soccer Page 115 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Gyasi Zardes Lowlight Reel Is Very Rude And Very Funny
United States forward Gyasi Zardes has quickly established himself as one of Jürgen Klinsmann’s favorite attackers, racking up five goals and 26 caps in his first two years with the national team. He’s a perfectly fine runner and finisher, but good lord, his first touch looks like he’s playing socce...

James Rodríguez Might Fuck Around And Win The Copa América By Himself
Because this 100 year anniversary version of the Copa América hosted in the U.S. is widely understood as the made-up, money-scrounging ruse that it is, there are only a select few teams that have both the talent and the motivation to go out and win the thing....

The USMNT Is Getting Hot At Exactly The Right Time
After the USMNT lost 2-0 to Colombia last Friday, Jürgen Klinsmann was as optimistic as any coach will ever be after a scoreless tournament-opening loss. He told reporters he was “absolutely okay” with how his team played, and even said, “There was no difference besides the two goals.” While the exp...

U.S. Soccer Boss Hints Trump Presidency Could Cost U.S. The World Cup
Donald Trump—one of the gremlins from Gremlins, but racist—is most likely going to be the nominee of the Republican party. As outlandish as his political takes are, and as favored as his likely opponent is, there’s a legit shot he becomes the next president of the United States. One effect of a Trum...

The USMNT Needs To Go Young Or Die
The United States Men’s National Team will open the Copa America Centenario—a wonderfully entertaining Frankentournament that the U.S. is hosting only through sheer force of corruption—with a match against Colombia tonight in Santa Clara, Calif. Colombia is the shit. They could have taken down Brazi...

Judge Rules USWNT Must Abide By No-Strike Clause
A federal judge ruled Friday that the United States Women’s National Team is bound by a no-strike clause, ruling out the possibility of a strike before or during the upcoming Rio Olympics....

FIFA Reveals $80 Million In Probably Illegal Payments, Headquarters Raided Again
FIFA headquarters in Zurich, Switzerland, were raided yesterday by police, as they sought evidence that former top FIFA officials Sepp Blatter, Jerome Valcke, Markus Kattner illegally awarded themselves $80 million in pay raises and bonuses, AP reports. Blatter and Valcke were previously banned from...

David Alaba Scored Just The Dumbest Own Goal
Transitioning from a bunch of Champions League games and a cup final to a relatively placid friendly against Malta can be a shock to the system. Rarely, however, does it result in such a hilarious, dumb own goal, like the one Bayern Munich star David Alaba scored on his own team this afternoon....

Good God, Look At What Dimitri Payet's Done This Time
Reigning king of the free kick Dimitri Payet showed off his craft again today in a friendly against Cameroon, delivering France the victory with this screamer....


Mike Francesa Is Very Annoyed That <i>Sports Illustrated</i> Put Lionel Messi On Its Cover
If Mike Francesa’s visceral disdain for soccer didn’t come through clear enough when he stumbled his way through a simple MLS ad read last week, today’s rant aimed at SI for their decision to dedicate the mag’s cover to Lionel Messi and a big portion of its coverage (specifically, as Mike discovers:...

Own Goals Don't Get Much Unluckier Than This
Pachuca took a 1-0 lead on León in Liga MX action tonight thanks to a catastrophic act of attempted defending that resulted in either a very unlucky, or very crooked, autogol....

Supporters Clashed In The Streets Before The Red Bulls-New York City FC Match
This blurry, cargo-shorted gentleman striking a come at me, bro pose amid a crowd of soccer fans and police outside Yankee Stadium? He’s your mascot for a bunch of chest-puffery and general ass-showing before the Red Bulls and New York City FC played in the Bronx today....

Manchester United Win The FA Cup, Once Again Dashing Crystal Palace's Dreams
There was a full two minutes back there—three, practically—when Crystal Palace looked as if it might pull off the greatest victory in its 110-year history. Having been outplayed till then in the FA Cup, Joel Ward put in a sort of cross just as midfielder Jason Puncheon sprinted beyond the pack. Punc...

"Pandemonium" As Hibernian Wins First Scottish Cup In 114 Years
David Gray’s 92nd-minute header pushed Hibernian to a 3-2 win over Rangers and delivered the north Edinburgh club its first Scottish Cup trophy since 1902—sparking madness at Hampden Park as fans stormed the pitch....

God Save The Pop Singer Hired To Perform FA Cup Final National Anthem And Didn't
British pop singer Karen Harding had one job before today’s FA Cup Final at Wembley: to sing “God Save The Queen.” It didn’t work out so well for her—having missed her cue, she stood silently for most of the anthem before finally chiming in for the final few words. At least those are the most import...

Angry Italian Soccer Guys Slap The Shit Out Of A Referee
Sure, it has to suck to lose a promotion playoff match thanks to a penalty given a minute before the final whistle, as was the case when Isolese lost to Sciarborasca earlier this month in Italy’s eighth division. But going psycho on the ref like this isn’t the right response, either:...

Sevilla Are The Kings Of Europa Once Again
For the third straight year, and fifth time in 11 years, Sevilla have played in and won the Europa League final, defeating Liverpool 3-1. Next season they’ll take their deserved place in the Champions League, and hope to never return....

Daniel Sturridge Scores Ridiculous Outside-Foot Curler
The Europa League final between Liverpool and Sevilla was a taut, back-and-forth affair, until Liverpool striker Daniel Sturridge broke the game open in the 35th minute with this beautiful strike. Make sure you stick around for the behind-the-goal angle that shows just how much curl the outside of S...

Here Are All 36 Goals From Gonzalo Higuaín's Amazing, Record-Breaking Season
As inarguably great as Gonzalo Higuaín has been for the better part of a decade now, he tends to be overlooked when it comes time to rhapsodize about the great pure strikers in the world. But after the season he just put together at Napoli, scoring 36 goals in 35 matches and thus breaking Serie A’s ...