rum Page 33 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Big Boy President Threw A Burger Party For His Football Pals
Here is the dream, as I imagine it: A bunch of football players are in the White House. Let’s just say they’re the 1985 Chicago Bears, and let’s further say that they’re doing The Super Bowl Shuffle for reasons that are not immediately apparent. We must say this because the dream is not mine—the dre...

Smooth-Brained Trump Lackey Finds Worst Possible Use For <i>NBA 2K19</i>
The latest iteration of the NBA 2K franchise allows players to design and customize their very own NBA arena. Nobody has put this feature to more depressing use than former White House communications staffer Steven Cheung:...

Trevor Lawrence Shoots Down Hilariously Fake Meme About Enraging The "Coastal Elite Media"<em></em>
Have you heard the news? Trevor Lawrence, who is an American patriot first and Clemson’s star quarterback second, has destroyed the coastal elite media. It started when those vicious thrashers pooh-poohed and criticized President Donald Trump for throwing the Clemson Tigers a fast food bacchanalia i...

Seriously, This Loser Gave Clemson French Fries In Little Presidential Cups
I was ready to move on from Donald Trump’s fast-food dinner for the title-winning Clemson Tigers’ White House visit yesterday, but these shots from AP photographer Susan Walsh are too good to pass by without comment. He had the fries put in cups with the presidential seal on them. Presidential fries...

This Dude Really Served Clemson Boxed-Up Fast Food On A Bunch Of Fancy Trays
Earlier today, President Donald Trump boasted about getting a bunch of fast food for the college football national champions, who were visiting the White House tonight, and he really did it! Take a gander at those carefully arranged sauce packets in a dish on top of a tray, for no reason....
![President Trump: I’m Going To Serve Fast Food Burgers And Pizza To The Clemson Football Team [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/zei4dddlhnao8er2hp9f.jpg)
President Trump: I’m Going To Serve Fast Food Burgers And Pizza To The Clemson Football Team [Update]
The Clemson Tigers, 15-0 and national champions, will make the traditional national championship team visit to the White House tonight. That this visit is happening during a government shutdown has rankled some, especially since not every team is even invited anymore. (Villanova didn’t get one. The ...

Could Trump Dodge A Shoe?
Today, we’re talking about fart ventriloquism, Street Fighter, Bernie the Avalanche mascot, and more....

How Did $5 Million Of Vince McMahon's Money Wind Up In The Trump Foundation?
On Tuesday, the New York State Attorney General’s Office announced that they had reached a settlement in their suit against the Donald J. Trump Foundation over its (prolific) self-dealing and other assorted misdeeds. Beyond the usual Trump-scented malfeasance in which the foundation engaged, one de...

Donald Trump Has To Give Up Autographed Tim Tebow Gear He Bought With Charity Money. Sad!
It’s entirely possible—and would have been merciful—if you briefly blacked out under the strain of constant Trump scandals unearthed during his presidential campaign, and missed this one. If so, it’s worth rectifying that: Few scandals so better display our president’s venality, his poor business ac...

How Did Donald Trump Propose?
Today, we’re talking about Trump’s marriage proposal technique, breakfast foods, Home Depot, cursing sports announcers, and more....

Red Sox Will Visit White House
Because this is now a legitimate question after every championship, it was news Monday night when the Boston Red Sox announced they have accepted an invitation to visit President Trump at the White House. When it is and who will attend are still up in the air—J.D. Martinez must be psyched, but you c...

UFC Is Streaming A Bizarre Donald Trump Propaganda Documentary
If parody is still possible, the opening montage is beyond parody. You’ve got your orchestral strings. An American flag. The ubiquitous name slapped on the back of a helicopter: TRUMP. Then Dana White in his traditional uniform, jeans and a black shirt with an extra button undone, lavishing praise....

This Shit Is Corny
You may have seen a quote from Giants star receiver Odell Beckham Jr. going around this morning, about the New York Giants’ chances of winning the rest of their games and making the playoffs at 9-7. “Six games left, it’s really only crazy until you do it,” Beckham told reporters, as if he were in a ...

This Is All Donald Trump Has Left
President Donald Trump often stands near a helicopter on the White House’s South Lawn while reporters shout questions at him. Certain elements of this ritual are the same every time. The wheedling honk of Trump’s voice and the uneasy tilt of his standing-on-a-hoverboard-for-the-first-time posture ar...

Remember When Donald Trump Asked If Pittsburgh Was Going To Bring Back Joe Paterno, Who Was Dead?
When Donald Trump is dropping remarkable word-turds every single day, some of them will inevitably be lost with the passage of time. In the last two weeks alone the Big Wet President has renamed a simpering fatberg “Beautiful Ted,” and he’s asked every man in an audience of 6,000 to raise his hand ...

Trump's New Attorney General Has A Wealth Of Sports Takes
Jeff Sessions resigned today as Attorney General of the United States at the request of Donald Trump. The Lilliputian bigot, a former Alabama Senator better known as The Keebler Elf But Racist, will be replaced for now by chief of staff at the Justice Department Matt Whitaker, a hulking bald Iowan w...
![Why Did NBC Air Trump's Racist Caravan Ad During <i>Sunday Night Football</i>? [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/esmyv7gi6skrkzos0iat.jpg)
Why Did NBC Air Trump's Racist Caravan Ad During <i>Sunday Night Football</i>? [Update]
During last night’s broadcast of Sunday Night Football on NBC, the network aired a political ad produced by the Trump administration which carried a message of gutter racism....

Joel Embiid Announces Plans To Expand His Real Estate Empire By Building Additional Housing Units In Andre Drummond's Cranium
Basketball star and no-rent housing innovator Joel Embiid had a monster game against the Pistons yesterday. And in his 39-point performance—32 of them coming in a scorching first half—Embiid achieved his twin goals of clowning on and growing his real estate investments with his favorite rival/unwitt...

NBA Admits Refs Were Suckered By Joel Embiid's Theatrics
Joel Embiid got Andre Drummond ejected during the final minute of regulation in Tuesday night’s eventual overtime Pistons win, by throwing himself on the floor like a big old goof after incidental contact with Drummond’s hand. The two behemoths have spent the hours since chirping at each other throu...

Joel Embiid And Andre Drummond Are Beefing, We Got Some Basketbeef Here
Philadelphia 76ers center Joel Embiid is a big fat out-of-shape butt and also a very fine television actor, according to Detroit Pistons center Andre Drummond. Let’s back up and make some sense of that....