soccer Page 142 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Marco Reus Fined $670,000 For Driving Without A License
German paper Bild reports (paywall) that Borussia Dortmund star Marco Reus has been fined €540,000 after police discovered he had been driving without a license for the past three years. Apparently Reus received five speeding tickets during that time, but somehow police never figured out that he a...
Who Will Develop The First Great American Soccer Star?
For as far as soccer—the official Sport Of The Future on these shores for decades now—has come in America, we still haven't hit upon a sustainable youth development model to cultivate all levels of professional talent, from squad-fillers to superstars. This leaves interested parties at home and abro...
Tim Howard Retracts Book Claim That Brad Friedel Tried To Sabotage Him
Tim Howard has announced that he will alter future editions of his just-published book, in response to Brad Friedel's complaint that the book unfairly and inaccurately claims that Friedel attempted to block Howard's move to the Premier League. This decade-old goalkeeper feud still burns brightly, ap...
UVA Wins NCAA Men's Soccer Championship On Penalties
No. 16 Virginia beat No. 2 UCLA on penalties today after the Bruins clanged two straight shots off the same inch of crossbar. It's UVa's seventh NCAA men's soccer championship. Here are the nine penalties, mostly notable for the dopey versions of PK celebrations from the kids. ...
Giroud Is A Wizard
Sure, Olivier Giroud is unmarked, but that's a marvelous angle....
Soccer Player Struck By Lightning, Thought Dead, Says He Survived
Joao Contreras Fuentes is either one lucky son of a bitch or tops on God's shit list, take your pick. He was playing soccer for the club Sport Aguila in the Copa Peru when a bolt of lighting leaped from Zeus' fingertip and basically erased Fuentes in the fashion of blowing out a candle. The bolt ign...
Joey Barton Received A Death Threat From An Angry Frenchman
On Twitter today, veteran QPR midfielder Joey Barton dug up a a death threat from last year, during his loan to Marseille. It's violent!...
Goat Wants To Be Club's New Goalkeeper; Mean Greeks Cut Short His Tryout
Look, maybe trying out for the team mid-match shows some bad timing on the goat’s part, but let my man at least try to make a couple saves. His positioning looks impeccable, and forwards are going to think twice before challenging for balls in the air knowing horns like that are aimed at their ribca...
This Is The Soccer Flop To End All Soccer Flops
Leeds United took on Derby County over the weekend, and that's not at all interesting except for the fact that the game gave us a truly glorious flop....
Violence Erupts At Jalisco Stadium After Monterrey Knocks Off Atlas
Atlas and Monterrey supporters clashed with each other and police following tonight's 2-0 Monterrey win that moved Los Rayados into the Liga MX playoff semifinals. Univision Deportes reported multiple police suffered injuries, while others formed a protective shield around Monterrey supporters to pr...
Kevin Mirallas's Beautiful Curling Goal Was Right Out Of A Video Game
After a well-cleared cross from a free kick near the box, Everton's Kevin Mirallas collected the ball and crushed this shot, bending it perfectly into the far corner of Tottenham's goal. You can almost feel how hard he was squeezing the finesse shot button....
Argentine Soccer Broadcaster Is A Rollercoaster Of Emotions
Make sure you have turned YouTube's closed captioning on, and then watch this glorious video of an Argentine second division match from February. When Talleres de Córdoba scores in the 89th minute, the homer broadcaster sings a lyrical description straight out of Galeano (well, not quite). When Almi...
Manchester City's Messiah Sergio Agüero Pulls Another Resurrection Act
Twenty minutes into Manchester City's crucial home Champions League match against Bayern Munich on Tuesday, it looked like everything had broken right for the English champions. Earlier in the day, in the other matchup in City's group, Roma somehow contrived to draw a game they really should've won,...
Watch Messi Break The All-Time La Liga Scoring Record
Lionel Messi became the top scorer in La Liga history with this 72nd minute goal against Sevilla, his second of the game. It was Messi's 252nd league goal, which topped Athletic Bilbao legend Telmo Zarra's 251, who did most of his damage in the 1940s. A few minutes later Messi got his hat trick, s...
Why Is This Small Man Attempting To Assault Me?
It appears Jack Wilshere never learned the old "the bigger they come, they harder they fall" adage....
Here's Wayne Rooney's Cute Little Son Doing A Cute Little Cartwheel
After his second goal in the England-Scotland match earlier this week, Wayne Rooney celebrated by doing a cartwheel. Today, he revealed the inspiration behind the move by posting an Instagram video of his son Kai's favorite new move:...
Zinedine Zidane No Longer Has To Pretend Not To Coach Team He Coaches
A couple months ago, we told you about how Zinedine Zidane, manager of Real Madrid Castilla, was under investigation for not having the proper coaching qualifications. The Frenchman had two ways to fight the impending punishment: either cadge up the qualifications or deny that he was actually the ma...
Xabi Alonso Forced To Apologize To Ronaldo For Stupid, Fake Controversy
Remember that dumb story Real Madrid pitched to their stooges at Marca yesterday, where some milquetoast statements of Xabi Alonso's were folded, kneaded, and ultimately transformed into direct insults to former teammates Cristiano Ronaldo and Iker Casillas? Well, it worked....
Shitty Swiss Team Cuts 11 Players After Youth Team Blows Them Out 10-0
FC Grenchen, of Switzerland's fourth division, suck at soccer. In their last nine matches, they've collected all of zero points while shipping 66—yes, 66—goals, 10 of which came at the feet of FC Luzern's youth squad. Following that horrific result, Grenchen's sporting director decided to cut 11 pla...