tea Page 61 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We Need A New "America's Team"
Today, we’re talking about shoelaces, Trump’s hair, insomnia, Philly sports fans, and more....

Dan Snyder Doesn't Get It
Was this it, finally? Was this the utter embarrassment needed for Dan Snyder, who has owned an NFL team for 20 years and watched it descend over that time from the ranks of the league’s proud/storied/whatever franchises into a permanent laughingstock—over which time the one constant has been Snyder ...

Dwayne Harris Is A Special-Teams Genius
In the NFL, if a player on the punting team touches the ball first before it lands in the end zone, a player on the return team can scoop it up and advance it without worrying about a fumble; the turnover wouldn’t count against them. Raiders return man Dwayne Harris is quite familiar with this rule,...

Skins Cut D.J. Swearinger After He's Honest About The Team's Crummy Defensive Coordinator
As the Eagles snuck by the Texans on a last-second field goal, what was spiritually official a month ago became actually official: The Skins can’t make the playoffs. Surely the team will fit a lot of infighting into the season’s final week. It’s already started by the release of a Pro Bowl player on...

Sweet, The NBA Season Is About To Start
Every sports league is too long, but each is too long in its own specific way. The NFL’s mirrors the sport’s true nature as a weekly television show; Major League Baseball can make a half-convincing case for those multiple months of deeply meaningless games in its middle as part of its broader summe...

Frank Solich Still Has Some Tricks Up His Sleeve
We are thick in the middle of the most hilariously named bowl games, and while Wednesday’s Frisco Bowl can’t compete on that front with this, the day before, or this, the day after, perhaps we can take some solace in the fact that until last year the Frisco Bowl was the Miami Beach Bowl, meaning all...

Reports: Dan Snyder Is Conspiring With Congressional Republicans And The White House To Screw D.C. Residents
Eventually Dan Snyder is going to get around to demanding public money for a new stadium for his crappy team, and brother, when he gets there, it’s going to be huge. But between now and then he has to figure out which plot of land in which municipality will become the site of his obscene moat-encirc...

Can Seattle's NHL Team Recapture Vegas's Magic?
Seattle was officially awarded the 32nd NHL franchise last week, the culmination of a years-long process that absolutely everyone knew was leading to exactly this outcome. The announcement came one year to the day after Seattle voted to upgrade KeyArena, at which point the NHL’s decision became a me...

Ass Team Of The Week: Washington Sucked Down A Doo-Doo Milkshake On Purpose
Not so long ago Washington was a boring football team that nevertheless appeared destined to play in precisely one playoff game, which all Americans could feel comfortable skipping. On Sunday, though, they found themselves down 40-0 to the Giants, a very bad team that was also playing without Odell ...

Reports: Alex Smith's Leg Surgery Led To Serious Infection
It’s been nearly two weeks since Washington quarterback Alex Smith had emergency surgery after breaking his tibia and fibula in a game against the Texans. Smith had his surgery on Nov. 18, and now it’s been revealed that complications from that surgery have left him fighting an infection and that he...

The NHL Is Coming To Seattle
Following a unanimous vote from the league’s board of governors on Tuesday morning, the NHL has approved an expansion franchise for the city of Seattle, set to play in a renovated KeyArena. According to TSN, the team will begin play in the 2021-22 season....

Afghanistan Football Federation Members Accused Of Sexually Abusing Women's National Team Players
The Guardian has a report today in which multiple figures involved in Afghanistan women’s soccer exposed what they say is a culture of abuse of the female national team’s players on the part of prominent male figures in the Afghanistan Football Federation. One former captain of the women’s team and ...

Ass Team Of The Week: Oh Yeah, The San Francisco 49ers Still Play Football
Every person that cares about NFL football was freed from having to pay any attention to the San Francisco 49ers at the moment quarterback Jimmy Garoppolo tore his ACL in Week 3. They briefly rose to notice when rookie quarterback Nick Mullens had a decent game on Thursday Night Football, but for th...

Deadspin Awards: Ass Team Of The Year
The Deadspin Awards will take place on Dec. 5, and you can come! We also need our readers to decide the winners of these prestigious honors. Today, we ask you to help us determine the answer to an important question: Who is the Ass Team of the Year?...

In Shocking Betrayal, Penn Basketball Ditches Cheesesteaks For Fish Burritos
The Penn men’s basketball team is 5-2 so far this year; freshman Michael Wang has been particularly impressive. Their losses are to Kansas State and Oregon State. The only blip this season so far is losing Ryan Betley for the season five minutes into the opening game. (Penn rallied to win at George ...

The American Outlaws Still Care About U.S. Soccer
On Oct. 10, 2017, the U.S. Men’s National Soccer Team suffered the most crushing defeat of its modern era: a 2-1 away loss to the tiny island nation Trinidad & Tobago which—coupled with simultaneous wins for Honduras and Panama—assured that in 2018 they’d be watching the World Cup from home for the ...

When Roger Federer Says "Jump," The Tennis World Says "How High? And Can We Pay You?"
French journeyman Julian Benneteau, who peaked at world No. 25 in 2014, retired from tennis this year, freeing him up get candid about how favors actually work on the professional tour. Tennis is hush-hush about its rampant conflicts of interest and less than transparent about the benefits afforded ...

Ass Team Of The Week: The Buccaneers Were Killed By Their Own Hot, Compressed Farts
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers lost 16-3 to Washington on Sunday, but just about every number save for the final score says the Bucs were the better team. They out-gained Washington in yards nearly two-to-one—it was 501 to 286 when the final whistle blew—and yards per play (7.5 to 5.2), and had nearly dou...

MLB Buys Astros' "We Were Only Taking Pictures Of Other Teams' Dugouts To Make Sure <i>They</i> Weren't Cheating" Defense
In the second-pettiest looming controversy of this postseason, Houston had been accused by both the Indians and Red Sox of having a man working for the Astros standing in the camera well, using a cell phone camera to capture images of their dugouts. MLB has come out swiftly and strongly on the matte...

Reports: Indians Warned Red Sox Of Astros Employee Who Took Photos Of Dugout In ALDS<em></em><em></em><em></em>
Major League Baseball is internally handling an incident from Game 1 of the American League Championship Series involving suspicious activity by a Houston Astros employee at Fenway Park, according to Alex Speier of The Boston Globe. According to the league’s investigation, the Astros employee engage...