the Page 1044 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
We're Just Getting Started, If By "Started," You Mean "Halfway Done"
It was TheStarterWife who said things were totally different on this side of the wall, and all I can add to that is "ain't that the fucking truth." But we've learned a few things that we'll be sure to apply toward tomorrow's festivities. First of all, we realize that Nibbles really is a delicate fl...
With Your Boys, Talkin' S***. But You're Going Home Alone, Aren't'cha?
If there's a theme to Saturday nights, it's saying and doing things you regret on Sunday. Therefore, here follows a round-up of the various mealy-mouthed guarantees and guarded boasting that amounts to this week's "bulletin board material." You said you're confident in your team's chances of victory...
A Quick Thought On Fantasy Football (Take 2)
I am in four fantasy leagues this year. Last year I was in eight. I'm also the proud owner of two keeper leagues, in both of which I am commissioner. When someone asked me why I would willingly serve as such a glutton for punishment, I replied simply, "I would rather be the guy in charge."...
Hugh II: The Nedessey Continues... Part 1
On 2nd and goal w/ 20 seconds to go and one timeout, Marshall's head coach elects to center the ball and kick a FG rather than go for the touchdown. Who knew Pam Ward's vagina was contagious? -Insomniac's Lounge...
Just Wake Me When It's Over
September, of course, is when baseball approaches my favorite part of the season — the end. I have no genuine qualms with the game or its fans; in fact, I can think of few more enjoyable ways to spend a sunny weekend afternoon than taking in a Greenville Drive game and enjoying moderately-overpriced...
Parlay O' the Week
Amateur athletics and gambling go together like bacon and hot fudge. Each weekend I will share some of my valuable college football gambling wisdom with you, the reader. Just remember, most of said "wisdom" comes from years of losing ridiculously speculative bets; when you lose all your money don't ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while attempting to hibernate through Sunday morning. • CFB: Rutgers dispatched the Midshipmen 41-24. I wish the Marines had a football team, Ufford is the white Wes Welker.: • Boxing: Zab "Super Jew" Judah def. Edwin Vazquez in a unanimous decision. Zab survived an early headbutt th...
What Kind Of Sports Bar Societal Dregs Will You Encounter During Week 1?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Theo Epstein Is A Robot And Will Eventually Enslave Us All
In another chapter in our repeated quest to understand the quixotic planet of Red Sox Nation, we delve down the rabbit hole of the saga of Clay Buchholz....
Can One Courageous Squirrel Make A Difference In The NL Central?
When St. Louis Cardinals fans look back to identify the turning point in the 2007 season, they need go no further than Tuesday night. That's when one brave squirrel dared to make a difference, turning defeat into victory and giving wavering Busch Stadium fans a rallying point for this year, and all ...
It's The NFC South Pants Party
To the NFC South! We don't want to speak out of turn here, but we think the NFC South might be our least favorite division in football. There's the Saints — that's Kenny Chesney in that picture, of course — and then ... ugh....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while feeding your llama ... • MLB: Right back atcha ... Diamondbacks move back into virtual tie for first with Padres. Drama! • Tennis: Ferrer, not Federer, upsets Nadal at U.S. Open. • Gymnastics: Bend it like Horton ... lithe, flexible U.S. men qualify for Beijing Olympics....
Don't Even THINK Of Ranking Michigan In Your Top 25
Dan Shanoff writes a weekly college football column for Deadspin. Email him to let him know what you think....
About Last Night
What you missed after an extended weekend of light drinking ... • MLB: Vote For Pedro. Martinez returns, reaches milestone, Mets win. • Golf: Get your kicks, on Route 66 ... Mickelson defeats Tiger, now must rest for about two weeks. • College football: The Son Also Rises ... Clemson Tigers 24, Flor...
Women Are From Venus, Ivanovic's Are From Heaven
While it's always good to see Venus Williams healthy and playing at her peak I can't help but lament the loss of her opponent. Ana Ivanovic (previously featured for her sexiness in these parts by Dan Shanoff) was easily the sexiest creature remaining in the women's draw—although Rafael Nadal sure is...