si Page 812 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About How Spectacularly Broke The Mets (And Their Owners) Are
Dan Lewis at Amazin' Avenue makes sense of the Mets' finances so you don't have to. Essentially, they're fucked independent of Bernie Madoff, and everything the team could conceivably sell is mortgaged. Makes you yearn for a couple months ago, when the team was a fuzz less fucked, but still fucked. ...
Not Fadeaway: Farewell To Brandon Roy's Perfect Step-Back
Brandon Roy retired from professional basketball last week, at the age of 27 and after just five seasons in the NBA. He has, he told the Portland Trail Blazers, "degenerative knees."...
The Ballad Of Dane Sanzenbacher And His Scrawny, White Friends
Pete Segall and our plucky friends at The Classical have a good story up today about Dane Sanzenbacher and the receiver's burden after one dropped pass in November: "It cannot be easy for Dane Sanzenbacher, and it's easy to imagine the hard thrumming pressure on him, the sensation of letting down th...
Women's Professional Soccer Escapes Extinction
For the past few months, we've been following the sad saga of one of the most destructive owners in professional sports, Dan Borislow, and his ongoing legal (and email) fight against one of the most beleaguered professional sports organizations in the world, Women's Professional Soccer....
LeBron James Wouldn't Let Walter Iooss Jr., Who Was Photographing Him For Nike, Speak Directly To Him
If you get a chance to pick up last week's Sports Illustrated issue without gagging at the cover, it's worth flipping through to Walter Iooss Jr.'s career retrospective. The photographer has been shooting athletes and swimsuit models for SI for 50 years, and it turns out that he's got as many wonder...
Mikhail Prokhorov Wants To Be The Next Russian Strongman
Mikhail Prokhorov promised to be a hands-on owner of the Nets, but that was before he committed to running a country of 142 million people. Prokhorov today announced he intends to run for President in next year's elections, challenging former President and current Prime Minister Vladimir Putin. No w...
How The Grinch Stole Christmas And Got Hit With A Soccer Ball Inside A Porta-Potty
I'm not confident that I understand the plot here, but just enjoy the never before seen mix of soccer trick shots and Christmas featuring UNC Asheville's Lassi Hurskainen....
"Unbelievable!" Indiana Beats #1 Kentucky On Buzzer-Beating Three-Pointer
On a day that already saw the #2 team in the country fall, the Indiana Hoosiers brought down top-ranked Kentucky on this buzzer-beating three-pointer that left Dick Vitale a puddly mess of screams and IU coach Tom Crean shaking his head in disbelief.[ESPN]...
It Took Real Madrid 25 Seconds To Score In <em>El Clásico</em>
A major blunder by Barça's Victor Valdes let Real Madrid's Karim Benzema sneak one into the goal as scoring in one of the most-anticipated matches in recent memory got underway less than a minute into the contest. [ESPN Deportes]...
Cockblocked By Peanut Butter Cups!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Artem Anisimov Breaks Out The Boomstick, Righteously Pisses Off The Lightning
After scoring his fifth goal of the season, a shorthanded tally in a tie game, Rangers center Artem Anisimov lowered the sights, pumped his stick, and let fly with one of the more demonstrative celebrations of the year. The Lightning took offense and swarmed Anisimov, setting off a penalty bonanza...
Colt McCoy's Father Says His Son Doesn't Remember The End Of Last Night's Game
This is what Colt McCoy looked like after James Harrison launched himself into McCoy's face with the crown of his helmet last night. It obviously wasn't a good idea for the Browns to put McCoy back into the game. But after only one play, they did just that. And five plays after Harrison's hit, McCo...
Kris Humphries's Worst Year Ever Culminates In "KRIS IS GAY!" Tabloid Cover
As the year-end lists filter in this month, remember this: Not many people have had a more humiliating year than NBA free agent Kris Humphries. A year ago, Humphries was known as a mediocre pro basketball player who came off a mediocre bench for the mediocre New Jersey Nets. Now, after a 72-day marr...
Shane Battier Announces He's Joining The Heat Via Jimmy Buffett Quote
If you were looking for a fresh reason to hate on the Miami Heat this year, Shane Battier's come through for you. The Grizzlies forward announced on Twitter this morning that he's joining the Heat. Somehow, a Jimmy Buffett reference made it into the mix. That alone almost makes this more damning tha...
Sidney Crosby Has To Miss Two Games Because Of This Hit
He's been back for just eight games since he ended his 10-month absence because of a concussion, but Sidney Crosby won't play tomorrow in Philly or Saturday at the Islanders, the Penguins have announced....
The Foolproof Way To Find Out How Many Women Wear Thongs
Your morning roundup for Dec. 7, the day we learned the alien search is back on. Photo via Fox DC. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Nebraska's Star Volleyball Player Gets Off Easy For Hitting A Motorcyclist While Driving Suspended
Considering that I've chronicled 2,119 hit-and-runs across the country since last January, the stories — to a certain extent — have stopped shocking me. That whole numbing-effect thing....
Weatherman Vowed To Wear Wife's Colts Panties If They Lost To The Patriots
Jim Kosek, an eager piece of on-air talent for AccuWeather in central Pennsylvania, apparently likes to start sentences with "Anyhoo." Which is especially rich when the sentence goes on to describe his wife's fandom for the Indianapolis Colts and how he'll wear her panties to work if they lost the...
Securities And Exchange Commission Investigating Marlins' Stadium Deal Because Of Fishy Accounting
We've written before about the deplorable public financing of stadium projects, and so we're excited to see the Miami Marlins' gleaming boondoggle face the SEC's federal scrutiny. Investigators have subpoenaed Marlins financial records and communications between Bud Selig and owner Jeffrey Loria, am...
Jeff Duckworth's Catch In The Big 10 Title Game Sparked A Gusgasm
Gus Johnson took some deserved criticism Friday night when he desperately tried to convince viewers UCLA still had a chance to upset Oregon late in the Ducks' 49-31 blowout of the Bruins, but fans of the spirited FOX announcer quickly came back on board when this Jeff Duckworth catch sparked one o...