si Page 435 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Adam Thielen Tries Very Hard To Not Say Anything Mean About His Bad Quarterback
Vikings quarterback Kirk Cousins’s play through the first four games of this season has resembled his center’s pants after a few snaps. His biggest problem is that he struggles to throw a deep, accurate ball. Both the defense and his own receivers know it....
Vontaze Burfict Suspended For The Rest Of The Season For Attempted Decapitation Of Jack Doyle
Raiders linebacker Vontaze Burfict will be suspended for the remainder of the 2019 season for his flagrant late hit on Colts tight end Jack Doyle in Sunday’s game. Burfict was tossed during the second quarter of the Raiders’ 31-24 win after he teed off on a defenseless Doyle....
This Guy Truly Has No Idea What He's Talking About
It is a problem for President Donald Trump that it’s often impossible to tell what the hell he’s talking about. This is not one of those signature Trump defects that can readily be spun into a secret strength or as a subtle bit of advanced dealcraft that only experts and initiates can appreciate. H...
Columbia University Wipes Out Its Delightfully Chaotic Marching Band For Bullcrap Reasons
Sad, dispiriting news from the world of college marching bands: Columbia University effectively disbanded its wonderfully anarchic and mischievous marching band Wednesday, after years and years spent actively antagonizing the group and suppressing its creativity. The university communicated to the s...
John Harbaugh Is Doing Everything Right
There’s still a lot of season left, granted, but Ravens fans should be pleased with the way head coach John Harbaugh has been running things through three games. Baltimore has built an offense that seems perfectly suited to quarterback Lamar Jackson’s many gifts, and Harbaugh has shown an in-game ag...
Is Beer Money Sign Man Sorry For Old Racist Tweets?
It’s the question everyone has been asking today: Is beer money sign man sorry for old racist tweets? Well, thanks to a breaking report from ESPN, we can now confirm it with confidence: “Beer money sign man sorry for old racist tweets.” ...
Bernardo Silva Does A Racism Oopsie, Pep Guardiola Makes It Worse
What do you get when you mix an obscenely racist Spanish candy, a well-meaning but ill-advised joke tweet between Premier League teammates, and a manager who clearly doesn’t know anything about the history of racist imagery? Well, you get a racism scandal perfectly suited for 2019, with only a bag o...
Welcome To The Tomsula Index
For my money, there’s no better exercise during the NFL season than to look at the bottom of the standings in order to wonder, Would Jim Tomsula, right now, be better than that team’s head coach? ...
And Now, An Outrageous Throw From Mookie Betts
If you, like me, find yourself yearning for a throw that did not result in an interception tonight, I give you this Mookie Betts outfield assist from Boston’s game against Tampa Bay, which is so cool it should be illegal....
This Should Be Good: Russia Has To Explain How Positive Drug Tests Got Deleted From Its Doping Laboratory Data
Russia has three weeks to explain how positive drug test results were deleted from data sent to the World Anti-Doping Agency, which is still investigating Russia’s intricate years-long doping scheme that involving passing urine samples through a secret hole in a laboratory wall and got the country s...
Even In Defeat, Lamar Jackson Is Pretty Damn Special
For better and for worse, Lamar Jackson did not look like a regular NFL quarterback against the Chiefs on Sunday. First, the worse: Kansas City was able to regularly get pressure on the second-year player, forcing shaky throws on a consistent basis and often leading to overthrown deep balls, even wh...
Lions' No. 35 Unmasks Eagles' No. 26, Reveals Him To Be Miles Sanders
None of us can ever know the true identities of those who play in the NFL. Shrouded in armor—with helmets covering most of their faces, and jerseys that reveal merely half of their true names—American football players work in the shadows, anonymous to all but their closest friends and family members...
Charles Woodson Has Had Enough Of The Michigan Wolverines
Jim Harbaugh and the Wolverines had their asses handed to them in a 35-14 loss to Wisconsin on Saturday afternoon. Michigan was fresh off a bye, mercifully given two weeks to prepare for the Badgers and their scary-good running back Jonathan Taylor, and it went about as poorly as it could go. Michig...
The NBA's Dumb New Tampering Rules Are Rolling Out
So, this is silly: The NBA Board of Governors unanimously passed a stricter package of anti-tampering rules. Small-market teams scared of voracious big-market rivals, teams recently burned in free agency, and teams who just want to vote in lockstep so as not to look suspicious—whatever their varying...
Calvin Johnson: Lions Made Me "Change My Story" About Concussion
Calvin Johnson sat down for an interview with Sports Illustrated to discuss his NFL career and the reasons behind his early retirement from football. Johnson comes across as a guy who is very much at peace with how his career turned out, and who isn’t shy about revealing some of the uglier aspects o...
Kirk Cousins Isn’t Worth A Shit
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here. Buy his book here....
Malcolm Gladwell Goes On Bill Simmons's Podcast To Dust Off The Oldest, Dumbest Defense Of Joe Paterno
There’s no good reason to consider Malcolm Gladwell a serious writer or thinker anymore, thanks in large part to the things Gladwell continues to write and think. Despite this, he was allowed to write a new book—if you want to know more about it, I suggest clicking on this review in The Atlantic and...
Trevor Siemian Leaves Browns-Jets With Painful-Looking Ankle Injury
Shortly after Trevor Siemian threw a downfield pass to a receiver in triple-coverage, Browns defensive end Myles Garrett got a late hit on the quarterback that sent him crashing to the ground. While Garrett was flagged for roughing the passer, the outcome for Siemian was much worse as he was seen gr...
NBA Considers Raising Fine For Tampering To Four Times The Fine For Being Donald Sterling
Tampering is the gripe of the hour among NBA owners, which explains why the league’s board of governors will vote on new measures this coming Friday. “It’s pointless, at the end of the day, to have rules that we can’t enforce,” reads a quote by NBA commissioner Adam Silver in the middle of an ESPN s...
Mississippi State's Garrett Shrader Evolves Into Human Helicopter, Fails To Convert First Down
There aren’t a lot of options in most playbooks for a fourth-and-16 situation, but that didn’t get Mississippi State out of that exact scenario late in the fourth quarter against Kansas State on Saturday. After quarterback Garrett Shrader snapped the ball, and all of his receivers went running down ...