sports Page 813 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Witness The Last Gasp Of Local News Reporting As It Repeatedly Hits On St. Louis Cardinal David Freese
Here is World Series MVP David Freese being subjected to quite possibly the most uncomfortably awkward fluff piece ever. Six Flags has a Mr. Freeze roller coaster and Show Me St. Louis' Julie Tristan decided it would be the perfect excuse to continually hit on the young Cardinal. She even brought i...
Luis Suarez Finished A Hat Trick With An Unbelievably Stupid Shot From Just Past Midfield
Liverpool striker and alleged racist Luis Suarez capped off a hat trick against Norwich City today with a ridiculous, stupid strike from 45 yards out. We use the words "ridiculous" and "stupid" here unironically. For him to take this shot with an nearly open pitch in front of him (and teammate St...
Derrick Rose Injured In Final Minutes Of Game 1 Win Over Philadelphia 76ers
For some reason, Derrick Rose was on the court for the Chicago Bulls with a 12-point lead and a little more than a minute left in the series opener against the Sixers. Driving to the basket, he planted awkwardly and almost immediately fell out of midair in pain. Chicago would go on to win the batt...
Tim McCarver Blames Global Warming For The Increase In Major League Home Runs
We'd normally save this sort of thing for McCarve'd Up (which will be back next week after being pre-empted for NFL draft coverage) but Tim McCarver said one of the stupidest things ever spoken on a television broadcast today, blaming global warming for "making the air thin" and thus leading to a...
Jeff Francoeur Gets 100th Assist Off Ryan "Doormat" Line Drive
We're not sure if someone has got it in for Ryan Doumit over at Yahoo, but as you can see, a typo (??) credits Jeff Francoeur with his 100th assist after doubling up Joe Mauer on "Ryan Doormat's liner to right-center."...
Reports: Matt Leinart To Sign With Oakland Raiders
Look out Bay Area, here comes the party (and lifetime 57.6 completion percentage). Friend of the program, Matt Leinart is ready to move on from his backup role in Houston to a new backup role with the Oakland Raiders. According to Adam Schefter, Leinart will sign with the Raiders and immediately be...
Rich Eisen Went Berserk When The Jaguars Drafted A Punter
The Jacksonville Jaguars stupidly picked punter Bryan Anger in the third round last night, a pick that shocked experts and Jags fans alike....
Jeremy Guthrie on 15-Day Disabled List Because He Is A Bicycle-Riding Hippie
Jeremy Guthrie, who may have more in common with Arlo than previously thought, will "miss a couple starts" according to Rockies' manager Jim Tracy with some right AC joint pain....
Scott Hairston Hits For Cycle, Mets Get Clobbered
Scott Hairston did that cool and meaningless thing where a player gets all the different kinds of hits possible in one game. Sadly, it was not a "natural" cycle, an even more meaningless occurrence made remarkable by the order in which the hits are made. The Mets, on the other hand, did that uncool...
Russell Wilson's Wife Provides Us With Our Favorite Face Of The Draft
Seattle chose quarterback Russell Wilson in the third round of last night's NFL Draft, and his wife of three months was so excited she immediately began the metamorphosis to boa constrictor....
Mohamed Sanu Drafted By The Cincinnati Bengals, No Seriously—The Bengals Drafted Him Friday Night
The Rutgers wide receiver was projected to go in the second or third round, and after a prank call pump fake on day one, he actually did go in the third round to the team he thought picked him in the first round....
Here's Umpire Jeff Kellogg Tackling A Streaker At Tonight's A's-Orioles Game [UPDATE]
Jeff Kellogg was behind the plate for tonight's A's-Orioles game, when during the Seventh Inning Stretch a shirtless fan came onto the field and (painfully, we imagine) slid headfirst into home plate....
Joel Ward Doesn't Blame Boston For Racist Comments
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Nobody should be blaming an entire city or fanbase....
Feeling Goodell: Who Hugged The NFL Commissioner Longest At Last Night's Draft?
NFL commissioner and disciplinary hardass Roger Goodell has ushered in the Draft Day Hug Era, eschewing the usual handshake photo-ops in favor of giving in to those players who want to give him the bro treatment. Goodell has embraced the embrace to such an extent that it's become the norm. Every pl...
This Is The Face Of A Hockey Player
Veteran Panthers center John Madden took friendly fire in the first period of last night's Game 7 matchup with New Jersey last night, leaving bits of himself on the ice and suffering the sort of injury that generally knocks most other athletes out of competition. Most other athletes, of course, are...
And Here's The Long-Awaited Unveiling Of Robert Griffin III's Socks
"Go catch your dreams," says RG3, though to his receivers "your dreams" means "my passes."(Click "Expand" for a closer look.)...
Asante Samuel: There Are "A Lot Of Sad Eagles Fans Over There"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Samuel says a lot of people can't figure out what went wrong in Philly last year....
NFL Network's Draft Coverage Is Already Hitting Some Technical Snags
In an age of exclusive broadcast contracts, choice in television viewership is a rarity for live sports programming. The NFL Draft is the most prominent remaining event for which viewers can choose—in this case, between ESPN and the NFL Network. The latter's going all-out to try and grab a bigger...
Javy Guerra Took A Line Drive To The Face, Stayed In The Game, Blew The Save
Dodgers closer Javy Guerra blew his second save of the season last night against the Atlanta Braves after a line drive rocketed off his jaw in the ninth inning. At the time, there was one on and one out; manager Don Mattingly left the righty in the game after Guerra assured him that he was fine, o...
Suns Fans Celebrate The Career Of Steve Nash With A Giant Drawing Of A Penis
Steve Nash becomes an unrestricted free agent this offseason, and since the Suns didn't qualify for the playoffs, his offseason essentially started last night. Suns fans came out to lament his departure (or beg him to stay) including at least one who decided the occasion called for a display of a g...