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![If You Haven't Been Paying Attention, West Virginia's Geno Smith Is Having An Insane Year [UPDATE: Now With Geno Smith Ineptitude GIF]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/182xyfmaie6rwjpg.jpg)
If You Haven't Been Paying Attention, West Virginia's Geno Smith Is Having An Insane Year [UPDATE: Now With Geno Smith Ineptitude GIF]
Geno Smith leads the FBS in quarterback rating by more than twenty points. He's third in passing yards total (and, as of this afternoon, has played in a game less than either of those ahead of him, who he'll surely surpass), and his completion percentage leads the FBS by four points, despite throwin...

This Week's Signs Of The Apocalypse
For nearly two decades, Sports Illustrated has stirred the tea leaves to discern a weekly Sign of the Apocalypse. Deadspin salutes the magazine's ongoing effort to cover the end of times but declines to cede the scoop on the biggest event in world history....

Excerpts From The Recent USADA Report That Make Lance Armstrong Look Like An Asshole
On Wednesday, the United States Anti-Doping Agency released hundreds of pages of allegations against Lance Armstrong purporting to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that Armstrong not only doped, but organized a doping ring. The question of whether or not Lance Armstrong used PEDs is basically settle...

Your Week 7 College Football Master Schedule
Schedule and broadcasters via and cross-referenced with. If you spot any errors, let us know below. Conferences reflect home teams. Ranked teams bold; rankings from the USA Today Coaches Poll. Times (EST)....

How To Make French Toast: A Guide For People Who Are Not Insane
Let's make French toast!...

Several Fights Broke Out And A Man Was Stabbed During The First Syracuse Basketball Practice Of The Season
Orange Madness, the Syracuse version of the Midnight Madness events that take place all over the country on the first day of basketball practices, devolved into chaos around the periphery of the Carrier Dome last night. Syracuse security told reporters that multiple scuffles broke out around concess...

OK, Seriously, What The Hell Just Happened: The Cardinals Are Headed To The NLCS
Let's set aside the fact that the Nationals had the best record in baseball this year and the fact that the Cardinals had the worst record of any playoff team, because neither of those is the fundamental reason we ask this question: what the hell just happened? The Cardinals—the Pujols-less Cardina...

Deadspin's College Football Top 25 Or So: Race To The Bottom
It's time for a new installment of Deadspin's college football rankings. As always, the teams are ranked according to the logic and values of college football, no matter how bizarre or contradictory they may be. ...

Justin Verlander And Kate Upton Are A "Good-Looking Pair," According To Justin Verlander's Grandfather
Say, did you hear the rumor that Tigers ace Justin Verlander is dating supermodel Kate Upton? Exciting stuff, no? Well, Celebuzz says it's true, and that "multiple family members"—Verlander's and Upton's grandfathers, to be exact—"have confirmed it."...

Your Orioles-Yankees And Nationals-Cardinals Open Thread
Get excited! We've got two elimination games slated for today, as both series have come down to a Game 5. Will the Orioles continue their unlikely run through the postseason? Will Natitude prevail? Will Alex Rodriguez overdose on sleeping pills in the dugout?...

Even If Icing The Kicker Doesn't Work, It's Better Than Never Icing The Kicker
Mike Tomlin iced the kicker twice last night, but with an unfortunate twist: First, he called a timeout on his own kicker, Shaun Suisham, who proceeded to miss a 54-yarder. Then he stopped the Titans' Rob Bironas just as he was about to attempt the game-winning 40-yarder. Bironas waited two minutes ...

Hey Fitness Freaks, We’re Giving Away a Garmin Forerunner 10
For those strange beings who are motivated by things beyond candy corn-flavored Oreos and watching game highlights, today is your lucky day....

Bud Selig's New, Random Postseason Knows The Soul Of Baseball Better Than You Think
Out of the 22 playoff games in the first two rounds of the MLB playoffs, 12 have featured at least one team on the brink of elimination, and six of those will have been sudden death for both teams. Bud Selig's new postseason format puts a lot more weight on single games, which has led many players, ...

<em>Friday Night Lights</em> Creator Tells Mitt Romney To Stop Using His Slogan
The internet loves a few things more than the regular population does. Chief among them are animated GIFs, pornography, and scripted NBC shows. But the internet does not love Mitt Romney. So when Romney co-opted the motivational cry of Friday Night Lights's Dillon Panthers, the internet smelled cyni...

A Major Match-Fixing Scandal Is Rocking French Handball
Handball: it's not just a sport to watch on CNBC at 7:45 a.m. in early August every four years. Apparently there are leagues and teams, and those teams play important games, on which people bet money. Not very much, though, as Stefan Fatsis explains, on this week's excerpt from Slate's Hang Up and L...

Bengals Cheerleader Who Humped High School Student: "We Still Haven't Been On Our First Date Yet"
Now that all that messy business of sleeping with one of her former students is behind her, Sarah Jones and that former student are ready to consummate their relationship, perhaps by having dinner and seeing a movie....

Once Upon A Time, The Jets Were Willing To Bench Mark Sanchez
Drew Stanton was a Jet for all of a week. He signed to be the backup to Mark Sanchez, but other events intervened. Peyton Manning decided on the Broncos, so Tim Tebow became expendable. The Jets traded for Tebow, at a not-insignificant cost in both draft pick and money, and Stanton was the odd man o...

Here's One Of The Best Beano Cook Stories
A lot of great stories about the late Beano Cook have been making the rounds this week, but there may be none better than this one, which originally appeared in the Sept. 1, 1982, issue of Sports Illustrated:...

The Marlins Asked Fans To Share Their Favorite Memories From This Season. It Went About How You'd Expect.
Yesterday, the Miami Marlins posted the lovely photo you see above on the team's Facebook page....

Listen To A Dallas Radio Host And A <em>Baltimore Sun</em> Reporter Call Each Other Names Because Of Tony Romo
Remember when Tony Romo hung up on Baltimore reporters but really didn't? Well, now you have to, because it's still a story. A story that involves even more HOT AUDIO....