si Page 831 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Watch Jose Reyes Bust Heavily Autotuned Reggaeton Rhymes With The Best Of 'Em
Jose Reyes is awesome at baseball—he bats .354/.398/.529 at the premier defensive position, and that's to say nothing of how exciting he is with a full head of steam, sliding into third after cracking one into the gap....

Now You Can Watch US Women's Coach Pia Sundhage Sing Her Groovy Tunes
We ran a short item this morning on the musical stylings of Pia Sundhage, coach of the US Women's National Team. She sings to keep her players in line. We're told Joe Paterno does the same thing with Tony Bennett standards....

Dook Sisters Go To Court Over Who's Dookier
The daughter of a Duke alumnus has filed a lawsuit against her sister, her brother-in-law, and Duke University for her inherited right to sit among these fine young men and women at Cameron Indoor Stadium all season long. Katina Dorton is seeking damages for the "fraudulent transfer" of two season t...

The Dangers Of Handjobs From Softball Players
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Mets Reliever Taylor Buchholz, On DL For Depression, Says He Felt Bad Crying To Another Man
Taylor Buchholz—who was actually decent in 26 relief innings for the Mets this year—is on the DL with depression. This is not altogether unusual: note Khalil Greene and Dontrelle Willis. What's unusual is the way Buchholz described his condition and the way AOL Patch explained his condition further....

Shaq Hired To Hang Out With Charles Barkley On A Regular Basis
Just six weeks into his retirement, Shaquille O'Neal has agreed to a multi-year deal with TNT to be a member of Inside the NBA. He'll join Charles Barkley, Kenny Smith, and Kenny Anderson Ernie Johnson in the cavernous studio next season, and because he is very weird — and as long as he doesn't encr...

Chelsea's Yossi Benayoun Shows Off A "Cheeky Finish" In A "Behind-Closed-Doors" Friendly Match
EPL powerhouse Chelsea played its first preseason match of the year yesterday. They did so against a woefully overmatched foe, the Wycombe Wanderers. Four minutes in, Yossi Benayoun fancied the ball into the net in a fashion that would stand out even at the end of the season. Good for Yossi. (H/T ...

Australian Netballer Suspended For Inappropriate Upskirt Touching
Per the Warnambool Standard, "A district league netballer has been given a two-week suspended sentence following allegations she made indecent contact up an opponent's skirt. The South West District Football Netball League (SWDFNL) has refused to name any of the parties involved or the circumstance...

James Harrison Probably Hates You, Too: More Quotes From The <em>Men's Journal</em> Article
When he was young, James Harrison used to shoot birds and squirrels in his yard. He also slept in the same bed as his parents until he was 12. These and other revelations come to us courtesy of Paul Solotaroff's profile of The Silverback Steeler in the August issue of Men's Journal, which hits newss...

Justin Timberlake At The All-Star Game: Drunk, Sarcastic, Drunk-Sarcastic, Or Just Obnoxious?
Justin Timberlake has redeemable qualities, doesn't he? He can sing and dance, he is a good SNL host, and he reportedly even has feelings. All this is more than we can say about Joe Buck. So no matter your opinion of the former boy band front-teen, he deserves some credit for agreeing to a live-br...

Deadspin Classic: And Now A Selection From Tim McCarver's <em>Great American Songbook</em>, Remixed
Tim McCarver spent the evening talking on your television. Now let him sing you to sleep. Originally published Nov. 13, 2009....

Here's Video Of A Ukrainian Goalkeeper Making What Has To Be The Worst Play Of His Career
In Ukrainian Premier League action yesterday, a Volyn Lutsk defender scored from roughly 45 yards out during a match against Kryvbas Krivyi Rih. He did so by passing the ball to his own goalkeeper, Vitaliy Nedilko, who had a difficult time of stopping it before it cost his side a 1-0 loss....

Jose Canseco Knows What He Wants And Is Not Afraid To Ask The World For It
Day Two of the latest Jose Canseco sad-clown meltdown saw him preaching from the mountaintop ("Be careful with woman who show off there tits and ass and think that's a career"), real-talking ("I will never forget or forgive what u said to me leila ur evil"), serving as the phone company's Green Pag...

Derek Jeter, Josh Hamilton, The Dodgers And Cliff Lee All Had Shining Moments Yesterday
Your morning roundup for July 10, the day it pays to be wary of people with wide faces....

In His Latest Meltdown, Jose Canseco Decided To Publicize His Girlfriend's Phone Number, Drug Of Choice
What started with Jose Canseco's Thursday announcement that "I am asking leila shennib to marry me .will you marry me" has somehow gone off the rails. Imagine that....

Concussed Cyclist Doesn't Remember Finishing Yesterday's Stage Of The Tour De France
Your morning roundup for July 9, the day Detroit teaches us to respect the crackheads who walk among us....

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To The Ballplayer's Twilight
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. In honor of Derek Jeter and his labored quest for 3,000 hits, here are well-told stories of ballplayers just before, in the years after, or at the exact moment they retired....

Cockblocked By Tyler Thigpen!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Dear Grantland: Your Motto Is Wrong
ESPN's Grantland still lacks a forum for comments and corrections, so we are providing this space to help the site's audience share its thoughts—criticism, praise, or otherwise. Comments below reflect the opinions of Grantland readers and are not necessarily the views of Deadspin. Readers who have a...
