rte Page 114 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Bengals' First Pick's Three-Part Fail: Fat, Injured, And A Bengal
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Jeremy Shockey Doesn't Play Well With Others
The Saints and Texans, bitter rivals from centuries past, got into a little intersquad donnybrook yesterday and America's second-most beloved tight-end was somewhere in the middle of it. Shocking, right? (Get it? 'Cause that's his name.)...
Words That Cris Carter Shouldn't Use During Live Television
me·shug·ge·neh (m-shg-n) or me·shug·ge·ner (-nr) adj. Crazy; senseless.n. One who is crazy. [ESPN/YouTube]...
Pittsburgh Steelers Love Their Illegal Gun-Shooting Parties (UPDATED)
Hackles have been raised by photos of a shooting event where civilians, including members of the Pittsburgh Steelers, are seen goofing off with possibly illegal weapons—all courtesy of the Pennsylvania State Police. Hey, gun safety is for Seahawks....
You May Be Taller, But You're Still Beneath Him
Mike Lupica's ego is to sportswriting what Milton Berle's cock is to comedy. It is an occupational totem, around which colleagues spin fantastical-seeming yarns that just so happen to be true. Here are a few such tales....
Jay Glazer Is Ready To Make Mortensen's 2009 NFL Season Miserable
Tough start of the week for Mort. First, ESPN takes away his Twitter freedom. And now he's back at training camp and dealing with this asshole again. Which week do you think Glazer TP's the Mort Mobile? [PFT]...
What I've Learned
"Just a reminder, Ben Cohen is Deadspin's summer intern," A.J. wrote in May. "His time at Deadspin... is part of his educational and life experience. So consider yourselves all mentors." Well, I thought then, this should be fairly catastrophic....
Sources: With Favre's Decision, ESPN Will Have To Turn Elsewhere For Worthless Scoops
One of the many tragedies of Brett Favre's non-unretirement is that Ed Werder and Chris Mortensen, ESPN's Woodward and Bernstein of the small-bore, will no longer be feverishly working their anonymous sources for the world's most trivial Favre scoops....
The First Sideline Reporter: "All Of This Was Just Nonsense"
The sideline reporter was young and attractive and more or less an open appeal to the lower enthusiasms of sports fans. The year was 1974. Jim Lampley was here to tell America about mascots and homecoming queens....
Okay, Perhaps Kellen Winslow Is A Soldier
We've all mocked Kellen Winslow in the past for grossly overestimating his own bravery. But perhaps it's time to reconsider, given that last year, he had his testicles sliced open....
Jason Whitlock Vs. Marty B In Racial Flame War ‘09: WHO YA GOT? (UPDATED)
Our favorite oozing pumpkin Jason Whitlock is forging an Enemies List not seen since the last days of Richard Nixon: Selena Roberts, Serena Williams, Hamstring Stretches, etc....
Police A Little Pissed At Newest Mariner
Seattle learns after trading for Dan Cortes that the top pitching prospect was busted earlier this month for public urination. He'll fit right in. [Seattle PI]...
Your Awkward And Vaguely Racist Video of the Day: Black Olympics
If you are a connoisseur of sophisticated social satire in the tradition of Mark Twain and Jonathan Swift, prepare yourself for Martellus Bennett's latest opus. It is entitled-simply, eloquently-Black Olympics....
Ron Artest Participates In Requisite LA Glamour Shot Session
I hope someone has the ones of him posing with a teddy bear and with his fist under his chin. [Yahoo!]...
Off The Wall, Indeed: Ron Artest Pays Tribute To Michael Jackson
"Michael, Michael, Michael, you my nigga. I know a thug would cry for you, my dude. Aint no R&B singer really ever makes me cry. Makes me wanna meet you, touch your hand. Ya know?" [YouTube]...
Artest and Kobe Do Their Best Work In The Shower
So how did trash-talking malcontent Ron Artest end up playing alongside "hated rival" Kobe Bryant in Los Angeles? It all started with a fateful shower stall run-in two years ago:...
In Other Former NFL Quarterback News...
Quincy Carter has been released by the Abilene Ruff Riders after he flaked out again.The team said he simply didn't show up and had no idea of his whereabouts. And he seemed so re-focused. [LewP]...
Hopefully, This Trade Will Result In Nightly Interactions Like This
Kobe and Artest: The 'Lost' Trash Talk from The Basketball Jones on Vimeo....
He's Not A Coffeenerd, But Trent Green Loves His Kids And Niagara Falls
"It's one thing to play football in front of 80,000 fans on Sundays, but it's quite another to write about it knowing 1.5 million of you are used to a pro like Peter King." [SI.com]...