si Page 895 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Extremely In-Depth Profiles In Courage: Larissa Riquelme (A.K.A. Paraguay Girl) (NSFW)
This is Larissa Riquelme. She's the cell phone-bosomed young woman the internet fell in love with on Monday. Currently, no one is blaming her for the Azzurri tying with Paraguay, but what do we really know about her? Pictures and (some) NSFW profile after the jump....

"Bros Icing Bros" Offs SELLS Itself (UPDATE)
Praise (or blame) Drew Magary for this outcome. UPDATE: VV scoundrel Foster Kamer is reporting that Bros Icing Bros was sold to some place. But not Bro Bible. Yeah. [BrosIcingBros]...

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 15th
Lots of good ones today. The Brazilian goals were nonchalant and North Korea — the Bad Korea — scored on The Selection on a really nice play. Top honors must go to New Zealand's Winston Reid for his stoppage-time equalizer....

Extremely In-Depth Profiles In Courage: Elizabeth Minett (A.K.A. Robert Green's Ex)
This is Elizabeth Minet. She's the ex-girlfriend of English goal keeper Robert Green and currently the scapegoat for the Cock-Up heard round the world. But what do we really know about her? Pictures and profile after the jump....

Trust A.C. Green For All Your Pepper Spray Needs
When you need a non-lethal defense system, don't settle for anything less than the non-lethal defense system that A.C. Green gives to the women in his life. For lethal defense, you should still talk to Delonte West. [YouTube]...

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 14
Lots of exciting goals today — Japan's Keisuke Honda scoring off of a nice cross and Italy's Daniele De Rossi off a corner kick especially — but let's look at all of them in a culturally insensitive manner....

Your Culturally Insensitive Weekend World Cup Goal Roundup (Video)
Last time around, we didn't have that many goals and thus only a few chances to express woeful ignorance about other countries' cultures. This time? Eleven goals over six games. So let's get stupid....

Annoying Use Of The Vuvuzela Throughout History: A Video Retrospective
By now you should be familiar with the vuvuzela, whose buzzing has become the unofficial anthem of the World Cup. Here's a compilation of great moments in history, film, and the internet that may or may not have been improved by vuvuzelas....

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup Of The Day (Video)
Two games today, two goals. Both of them in the first game. Bafana Bafana's Siphiwe Tshabalala knocked in a real beaut at the 55-minute mark, but Mexico's Rafael Marquez nailed the equalizer in the 79th. See, ties are fun....

Walking Boner: The Story Of A Boy Who Hit Puberty At Age 9
"Do not, under any circumstances, ever leave your son alone with a girl. There could be serious consequences. A big complicated embarrassing mess that could affect his whole life. And yours. He can get a girl pregnant. "[The Good Men Project]...

Private Stache: Brawling In The Stands At The 1986 World Cup
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

Deadspin Classic: The Tiny Plastic Horn That Will Ruin The World Cup
That terrible sound you'll be hearing over the next few weeks is the vuvuzela, which Dash described last year as "South Africa's answer to the Thunderstick." His story is below....

Boot To The Face! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Great Passing Sequence Reminds Everyone That Spain Is Pretty Good At Soccer
Spain defeated Poland in their final World Cup tuneup and the obvious highlight was this stunning series of passes that led to a David Silva goal, which officially put the rest of Group H on pants-crapping notice. [Business Insider]...

The Real Reasons No One Wants To Serve In The Armed Forces Anymore
I had a weird pain in my side the other day, and I'm now at the age where I assume any odd pain in my body is a sure sign of aggressive and malignant cancer. What the fuck is that pain? Is there a lump? It kinda feels swollen, especially compared to my other side. And it hurts if I poke it really ha...

Angry, Fan-Punching Mexican Wrestler Of The Week: This Guy
A luchadore's mask is very important. You can understand why La Parka punched this fan who tried to unmask him. After the fight, La Parka returned to his ancestral home: the cover of that one Offspring album. H/T The Masked Man....

Your First World Cup Conspiracy Theory: England-U.S.A.'s Crooked Ref
FIFA just announced their first batch of World Cup referee assignments and because everyone assumes everyone else is out to screw them, it's a great excuse to make preemptive excuses for why your team is about to lose....

The Epitome of Douche: "Bros Icing Bros"
I went to a wedding this weekend and saw at least three bros (BRAH!) get iced. This retarded game needs to stop immediately. Right fucking now....

Would You Like To Read Rich Eisen's Flirty Emails?
If anyone still remembers the "Sexy Newslady Sends Bikini Photos To Rich Eisen" saga, some emails between Eisen and Alycia Lane have been revealed in court. They're pretty tame, but remember, he was married and old people are boring. [NYDailyNews]...

Private Stache: Cassius Clay Has Blood On His Hands
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....