rio Page 284 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Wes Welker Gets Hair Transplant, Hair Transplant Reported By Associated Press For Some Reason
It's not even the weirdness of the AP treating Wes Welker's hair transplant as news:...
Rob Gronkowski: Offical Zubaz Spokesman
It was only a matter of time, wasn't it? Rob Gronkowski, who has been seen wearing the quintessential early nineties fashion disasters and little else this off-season, is now officially promoting the Magic Eye and cotton sweatpants....
Say Hello To Offensive Coordinator Brett Favre
According to a pair of reports out of Mississippi, Brett Favre is expected to soon be named offensive coordinator for Oak Grove High School in Hattiesburg. It's not yet official, but the school board will meet on Monday night, Favre will meet with the Warriors' head coach within the next week....
Porn Star (And Official Gronk Friend) Bibi Jones Emotionally Announces Her Retirement
Two days ago, we learned that the Patriots were requesting that all things Gronktastic kindly come down a notch or 10. Now, we get word that 20-year-old porn star Bibi Jones, made famous by her now-infamous midseason pose with the Gronk himself last October, is bidding a tearful and emotional good...
English Soccer Having Another Dumb Racist Twitter Thing
When a student was jailed for racist tweets directed at Fabrice Muamba, it was an opportunity to discuss the British justice system and the perils of online anonymity. When John Terry was cleared of racially abusing Anton Ferdinand, it was an opportunity to quote a judge saying "cunt" about 72 times...
The Patriots Want Rob Gronkowski To Stop Being Rob Gronkowski
From the moment he hit the dance floor in the hours after the Super Bowl, we've loved everything about Rob Gronkowski's offseason. The last five months have been such a sweaty blur of shirtlessness and beer-stained Zubaz, we never really gave much thought to how The Gronk Show was being received by ...
Your Rob Gronkowski On The Cover Of "The Body Issue" Photoshop Roundup
Your twisted imaginations never let us down. Which is why we couldn't wait to see what you might do with this image of Rob Gronkowski on the cover of ESPN The Magazine's "The Body Issue." We put out the call on Tuesday, and this is the best of what you had to offer. Thanks, you guys....
Minor League Football Organization Bans Two Players For Life After On-Field Brawl
The Northern Elite Football League (not to be confused with minor league football competitor New England Football League) banned two players for life after a nasty brawl broke out in Eau Claire, Wisconsin between the Lake Superior Rage and Eau Claire Crush....
An Actor Explains Just How Bizarre Bob Kraft's Casting Video Was
We asked you last night for information about the bizarre audition tape Bob Kraft made with his girlfriend, Ricki Noel Lander. This morning, a reader (no, not Jon Hamm) wrote in to give us some sense about how audition tapes work in Hollywood:...
Here's Patriots Owner Bob Kraft Helping His Girlfriend With Some Kind Of Weird Audition
Well, this isn’t something we ever thought we’d see. Here’s 32-year-old occasional actress Ricki Noel Lander, better known around Boston as the close “pal” of Patriots owner Robert Kraft, and she appears to auditioning for the role of “Mary Elena” in something that requires her to be in a bikini....
Portland Man Running For Mayor, Punching Pick-Up Basketball Opponents In The Balls
I should clear something up. Democrat Jefferson Smith (pictured, right)* has denied punching any pick-up basketball opponent in the balls. His opponent yelled "You just punched me in the balls!" and Smith replied "I punched you in the thigh, not the balls." So, in the interest of fair and balanced c...
This Sure Looks Like Andris Biedrins Getting Oral Sex In The Back Seat Of A Car
Latvian news site Puaro has published a pair of photos showing what it claims to be Warriors center Andris Biedrins, on the receiving end of some public loving. The site is short on details, running only this short caption, helpfully butchered by Google Translate:...
The Grierson & Leitch July 4 Extravaganza: Movies That Made Us Love America
Today and yesterday, Grierson & Leitch honors America by spotlighting films that exemplify the best our country has to offer—and the worst. Yesterday: Movies that made us feel worse about America. Today: Movies that made us love this goddamned country. ...
Sorry, Mario Balotelli Didn't Really Make This German Fan Cry: How TV Lied To You During Euro 2012
In the 36th minute of the Euro 2012 semifinal, Mario Balotelli scored his second goal, a screamer to the top right corner. Balotelli ripped off his jersey and flexed, and the telecast cut to a woman in the stands, a German flag painted on her cheek, a single tear leaking from her eye....
Dontrelle Willis Retires. Mark Prior Tries To Make A Comeback. Baseball Remains A Sadistic Bastard.
Dontrelle Willis retired on Monday at the age of 30, bringing to an end one of the most baffling baseball careers of the past decade. The day before, Mark Prior, nursing an oblique strain, threw a bullpen session for the Pawtucket Red Sox. He hadn't pitched in a game since June 21, when he scuffled ...
Mario Balotelli Impregnates Person
Ninety or so minutes of soccer ago, Mario Balotelli was playing like the best player on the best team in the world. Now he's going to be a father. That's some consolation, right?...
Nick Johnson Keeps Alive Most Impressive Streak In Sports, Goes On DL
Orioles 1B/DH/ticking time bomb Nick Johnson left Wednesday's game after feeling pain in his right wrist, and after an MRI yesterday was placed on the 15-day DL. Finally! The season's nearly half-over, and we were getting worried that Johnson might finally, after 13 years in MLB, make it through a s...
Balotelli Wasn't The Only Super Mario In Attendance At Yesterday's Euro 2012 Match
It is not a stretch to suggest these gentlemen are actual plumbers, or if they have been in possession of mushrooms at one time or another. We're eagerly anticipating their appearance at Sunday's final; the Italians will need a fire flower or two to get past a tough Spanish defense. (Or one of thos...
Harrison Barnes Appears To Not Know How Baseball Caps Are Worn
Amateur drafts are kind of stupid from a wardrobe standpoint, as athletes wear the fanciest suits their agents will buy for them and then strap on a hideous team-related baseball cap as soon as the commissioner calls their name....
Mario Balotelli Singlehandedly Knocked Germany Out Of Euro 2012
Italy's Mario Balotelli scored two first-half goals that proved to be deciding in Italy's 2-1 dispatching of Germany in today's Euro 2012 semifinal in Warsaw....