the Page 1051 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights


A Bug's Life, If That Bug Is Named John Holmes
The world has long pined for the answer to life's perpetual mystery: Is a Rangers-Orioles game more boring than watching flies screw? Well, an astute reader and his friend attended such a baseball game last night, and saw two horseflies gettin' down and procreating. Judging by these two fans' fixat...

You've All Been Working For The Weekend
After The Mighty MJD's heartfelt goodbye last weekend — after more than a year of serving as our weekend editor — the speculation has been immense. (Really!) Who's gonna take over for MJD? Well, considering it's Friday, we should probably tell you....

What Will Be Cut From This Year's ESPY Awards?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

The Orem Owlz Medium Is The Message
For years, we have watched the totalitarian media/mind control tactics of the rookie-level Pioneer League team the Orem Owlz with a wary eye. They have sat there, in their megalomaniacal castle in Utah, acting as if they are the rulers of all the survey, wielding their power indiscriminately and wit...

Bad Day For Neshek
It was a bad day all around for Pat, who suffered his first loss last night. Fortunately, his beautiful designed Web site — not that we should talk — will keep updating, and even putting up these in-no-way-uncomfortable-to-watch videos. Next year, Pat. Next year....


The Only Time We're Going To Mention The ESPYs, Promise
Honestly, if you don't have ESPY fever, we don't know what's wrong with you. People have often commended ESPN for running the ESPYs during the All-Star Break, and we agree, though for likely different reasons: We, like you, find ourselves so into sports sometimes that it's helpful to have an event t...

It's Tough To Type While Wearing A Mitt
We don't have an iPhone, because we're quite happy with our iPod and our cellphone being happy and separate, thank you very much. (Also: A little pricey.) Most people we know who have one tend to enjoy them, but they've had a bit of an issue with the lack of a keyboard....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while dropping your pants and firing a rocket ... • MLB: Twins 6, Yankees 2. Happy birthday, George. • Tennis: Nadal beats Soderling at Wimbledon, and it only took 90 hours. • Golf: The Booz Allen Classic update you've been clamoring for....

Spencer Hawes Doesn't Think It's Getting Hot In Here
New Sacramento Kings center Spencer Hawes has heard your complaints about athletes not being political, about LeBron James refusing to speak out for those suffering in Darfur. He wants you to know that he will not kowtow to corporate interests. He speak truth to power. Particular in his college deba...

Please Do Not Protest Bonds In Sign Form
Now that San Francisco Chronicle reporters Mark Fainaru-Wada and Lance Williams aren't going to jail for their stories about Barry Bonds, they're getting awfully cocky: They're now exposing the Orwellian practice of shutting down anti-Bonds signs at baseball stadiums....

Danny Almonte's Big League Dreams
So this is sad: Danny Almonte, the onetime Little League World Series legend who turned out to be older than everyone had sad — and ended up marrying a woman 11 years his senior — is gonna need himself a new career....

Hey, Aramis Ramirez Hit A Home—YeeeeeOW!
The high-five being replaced with the prostate-massage ... long, long, overdue. But if this Cubs winning streaks goes much longer, I shudder to think of what's going to start happening in that dugout. Bat boys are going to have to be replaced with jizzmoppers....

To Watch Tonight...
• 7:00, TBS. MLB. Atlanta Braves @ Florida Marlins. You know what? I think Billy the Marlin is cute, and I won't apologize for it. • 7:00, ESPNU. Soccer. FIFA U-20 World Cup. Argentina vs. Czech Republic. The long-anticipated rematch of their one match back when ... I don't know, they've probably pl...

ESPN Would Like You To Know That Only Harold Reynolds Harasses People
Probably time to check in on that whole Woody Paige sexual harassment lawsuit business. Not that many new details have been released since yesterday, except that we've learned a bit more about Jay Crawford, amazingly. (Seriously, we didn't think they guy even knew how to read.) We did enjoy the foll...

Come Join Us At The Philly Pants Party
After a bit of a delay, we have the details for the next Deadspin Pants Party, to be held in Philadelphia on Saturday, July 14. It's all official and stuff: You can buy your tickets right here. Game starts at 3:55. We will be there, as will the esteemed balls of A.J. Daulerio....

Who's the Next Steroid User to Murder Their Family?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

He Wasn't A Paid Drug Dealer; He Was Just Volunteering
We like Florida head coach Urban Meyer for many reasons, not least of which is the fact that his first name describes a type of city. (We hope to someday name our child "Rural Juror Leitch.") But the reason we really love him is that EDSBS figures he believes if you kick a player off your team for s...