si Page 904 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Olbermann Joins The Sports Fella Pile-On
On Simmons: "I am again left to marvel how somebody can rise to a fairly prominent media position with no discernible insight or talent, save for an apparent ability to mix up a vast bowl of word salad very quickly."...

TRAPPED IN A CAGE! Great Moments In Drunken Hookup Failure
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase five heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go. But first, an announcement....

Slipping And Tripping In Warren Sapp's Hometown
You're familiar with Dark Side of the Locker Room. Consider this the THX Edition of Dark Side. Our storyteller is Padgett Powell, author of Edisto, The Interrogative Mood, and the following dispatch from Plymouth, Fla., which was spiked by ESPN....

Civic-Minded Wrestler Of The Week: Tiger Jeet Singh
There's a minor controversy brewing in Ontario, where trustees have voted to name a public school after longtime wrestler Tiger Jeet Singh. Why all the fuss? It's not like he attacked audience members with his sword that many times....

Sports Fella Doubles Down On The Stupid
Remember that foolish thing Bill Simmons said the other day about Tiger and Muhammad Ali? Well, Bill has taken a step back, read some old Sports Illustrateds, and decided to be foolish again, only at much greater length. [Charles Pierce]...

Dead Wrestler Of The Week: "The Big Boss Man" Ray Traylor
Every week, the Masked Man, Deadspin's pro wrestling correspondent, honors the sport's fallen and examines their legacies — famous and obscure alike. Today: "The Big Boss Man" Ray Traylor, who died of a heart attack in 2004. He was 42....

Time To Start A Band Since We've Already Got A Kickass Album Cover
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

It's A Whole New NFL (Or At Least A New Art Department)
I hope you like change, because the NFL sure does. The Lamar Hunt and George Halas trophies have been redesigned — some would say emasculated — but that's far from the only new look we find scary and different....

They Would Vie For Mr. Irrelevant In Dave Chappelle's Racial Draft
Three L.A. teachers were suspended for giving kids photos of O.J. Simpson and Dennis Rodman to carry in a Black History Month parade. Among the alternatives suggested by the district: Kobe Bryant. I have made none of this up. [AP]...

Beat Writer Continues Nationals Coverage, Sans Newspaper
Just because the Washington Times fired their entire sports section, Mark Zuckerman isn't going to stop doing his job. For someone to cover the Nationals voluntarily, I'm not sure it's going too far to call him a modern day Jesus....

Last Night's Winner: Hoc-key?
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like hockey-crazed Americans, so jazzed by Olympic fever that they set NHL records for attendance and ratings....if only they knew what channel the game was on....

Wizards, Donuts, Knives, And Cannibalistic Fruits
Boner from Growing Pains committed suicide last week, and that left me sad. More important, it made me remember that I used to watch that show religiously, and spent a great deal of my childhood imaging that I was Mike Seaver. There was one episode where Carol brings home some new friend: a smoking ...

Last Night's Winner: Jay Leno
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Lindsey Vonn, who continued her streak of tape delayed wipeouts by appearing as a guest on the new, new Tonight Show with....ugh, Jay Leno....

Erin Andrews Becomes A Star Who Someone Will Dance With
"Dancing With The Stars" announced that its lineup for next season will include America's Sideline Princess, because apparently all you have to do is ask and they'll let you on. It's a pretty good system ABC's got going on there....

Tim Tebow At The Combine: A Revelation, Set To Iron Maiden
As you know, Tebow impressed at the NFL Scouting Combine, running the three-cone drill in a hell-blazing 6.66 seconds. (It's the second coming! Of Mike Alstott!) Here's video of Tebow's big day, set to Iron Maiden's "Number of the Beast."...

Russians Also Not Shy About Winning, Threatening Olympic Bureaucrats
Russia is taking a page out of the Canadian playbook by making it clear that they intend to dominate Sochi in 2014. They're also taking a page out of the Soviet playbook by issuing ominous warnings to their own people....

Canada Wins, But So Do You
Well, shit. How are you feeling? Gut punched? Broken? Just wanting to go to sleep and never wake up? Embrace it. It's a wonderful thing....

Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch: Antichrist Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence - quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose - that the Florida quarterback is the Beast....

Utah Will Never Play In a Championship Bowl Game, How to Win an NCAA Pool, and Other Swell Advice from a Departing Gawker Writer
Hello Deadspin readers! My name's Foster. This is my last weekend writing for Gawker. I've written for you jockstrap-sniffing cretins before, but this will be maybe my last chance to do so. So while AJ's over there, here're some words:...

Sports Fella Leaves The Yard
OK, what in the name of Ho Chi Minh is Bill Simmons talking about here? Muhammad Ali and 'Nam? Tiger keeping his pecker out of the killing fields of Spearmint Rhino? What?...