st Page 2209 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Be Good For Goodness Sake
According to well-placed sources in NORAD, Santa is making his way across Asia right about now, which must mean that I'm about 18 hours from stuffing my face in Chinese food. Oh, and Christmas is almost here. Merriness ensues....

Ray Allen Is Having Some Issues With Twitter
Followers of Ray Allen's Twitter account must have been shocked by the sudden X-rated turn that his tweets took last night—a brief, masturbation-filled snafu that he blames on hackers....

More Last Minute Gift Ideas: A Murder Conviction
A Yankee fan who ran over a Red Sox fan with her car after he mocked her team has been found guilty of second-degree murder. Shockingly, the New England jury did not consider it justifiable homicide....

Tiger Woods Accident Story Becomes Latest Email Hoax Your Dad Will Send You
Many of you have probably received a forward from a friend-of-a-friend who knows an Isleworth resident with the "real" story about how Elin and Tiger's Thanksgiving night battle went down. Here's what the bullshit story looks like....

Last Night's Winner: Pointless Tradition
In sports, every one is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Utah Utes, who have won nine consecutive bowl games....every single one of them completely meaningless. We must preserve this hallowed system....

Pretty Boy/Pac-Man Doping Mindgames Go Both Ways
Pacquiao's camp proposed a $10 million payment if either fighter flunks a drug test; Mayweather's people refused. At this point, they can both take horse Viagra for all I care, as long as they shut up and fight. [Examiner]...

Last Minute Gift Ideas: Tim Legler's Holiday Sweater
What is it with the ESPN basketball analyst (and former La Salle Explorer! Alumni!) and drinking games? We already had photos of Legler and his team of chug-a-luggers getting shit-hammered. Now, he's Christmas beer-ponging. This man's a menace....

Getting The Kinks Out Of Marriage
So there's this plucky startup headed by NFL wives to "strengthen the relationships between pro athletes and their significant others." The debut party's favors include "adult toys" for the men; strip poles for the women may be forthcoming. Seriously. [CNBC]...

The Astrodome Would Make For A Lovely Stocking Stuffer
Still scavenging for Christmas gifts? Boy, do we have a miraculous idea for you: buy a washed-up stadium. They're on the going block! Only downside: You'll probably have to upgrade your tree. Shipping might be expensive, too. [WSJ]...

Bizarre Recruiting Hoax Fools None, Confuses All
A sad young man is accused of recruiting high school football players for East Carolina—a school he has no affiliation with and that has never heard of him. What could have been the point of this not-so-master plan?...

John Lackey's Wife Gets Her First, Uh... Taste Of Boston Nightlife
Krista Lackey has already scored her first mention in the Boston gossip pages after being spotted at a fancy restaurant—where one of Southie's finest puked on her fur coat. Pissah. [Boston Herald, via 3:10toJoba]...

Last Night's Winner: Shopping Malls
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the megasize temple of commerce that assaulted me with annoying children, terrible seasonal music and then took all my money. You win again, Christmas....

Who Knew Greg Oden's Magical Exploding Kneecap Was Contagious?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

'Double Crown' Just Doesn't Have The Same Ring To It
The New York Racing Association says it's running low on cash, and might have to close their three tracks. That would mean no Belmont Park. And that would mean no Belmont Stakes....

Mayweather Laughably Implies Pacquiao Is Doping
The press releases we get are usually worthless, but sometimes they are news in themselves. Like this one we just got, in which Floyd Mayweather's camp not-so-subtly accuses Pac-Man of ingesting something stronger than power pellets....

Yankees Hope To Revive Glory Days Of The First Half Of The 2004 ALCS
Javier Vazquez's last start for the New York Yankees left the franchise flying pretty darn high. Everything after that was a bit of a blur, but why not give it another whirl? Watch your hands, because this is a HOTFUCKINGSTOVE!...

The Best <i>Best American Sports Writing</i> Of The Decade
Before the regrettable bulk of sports writing became sportswriting and the Internet emerged as the medium to document the worst of it, one book, every year, nobly set out to chronicle sports writing's best....

White Advocate To Integrate MLB Dies
You know Jackie Robinson and Branch Rickey, but maybe not Lester Rodney, the sportswriter who campaigned to break baseball's color line from the august pages of The Daily Worker, the U.S. Communist Party's rag. He died Sunday at 98. [Olbermann]...

Last Night's Winner: Tyreke Evans' Shorts
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Sacramento Kings, who showed up two-and-a-half quarters late (like the fans at a Miami Heat game) and still managed to pull out a win....
