rist Page 97 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bristolmetrics: <i>SportsCenter</i> Thinks You Can't Get Enough Of Roger Clemens
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenter throughout the week....

Cristiano Ronaldo Has A Sad
Oh noes! Ronaldo is "sad," and no one knows why. Not his teammates, not his bosses, and surely not the media, who have speculated that it could be anything from dissatisfaction with his contract to missing out on Player of the Year award to rifts in the locker room to the anniversary of his father's...

Brett Favre Doesn't Want To Say Whether Or Not That Was His Penis
Favre is back in football, serving as the offensive coordinator for a Hattiesburg high school. It's nice that he's keeping busy, especially as he isn't yet allowed to forget some of the nasty stuff that popped up during his stint with the Jets. No, not this woman. The other women....

Who Really Hits The Homers In <em>The Kid Who Only Hit Homers</em>? The Depressing Message Of Matt Christopher's Classic Book
Is The Kid Who Only Hit Homers a fable about the value of teamwork? Or is it a tale of using magic to get ahead, in which Babe Ruth is to Sylvester Coddmyer III as the devil is to Robert Johnson? The book, Matt Christopher's 1972 chef d'oeuvre, introduced the world to young Sylvester Coddmyer III, t...

Bristolmetrics: ESPN Loves Urban Meyer, And The Feeling Is Mutual
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenter throughout the week....

Why Did We Like Matt Christopher So Much? Introducing The Rebooted Deadspin Book Club
Sports has never been about, well, sports—at least not in fiction. Athleticism is moral worth. A slump is karma. Winning, losing: just metaphors. If the score's the only thing that matters, you might as well watch a real game....

Tony Stewart Trades Paint With Matt Kenseth, Gets Knocked Out, Hurls Helmet At Kenseth, Doesn't Give A Crap
Tony Stewart showed flashes of the personality that earned him the nickname "Smoke" tonight in the IRWIN Tools Night Race at Bristol when, after taking the lead from Matt Kenseth in the 332nd lap only to scape doors and find himself wrecked in the 333rd, let Kenseth know just how much he loved him...

Bristolmetrics: The Jets Are America's Team, According To Tebow-Horny <em>SportsCenter</em>
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenter throughout the week....

Bristolmetrics: <em>SportsCenter</em> Finally Discovers Mike Trout
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenter throughout the week. Graphic by Jim Cooke....

Ryan Hall Pulled Up Lame In The Men's Marathon
"Sure, God made the universe," Jake Mooney noted in this space back before the Olympics started, "but can he coach an American marathoner to Olympic gold?"...

Bristolmetrics: What Does <i>SportsCenter</i> Do When They Don't Have Olympic TV Rights? Tebow, Tebow, Tebow!
This is a regular feature breaking down, minute-by-minute, the content that appears on ESPN's 11 p.m. edition of SportsCenter throughout the week....

Jay Cutler Spawned
Jay Cutler and that one lady from that one reality show welcomed their first child into the world this morning. As reported by the one lady's Twitter account, Camden Jack Cutler entered the world as a healthy, seven-pound, nine-ounce baby boy. We assume that Bears fans are already complaining about ...

Bristolmetrics: Tiger All The Time
When last we met, Herm Edwards was pretending he was an NFL coach again, Jeremy Lin's Knicks departure dominated the news, and ESPN made a bunch of sick kids happy. What would this week bring?...

Superman, Drunk Girls, And <em>Life of Pi</em>: Let's Look At Some Movie Trailers!
In this installment of Trailer Hitch, our semi-regular rundown of the biggest recent movie trailers, I've got a superhero flick, a broad comedy, a couple Oscar contenders, and a dance movie. Who says Hollywood only caters to one type of audience? Also, I would love to meet the person who is really e...

Greek Olympian Banned For Racist Twitter Joke
If we learned anything from Euro 2012, it's that Euros can be casually racist on a stunning level. But how about some casual racism infecting the Olympic spirit? Greek triple jumper Voula Papachristou will not be going to London, just two days after a tweet that seems to have sent the whole nation i...

Bristolmetrics: Herm Edwards Loses His Grip On Reality
When last we met, Joe Paterno rescued SportsCenter from the wasteland that is July sports, and the ESPYs were surprisingly not hyped to death. What would this week bring? ...

Brits Placed First And Second At The Tour De France, Their Significant Others May Hate Each Other
Remember foul-mouthed Bradley Wiggins—the cyclist that called would-be steroid accusers "cunts" and "fucking wankers" a couple weeks ago while he was leading the Tour de France? Well, he ended up winning, becoming the first British person to do so in the race's history. He made no mention of wankers...

So, What Kind of Batman Movie Should They Make Next?
Whatever your thoughts end up being about The Dark Knight Rises—even if you're like me, say, and think it pales it comparison to the previous two films but still sorta blows you away—Christopher Nolan has wrapped up his trilogy in a fashion that clearly won't damage his legacy: This isn't Spider-Man...

The Steroids Era Was Just Like The Housing Bubble: How MLB Incentivized Widespread Fraud
Excerpted from Twilight of the Elites, available now wherever books are sold....

Bruce Wanes. <em>The Dark Knight Rises</em>, Reviewed.
1. The first two Batman films from director Christopher Nolan were so transcendent, so ambitious and challenging and grand, that The Dark Knight Rises feels like more of a disappointment than it should. The first two movies, especially The Dark Knight, were miracles, an impossible combination of uni...