st Page 1932 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here Are The Best Entries In Our Drunk, Sulking Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest
This fine entry kicked off our Patrick Kane photoshop contest, but somehow we knew our wise readers had more in store. And you did not disappoint. I've picked the best ones here—with special commendation for our winner at the end—because we can cram only so many images into a gallery, but keep in mi...
The USFL Is Making A Comeback, Will Be Nothing Like The Old USFL
The United States Football League is apparently being reborn next March, with teams in eight cities playing a 14-game schedule through June 2013. Not everything is cemented yet, including which cities will actually get franchises, but the effort has attracted some noteworthy investors and advisors, ...
Everything You Need To Know About Sarah Phillips, Former ESPN Columnist And Social-Media Scammer
Last week, we published a long story about Sarah Phillips, the ESPN columnist who, among other things, used her connections to the Worldwide Leader to hijack a teenager's Facebook venture. The story developed quickly from there, getting progressively more complicated as more tipsters came forward wi...
Thunder PA Announcer Arrested And Fired After He Allegedly Forced Kids To Watch Him Masturbate
Jim Miller, the public address announcer for Oklahoma City Thunder games, was arrested yesterday and charged with three felony counts of lewd or indecent acts with a child under 16. The Thunder announced shortly thereafter that they had fired Miller....
What Josh Beckett Does On His Off Days Stays Between Josh Beckett And His Off Days
After apparently solving things a few weeks ago, the Red Sox have (thankfully) returned to aggressive catastrophe status. They're 2-8 in their last 10 games, including an 8-3 thrashing yesterday at the hands of the Cleveland Indians. Josh Beckett gave up seven runs in a little more than two innings,...
It Was "Anal Kid Time" At Yankee Stadium Tonight
Reader Tommy went to tonight's Rays-Yanks game in the Bronx tonight, and noticed the captioning board was advertising a very strange event. If you ask me, they're making baseball stadiums way too kid-friendly these days....
Minnesota Legislature Votes To Hand Over $800 Million So Shitty Football Team Can Build Shitty New Stadium
After several failed proposals and years of threats to relocate, it looks like the Vikings will be staying in Minnesota. The state Senate today passed a bill that would make way for a $975 million stadium, with the Vikings owners kicking in $50 million—a whole $50 million!—more than they had been sa...
A Tour Of Sports' Least-Coveted Auction Items
Do you want a game-used rake from Cleveland Municipal Stadium? No? Are you sure? It could be yours. (Really, it could be. It's a nice thing to have.) Josh Levin explains how, and lists other excellent bits of memorabilia you might acquire, on this week's excerpt from Slate's Hang Up and Listen pod...
Miami Heat Apologize For "Extinguishing" Amar'e Stoudamire
This is what happens when an otherwise personality-less P.A. announcer tries to show a bit of personality. The Miami Heat have now formally apologized for "extinguishing" Amar'e Stoudamire after his sixth foul last night....
Oil Can Boyd Calls Wade Boggs A Racist; Boggs Responds By Calling Boyd "A Delusional Drug Addict"
Dennis "Oil Can" Boyd and Wade Boggs were Red Sox teammates for eight seasons in the 1980s. It's safe to say they're not friends. Last Friday, Boyd appeared on "The Dennis & Callahan Morning Show" on WEEI in Boston to discuss topics ranging from growing up poor in the South to his drug use to his re...
MLB Plans To Ban That Stupid Fake-To-Third, Throw-To-First Pickoff Move
Every baseball game seems to feature at least one of those useless, dilatory fake-to-third, throw-to-first pickoff moves. They never work, they slow down the game, they make you wait even longer for your team's terrible righty middle reliever to give up the lead. Who likes this thing enough to keep ...
Orioles Employ Extra Security In Futile Attempt To End Streaking Epidemic
The second-place Orioles have had just enough of your streaking ways, citizens of Baltimore. You had your fun on April 6, what with your Batman-inspired impostor, a.k.a. 26-year-old truck driver Mark Harvey, who was later permanently banned for life from the stadium....
Reconstructing Patrick Kane's Drunken Weekend In Madison, With Eyewitness Testimony
On Monday we showed you photos of a soused Patrick Kane in Madison, Wis., and then we asked you if you knew more about what happened while Kane was there. We had heard some bad stories—that Kane supposedly choked a woman, that Kane supposedly said anti-Semitic things—and we wanted to know if other p...
Sun Shines On The Dog's Ass That Is Stephen A. Smith, As Technical Glitch Renders Him Unable To Hear Skip Bayless
Readers send us tips about ESPN2 offal vomitorium First Take regularly, but we're loath to provide the program any more attention than it already has (and, valuing our sanity, avoid watching it ourselves). So we thank Sports Illustrated's Richard Deitsch for the head's up on this brief technical g...
After Amar'e Stoudemire Fouled Out, He Was Gonna Help Shane Battier Up, But ... Nah
Last night, we showed you how the Heat's PA guy made a corny reference to Stoudemire being "extinguished from the game" when he fouled out. But this video shows you what happens at the end of that clip, when Amar'e decides to lend a helping hand before he doesn't....
The Heat PA Guy Announced Amar'e Stoudemire Fouling Out As "He Has Been Extinguished From The Game"
Ha! Ha! Get it? Because he severely injured his hand punching a fire extinguisher! You're winning friends the right way, Miami Heat. (We isolated the arena audio track so you can hear it more easily.) [TNT]...
CBC's Ron MacLean Attempts Tortured Comparison Of Hockey Players To 9/11 First Responders, Fails
CBC host Ron MacLean opened tonight's coverage of the Stanley Cup playoff Game Six bout between the Capitals and Rangers with an extended and tortuous metaphor claiming the players were "like firefighters, like police officers," and throwing in 9/11 references....
Before Steve Kerr Sends 19-Year-Old Players Back To College, He Should Try Some Academic Research Himself
Former NBA star Steve Kerr penned a lengthy, multi-sectioned argument in Grantland this week in which he not only defends the NBA's current ban on players under age 19 but pushes for the minimum age to be raised to 20. Forcing young people to spend more time as scholar-athletes, according to Kerr, ...
Another Mike Leach Book Inscription: "Anybody But Craig James For Senator"
Last night, we showed you the personalized message Washington State football coach Mike Leach left when autographing a copy of his book for a fan, which referenced the possibility that Craig James killed five hookers while at SMU....
Fenway Park Public Address Announcer Killed In Car Accident
Sad news out of Boston this afternoon as police have announced that Carl Beane, the public address announcer at Fenway Park since 2003, was killed earlier today in a one-car crash in Sturbridge. He was 59 years old....