the Page 1012 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Pistonmania Is Running Wild On The Magic!
The NBA Closer is written by Matt McHale, who is eagerly awaiting the Hawks-Celtics game. When he's not stenciling a green shamrock on his butt cheeks, he can be found holding Damon Wayans hostage at Basketbawful. Enjoy!...
BWI Isn't Just a Crappy Airport In Maryland
Cedric Benson, the oft-maligned running back of the Chicago Bears, was arrested last night by the Lower Colorado River Authority (the LAPD of southwest waterways) after being stopped for suspicion of boating while intoxicated. The 25 year-old was hosting between 12 and 15 guests on his 30-foot boat...
About Last Night
What you missed while setting New Orleans on fire... • NBA: For some reason the New Orleans Hornet attempted to jump through a ring of fire in between the first and second quarter. Once they put out the fire the Hornets couldn't be stopped. • Boxing: Oscar de la Hoya dispatched of Stevie Forbes with...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering if the new statue at Staples Center will sport fishnets... • Oscar de la Hoya vs. Steve Forbes. Check back in later tonight. [HBO] • The Detroit Pistons host the Orlando Magic in the first game of the NBA Playoff's second round. The first round should be wrapping up any...
They're Ready to Run For the Roses
The little people are mounting their steeds, which means the most exciting two minutes in sports (setting aside the final two minutes in almost all other highly contested sporting events) can't be far behind. Oh wait, they're playing "My Old(e?) Kentucky Home. This could take a while. Hey, an ex-boy...
For Your Afternoon Viewing Pleasure
• Her. • 3:00 — Golf: Wachovia Championship, Third Round. No Tiger, but a talented leaderboard nonetheless. [CBS] • 3:00 — Horses: Kentucky Derby. Post time is 6:00 pm. [NBC] • 3:00 — Horses: Live at the Derby. Every time I turn it on the dog starts barking. It's either the horses or Kenny Mayne's e...
Sacha Baron Cohen's New Guy Is Tall
Wait a minute, where did all of those Hawks fans come from?...
Your Derby Morning Horsey Preview
This may come as a surprise to some, given my affinity for sports nobody else likes, but I don't know dick about horse racing. That's why I've brought in reader Randy King to provide a little bit of knowledge while we wait to lose lots of money. His words are after the jump....
About Last Night
What you missed while wondering if Tim Donaghy was so bad after all... • NBA: The Cavs knocked the Wizards out of the playoffs, and I don't really want to talk about it right now. • Boxing: Andre Dirrell got his balls back, and remained undefeated, with a stylish stoppage over Anthony Hanshaw. More ...
And It's C-m Rocket In The Lead!
This weekend, those of you who are equine-obsessed or have an affinity for minty rum drinks and giant pink hats, will most likely have a rooting interest in the most exhilarating two minutes in sports, the Kentucky Derby. Right now, the favorite horse is a strapping young colt named "Big Brown", a n...
May Day! May Day! Detroit Is On Fire!
So May started out pretty well if you happen to live in the 3-1-3. Within the space of two hours, the Pistons dispatched the 76ers to go to Round Two of the NBA Playoffs, the Red Wings pummeled the Avalanche to sweep that series, and the Tigers ... well, the Tigers pulled off the greatest feat of a...
About Last Night
What you missed due to a slight preoccupation with porn ... • MLB: A.J. Burnett provides Canada some good news for a change. Blue Jays 3, Red Sox 0. • NBA: Kevin Durant wins NBA Rookie of the Year award. Seattle sues to keep trophy from moving to Oklahoma City. • NHL: Rangers postpone the inevitable...
Congrats, Sigh, To Uncle Avram
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....
Well, That Was A Fun Day
Let it be known that as enjoyable as it was to substitute "edit" Deadspin the day after all hell broke loose on HBO, it is not without its drawbacks. Like, for example, I have no idea what happened in any actual sports news today. But I do appreciate the tips, the opinions, the mash-ups, the well-wi...
Another One Of Clemens' Part-Time Ladies Strikes A Pose
This is Angela Moyers, real estate agent from Lemoyne, Pa., who also is rumored to have had an ongoing part-time humpathon with Roger Clemens while he was still married and being America's perfect family man....
Ronaldo's Big Tranny Adventure; The Next Day
So here's a photo of one of the "ladies" who had a run-in with AC Milan soccer star Ronaldo on Monday. Not a bad effort I suppose, but I wouldn't need the entire running time of The Crying Game to guess this secret, would you? New details of the magical evening have emerged, so after you have made t...
Lou Piniella's Balls Are Not Taking Questions Tonight
Being a sports reporter is, at times, an absolutely horrible job. Sure you get to watch games, travel and interact with athletes, but there is a horrendous downside. (Which is pretty much everything else.) And this is never more disturbingly clear than when a reporter has their first (or 50th) awful...
A USC Football Player Got A Low Test Score? What?
"If your Wonderlic score is lower than the age of consent in your state, you may be a redneck." I'm not all that convinced that IQ testing is all that relevant when it comes to drafting NFL quarterbacks, but I will say this: If I needed a partner to diffuse a bomb, I'd pick LSU Louisville quarterbac...
Corey Lynch Offers Divine Intervention To The Bengals
Marvin Lewis has the seemingly insurmountable task of changing the Bengals' from one of the most clink-happy and character-deprived football teams in league history to something ... better. Chris Henry is gone, but the scars still remain. The attitude and atmosphere has to change in 2008, so the Ben...