the Page 512 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Columbia University Wipes Out Its Delightfully Chaotic Marching Band For Bullcrap Reasons
Sad, dispiriting news from the world of college marching bands: Columbia University effectively disbanded its wonderfully anarchic and mischievous marching band Wednesday, after years and years spent actively antagonizing the group and suppressing its creativity. The university communicated to the s...
Huge Puddles At The Cycling World Championships Are Causing Some Awful Crashes
The world cycling championships have been taking place in Yorkshire, England over the past few days, and befitting an event in fall in England, it’s been rainy as hell. Riding a time trial bike in wet conditions like this is particularly difficult, and big puddles claimed several U-23 men’s riders d...
You'll Love <i>Ad Astra</i> If You Just Want To Spend Two Hours In Space With A Sad Guy
Ad Astra is a movie principally concerned with two questions: How do you cope with and overcome the psychological trauma of turning into your taciturn, emotionally remote father? And what if space turns out to be mostly bullshit?...
Welcome To The Tomsula Index
For my money, there’s no better exercise during the NFL season than to look at the bottom of the standings in order to wonder, Would Jim Tomsula, right now, be better than that team’s head coach? ...
Maple Leafs' Auston Matthews Charged With Disorderly Conduct Over Late-Night Mooning Incident
Auston Matthews, Toronto’s 22-year-old center, has a pretrial conference scheduled for Wednesday morning in Scottsdale, Arizona, related to a strange incident alleged to have taken place in a condominium complex at 2 a.m. back in May. Matthews, who may have been intoxicated at the time, is accused o...
FIFA's The Best Awards Are The Worst
In what universe is Marcelo still one of the best defenders in the world? Not in this one, or any other where performances on the field or even the amorphous “club success” criteria apply. The only place where Marcelo could be considered a starter in a world’s best XI is one where nothing matters to...
Frog-March This Revolting Gymnastics Robot Directly Into The Fires Of Mount Doom
Here is the most disgusting video I’ve watched on the internet in a long time:...
College Football Coaches Love To Get Upset About The Internet
College football coaches, as a general rule, are a weird group of people. The job seems built to attract a specific type of deeply strange person—take the most obsessive and ambitious and aggressive gym teacher possible, then pay him millions of dollars and make him one of the most recognizable and ...
Pitt Busted Out Its Version Of The Philly Special At The Perfect Time And Toppled UCF
UCF’s 27-game unbeaten run in regular-season play ended this weekend, as the Knights lost on the road to Pitt in a dramatic 35-34 stunner. The Panthers marched down the field on a 12-play game-winning drive late in the fourth quarter, and capped it off with a trick-play touchdown catch by QB Kenny P...
Hot Mic At Ole Miss-Cal Picks Up Fan Yelling "Fuck You, Communist Motherfucker"
I’m not sure what’s better here: the profane exclamation, or the fact that it seems like the play-by-play broadcaster stopped what he was saying to give the fan some space to get his point across....
Nutty Blackmail Plot Involves "Well-Known" Premier League Player Jumping Out Hotel Window Mid-Booty Call
When one Premier League player, whose name is being protected by the authorities, walked into Natalie Wood’s hotel room last year and began to undress, he must’ve believed he was only in for another night of fun and sex with the woman for whom he’d been cheating on his partner. Instead, before the p...
Tom Brady's Take On Roughing The Passer Sure Does Change A Lot When He's Not Playing
The legend of Jaguars quarterback Gardner Minshew II grew on Thursday against the Titans. No, it was not because of any particularly impressive play—though he certainly had a couple of those—but instead it’s because he’s already getting the kind of calls you’d expect a future Hall of Famer to recei...
Malcolm Gladwell Goes On Bill Simmons's Podcast To Dust Off The Oldest, Dumbest Defense Of Joe Paterno
There’s no good reason to consider Malcolm Gladwell a serious writer or thinker anymore, thanks in large part to the things Gladwell continues to write and think. Despite this, he was allowed to write a new book—if you want to know more about it, I suggest clicking on this review in The Atlantic and...
This Might Finally Be It For Eli Manning
“They absolutely are this bad,” Barry Petchesky wrote about the New York Giants exactly 365 days ago. The team had just lost to the Dallas Cowboys in a supremely listless Monday Night Football appearance. I watched it with a friend who was visiting from out of town amid a rapidly thinning crowd in a...
Busted-Up Cam Newton Is Going To Be Out For A While
Well, it looks like we have at least part of the answer to the question of what exactly is wrong with Cam Newton. His foot is all jacked up, and will remain so for an indeterminate period of time:...
Pat Narduzzi's Cowardice Doesn't Go Unpunished
So, you’re trailing 17-10, fourth-and-goal at the one-yard line, five minutes left in the fourth quarter. What do you do? Trick question: You’re Pitt coach Pat Narduzzi, a lame as hell coward, so you kick a field goal....
The Citadel Got $400,000 To Beat Georgia Tech In Football
Junior kicker Jacob Godek nailed a 37-yard field goal attempt in overtime against Georgia Tech on Saturday to hand the Yellow Jackets an embarrassing upset loss at home in a game where The Citadel ran all over their opponents. The visiting Bulldogs rushed for a total of 320 yards, with most plays co...
Reports: The Justice Department Is Investigating Sex Abuse In The Olympic Movement
The Wall Street Journal reported today that the U.S. Department of Justice has launched criminal investigations into sexual abuse across multiple U.S. Olympic organizations as well as “potential financial and business misconduct throughout the U.S. Olympic system.” Other news outlets later reported ...
What's Wrong With Cam Newton?
It’s time to start worrying about Cam Newton. If that wasn’t clear before the Panthers’ 20-14 home loss last night to the Buccaneers, it’s obvious now. The only question is whether Newton is injured or washed. ...
Just Tim Tebow Hootin' And Hollerin' About "Selfish Culture" On <i>First Take</i>
Future Mets All-Star Tim Tebow was on First Take Friday morning to talk with Stephen A. Smith and Max Kellerman about California’s legislative push to allow college athletes to profit from endorsements. That’s really as much information as you need to know that this was a brutally unpleasant few mi...