs. It’s the last time for the foreseeable future that the Celtics will exit the playoffs so early. ...
Spanish Soccer Officials Believe This Is What Match-Fixing Looks Like
Unless Marchamalo player Mario’s languid dribbling style here is literally hypnotizing, then this barely impeded run of his through the entirety of Toledo B’s half en route to goal might be some pretty strong evidence of match-fixing....