st Page 1161 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

"Megatron's Butthole" To Remain Clenched
When we last checked in on the progress of the Atlanta Falcons’ new stadium, which features an eight-petal retractable roof known as “Megatron’s Butthole,” things were stopped up. The Atlanta Journal Constitution brings us an update today, and it looks like the hole will remain closed for some time....

Pacific Crest Trail Association Axes New Logo After Realizing It Contained Supposed “Boy Lover” Symbol
The Pacific Crest Trail is a 2,659-mile long trail passing through the Cascade and Sierra mountains in California, Oregon and Washington. It’s a National Scenic Trail, and part of the Triple Crown of Hiking. It looks beautiful. Plus, per Wikipedia: “The chances of meeting your spouse on a backpackin...

Daley Blind Is Okay Posting This Image On His Social Channels With The Following Copy
Manchester United player Daley Blind wants you to know that he’s ready for the next match, and also that he’s not very good at copying and pasting. ...

Here Is A Very Silly And Satisfying Home Run
Jose Canseco’s off-the-head home run will always be a great baseball lowlight, but I think Reno Aces right fielder Zach Borenstein has him beat....

Chelsea Prospect Sent Home After Insulting China
Brazilian winger Kenedy has been a promising young player in Chelsea’s system for a few years now, but after a disappointing, limited 2016-17 campaign, he would have been hoping to make an impact during the club’s preseason tour of Asia....

Cowboys Rookie Jourdan Lewis Found Not Guilty Of Domestic Violence
Cowboys rookie cornerback Jourdan Lewis was found not guilty today of domestic violence by a jury in Ann Arbor, Mich. Lewis had been accused of dragging his then-girlfriend across the floor, then putting his hands around her neck after a fight about bills earlier this year. The four women and two me...

Deadspin Up All Night: That's What It Came To
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Let’s go....

Duane Brown's Holdout Is A Test
Duane Brown is testing the system. Brown, who is about to enter his 10th season as the Texans’ starting left tackle, has not reported for the start of training camp. He has two non-guaranteed years remaining on his contract, and he wants a new deal....

Man Suing Draymond Green: "I Still Feel His Hand On My Jaw"<em></em>
Last July, Golden State lightning rod Draymond Green was arrested for assault and battery for allegedly striking former Michigan State football player Jermaine Edmondson in East Lansing, Michigan. At the time, Green settled this affair by paying the city $560 for a noise violation. Today, however, E...

Sixers Fans Simply Decided The Sixers Are Good Now, And It Worked
I remember it well. I was 16, right at the start of my senior year of high school, and my friends and I drove down to Veterans Stadium to watch the Phillies play the Reds. It may actually have been the first time I went to a Phillies game unaccompanied by my elders. ...

Report: Yu Darvish Is Officially For Sale
Rangers ace Yu Darvish is 30 years old, will be a free agent after this season, and is pitching at the high level he always does when healthy for a team that’s lost more than it’s won, all of which has made him a pretty obvious candidate to get moved before this month’s trade deadline. Now, accordin...

Penn State's Hard-Hitting Kicker Leaves Program
Penn State kicker Joey Julius, arguably the greatest tackling kicker of his generation, is no longer with the Nittany Lions. ...

Phil Mushnick Is Being A Crotchety Old Penis Again
It’s the Dead Zone of the summer sports calendar, and I am on the verge of dying from physiological lack of hot sports action. Thankfully, there is man out there who the IRON NUTSACK to throw down the kind of C4-tipped bazooka take that can carry you and I through the purgatory of late July. That ma...

Suddenly, Jose Altuve Is The Best Player In Baseball
It’s not really a shock, given that Astros second baseman Jose Altuve finished last season with 6.7 WAR and has been putting up ridiculous statistics for years now, but the little guy is currently your MVP frontrunner....

Don't Look Now, But The Yankees Might Be Interested In Giancarlo Stanton
Giancarlo Stanton was definitely thinking home run. In a rare visit to the Rangers, one of the few ballparks the Marlins slugger hasn’t homered in, Stanton realized this might be his last chance for a while to notch it on his belt. (Well, his last chance for a while unless he becomes a Yankee soon. ...

Stephen A. Smith's "Sources" Tell Him LeBron James Wants To Beat Kyrie Irving's Ass<em></em>
Stephen A. Smith is back from a brief vacation from his radio show, and, boy, is he back. With a claim from some anonymous sources that LeBron James would be tempted to beat Kyrie Irving’s ass were they in the same room. ...

Chris Froome's Next Race Will Be Against History
There hasn’t been genuine last-week intrigue about who would win any Tour de France since 2011, when Cadel Evans took the yellow jersey from Andy Schleck on the penultimate day of the race. Schleck gouged Evans and the rest of the field for minutes on Stage 18's summit finish atop the Col du Galibie...

Deadspin Up All Night: This Is The Worst Trip I've Ever Been On
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Red Sox Admit That WEEI Hosts Say Some Shitty Things
WEEI is where to go to hear Boston Red Sox games on the radio. It’s been that way for most years since 1995, and it will continue to be that way through 2023. Despite the partnership, the team can still acknowledge that the radio station encourages some terrible people....

Maester Qyburn's Big Anti-Dragon Crossbow Looks Stupid
Game of Thrones—HBO’s hit show about camping and horny sailors—has made it very clear that the trio of dragons possessed by Daenerys Targaryen are Westeros’s ultimate weapons of destruction. She’s torched one proud city with them already, and the only reason King’s Landing didn’t go up in flames on...