scream Page 159 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Worst Punishment For Luis Suárez Is Forcing Him To Play Teenagers
The worst part of Luis Suárez's suspension for the player himself probably hasn't been the jokes about his cannibalistic supervillain image, nor missing out on the early parts of this promising Barcelona season, nor the weekly adulation from tens of thousands of fans he used to receive whenever he s...

FIFA's Independent Investigator Wants His Corruption Report Released
FIFA hired an outside investigator to conduct a probe into allegations of bribery in the bidding process for the Russia and Qatar World Cups. That investigator, a former U.S. federal prosecutor, has finally submitted his findings to FIFA with the expectation that they would eventually be released to...

Manchester United's Defenders Don't Actually Know How To Defend
Manchester United were supposed to play yesterday in England's League Cup. Instead, they were home chilling, because on August 26, they got curb stomped by third-division midtable side MK Dons. ...

Ghanaian Soccer Star Denies Rumors He Ritually Sacrificed Rapper Friend
In the second confrontation—the first involving kicking the shit out of a journalist for inquiring on the subject—of rumors that Asamoah Gyan had his old friend, the rapper Castro, ritually sacrificed to benefit his career, the Gyan family has released a long statement denying the allegations....

Liverpool Defeat Middlesbrough 14-13 On Penalties
Yes, the headline is accurate. Liverpool defeated Championship side Middlesbrough 14-13 on penalties Tuesday to advance to the fourth round of the League Cup. Liverpool took leads of 1-0 and 2-1 but were pegged back twice, the second time in the 123rd minute of play after Kolo Touré's ill-advised ta...

Greek Soccer Team's Manager Gets Way Too Turnt During Press Conference
If there was one thing you could say about Gennaro Gattuso, AC Milan's and Italy's fiery former leader, it was that the man was a lock for a manager job when he retired. If there was another thing you could say, it was that said managerial career would involve numerous public blow-ups like this....

Nathaniel Clyne's Walloping 35-Yard Goal Put Southampton Up On Arsenal
This probably isn't news to most of you, but if you want to know why this site is named "Screamer," it's because of goals like this. Nathaniel Clyne belted this thing so hard the ball probably started screaming, and we were screaming while watching it fly in. Hence: Screamer....

What We Talk About When We Say No One's Talking About Hope Solo
This piece originally ran at The Sport Spectacle....

One FIFA Executive Thinks Qatar Will Lose The 2022 World Cup
Everything about the 2022 World Cup in Qatar—from the scores of migrant workers who have died building stadiums and infrastructure, to the accusations of corruption, to the scorching heat that will make games unplayable—is shaping up to be a disaster. It is so bad that even one of the Bond-villain t...

Frank Lampard Scored A Fittingly Huge Goal Against Old Team Chelsea
The pillars of the old crew were all there. John Terry still in the captain's armband. A ponytailed Didier Drogba in his famous number 11. The boss José Mourinho, looking upon his charges sternly from the sideline, no doubt fighting back an inner smile. And Frank Lampard, a goal down, hungry to do...

Manchester United Dominate Leicester, End Up Getting Blown Out
You see that little guy up there? That's Filbert the Fox, Leicester City's mascot. Don't worry, he's feeling great. Though his club hosted the rich and famous Manchester United today, his boys managed to take down the giants. Those aren't tears of sadness, they're tears of mockery, directed at the...

The Premier League Needs More Bastards Like Diego Costa
It takes a certain type of person to start an argument with a person who can't even understand what they're saying. But with Chelsea leading 3-1 at Everton with a little over 20 minutes to play, a goal already to his name, that's what Diego Costa did....

Moritz Stoppelkamp Scores Longest Ever Bundesliga Goal
Down 0-1 to Bundesliga newcomers SC Paderborn 07 in second half stoppage time, Hannover 96 keeper Ron-Robert Zieler went forward for a last ditch free kick. That proved to be an unfortunate decision, as Paderborn midfielder Moritz Stoppelkamp cleared the ball 83 meters into Zieler's net. Stoppelka...

James Rodríguez Opens La Liga Account With Beautifully Struck Goal
Real Madrid president Florentino Pérez may not have any understanding of soccer tactics, but he does know flash when he sees it, and Colombian World Cup standout James Rodríguez is certainly flashy. With Madrid up 1-0 in today's game against Deportivo La Coruña, Rodríguez took a pass from Karim Be...

New Footage Proves Zlatan Ibrahimović Has Been Stuntin' Since Birth
Children sometimes have difficulty understanding the origins of God. How, if He was never born, did he emerge fully formed from nothing? Now, thanks to this previously unreleased footage of Zlatan Ibrahimović in his early years, we now have the perfect explanatory analogy....

Manchester United's Luke Shaw Is The Next Gareth Bale, Even If He's Not
This summer, Manchester United bought left back Luke Shaw from Southampton for £30 million. Luke Shaw is 19 years old. If you're not familiar with soccer's transfer fees, that is a staggering amount of money for a teenager. It's more than the fee paid for Wayne Rooney, another English talent of grea...

Apparently 1860 Munich Really Will Wear This Oktoberfest Kit In-Game
When I first saw this alleged 1860 Munich uniform, inspired by Oktoberfest and mimicking the Bavarian national costume, I thought it must be a joke. Gingham, collared shirts? Lederhosen? But it's real. And I think I kinda love it now....

This Russian Soccer Brawl Goes From 0 To 100 Real Quick
As more proof that there's nothing Russians don't think would be improved by spontaneous kickboxing bouts, here's a video of two youth soccer teams fucking each other up after only the slightest provocation....

Real Madrid President: I'm Stupid, Not Crooked
It's maybe a little disconcerting when the president of the richest club in the world—the brains behind all significant player transfers coming in and out, a man so determined to fulfill his dream of a star-studded lineup that he'll jettison the one player that makes his team work in favor of a bigg...

MLS's Clint Dempsey Raps Like MLS Plays Soccer (Like Shit)
This is EXCLUSIVE FOOTAGE of Clint Dempsey, American and major league soccer player, rapping at a video game's New York launch party last night. It is weird. ...