ric Page 401 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ryan Fitzpatrick Is Stealing Jameis Winston's Job
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers improved to 2-0 on this young season by beating the defending champion Philadelphia Eagles 27-21 this afternoon. They won the game thanks in large part to backup quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick, who will be elevated to the Bucs’ Plan A if he keeps playing like this....
Goddamn, Patrick Mahomes Looks Good
Hello, welcome to the Week 2 meeting of the Patrick Mahomes fan club. I know it’s early. But our boy is throwing bolts....
White-Collar Crime Is Apparently Not Enough To Halt An NFL Career
After pleading guilty to federal charges of insider trading, linebacker Mychal Kendricks will be sentenced in January of next year. That doesn’t mean he can’t still continue his side hustle as a pro football player, though....
Sociopathic Barstool Founder Dave Portnoy Giddy About "Suffocating" ESPN Host Sam Ponder In "Online War"<em></em><em></em>
Barstool Sports founder president Dave Portnoy yet again has gleefully engineered a targeted harassment campaign against a woman who he thinks wronged his company....
Yep, America's Worst Human Is Still President
Hey pals. How’s your morning been? Did your Breakfast Behemoth turn out okay? Here’s what the President of the United States has been up to:...
Colorado Sports Fan's Plan To Rob Vape Store Falls Apart After He Drops Gun And Pants
This guy here, by appearances an avid Broncos and Rockies fan, spectacularly failed to rob an E-Cig of Denver store in Colorado on Sept. 2. Fumbling his gun over the counter was a bad start, and failing to secure his pants was a bad follow-up, although he did redeem himself somewhat with a super coo...
Maybe Change Is A Bad Thing?
It was a bad week to be an NFL coach making his debut on their new team. After Jon Gruden’s Raiders decided to allow the Rams to score 23 straight points on their way to a 33-13 loss, new coaches ended the first week of the regular season a combined 0-7, breaking a 17-year NFL record....
I Ate Like A Football Player And Suffered Like A Blogger
This week, Deadspin and Jezebel swap beats to celebrate America’s most dangerous and controversial pastimes: football and fashion, two sports that have far more in common than you think....
Blue Jays' Randal Grichuk Busted Up In Collision With Security Guard's Stool
In the fourth inning of Sunday’s Indians-Blue Jays tilt, right fielder Randal Grichuk charged in on a foul pop off the bat of Brandon Guyer. Grichuk is watching the ball the whole way in, and never sees the on-field security guard backing away from the on-rushing Justin Smoak:...
If You Don't Want To Watch A Man Shoot Out A Turd Into A Toilet From Way Downtown, Here's A Summary<em></em>
The camera is facing a toilet....
People Are Destroying Their Nike Gear Because Of Colin Kaepernick
Colin Kaepernick is the new face of a Nike ad campaign. As you might imagine, this has really angered the type of people who have said, “I’m a Christian first, and a conservative second” out loud at the dinner table. And if there’s one thing you can expect from these people, it’s that they will go a...
This Is The Stupidest Shit On The Entire Internet
A few weeks ago, I learned about a dystopian gathering called OzyFest where people paid real American dollars to gaze longingly at thinkfluencers and hear soup-brained psychopaths like Karl Rove host panels. The Silicon Valley–funded Ozy—which is somehow not an incisive performance art piece about o...
Tom Jurich's Kid Throws Wild Hissy Fit Over The Location Of His Disgraced Dad's Louisville Tickets
Mark Jurich, son of former Louisville athletic director Tom Jurich, is extremely, extremely pissed about the location of the 20 years’ worth of tickets granted to his family as part of his dad’s termination last autumn. The tickets are not the tickets they’re used to, and Mark is reading an awful lo...
Browns Cut Mychal Kendricks Following Federal Insider Trading Charges
That was quick. The Cleveland Browns officially released linebacker Mychal Kendricks tonight after he was indicted on federal insider trading charges earlier in the day. GM John Dorsey said in a statement that the team knew Kendricks was part of an investigation before he was signed, but only as a v...
Olympic Champion Swimmer Uses Dogsitter, Comes Home To Find Two Shirtless Guys On Couch With Lube And Camera
Former Olympic swimmer and two-time gold medalist Klete Keller used the app Wag to find a dogsitter, and very much regretted it when he came home to find two shirtless men on his couch with “personal lubricant” and a camera....
Browns Linebacker Mychal Kendricks Charged With Insider Trading
Federal authorities have charged former Eagles and current Browns linebacker Mychal Kendricks with insider trading. According to charging documents released by the government today, Kendricks made $1.2 million from illegal trades that were based on tips given to him by former investment banker Damil...
<i>Washington Post</i> Op-Ed: John McCain Will Haunt Donald Trump Into Defeat From The Mirror Dimension
An increasingly prominent part of my life in 2018 is the urge to grab and cling onto anything that seems, even a little bit, like it might be the thing that Finally Defeats Donald Trump. No small portion of my day is spent managing my relationship to that urge, struggling against its downward pull, ...
Players' Attorney In Sexual Misconduct Case Shreds Maryland Athletic Department As "Dysfunctional Viper Pit"
Donald Jackson, the Alabama-based attorney paid using athletic department funds to represent two players accused by a fellow student of sexual assault, ripped the Maryland athletic department Friday, describing it as “a dysfunctional viper pit” defined by “political gamesmanship, internal backbiting...
Remember All Those Other Times The <i>National Enquirer</i> Squashed Scandals For Powerful People?
The New York Times reported yesterday that David Pecker, chairman of American Media Inc., which publishes the National Enquirer, has been granted immunity by the federal prosecutors investigating whether the president funneled hush money to women with whom he had affairs. Here’s how that worked, acc...