the Page 631 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

MLB On Colossal Beer Pyramid: "Wow"
What separates man from beast? Humans are weak-skinned bipeds, but our great advantage in this life is our bigass brains. We build. To engineer is human. That’s how we survived in the jungles and took over this planet. Read one way, the story of human history is a long, inexorable march towards the ...

<i>All Takes Matter</i> Signs Blogger To Join Colin Cowherd And Jason Whitlock
Jason McIntyre, founder and editor-in-chief of the blog The Big Lead, has officially signed on to join Colin Cowherd, a rat wearing a human suit, and Jason Whitlock on their upcoming Fox Sports 1 show, according to multiple sources with knowledge of the negotiations. The hour-long “discussion and op...

"I Am Unfamiliar With BOFA": Tom Tips Back
We get a lot of tips—email us at [email protected]!—and Deadspin news editor Tom Ley is from time to time compelled to respond. These conversations are shared with you, the reading public, in a feature we call Tom Tips Back....

Mike Francesa Is Very Annoyed That <i>Sports Illustrated</i> Put Lionel Messi On Its Cover
If Mike Francesa’s visceral disdain for soccer didn’t come through clear enough when he stumbled his way through a simple MLS ad read last week, today’s rant aimed at SI for their decision to dedicate the mag’s cover to Lionel Messi and a big portion of its coverage (specifically, as Mike discovers:...

Miami Marlins Sue Season Ticket Holders, Continue To Be The Worst
Remember when the Miami Marlins sued Jonathan Vilma because he moved his barbecue restaurant out of the stadium after the Marlins screwed up his food and failed to deliver on their promise of a packed house and booming business? Well, now the Marlins are suing even more people who had the audacity t...

James Conner Says He Is Cancer Free
In December, Pitt running back James Conner announced that he had been diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma. This afternoon, just over six months later, he announced that he was cancer free. ...

LSU Mascot Mike The Tiger Diagnosed With Inoperable Form Of Cancer
LSU’s live tiger mascot, Mike the Tiger, has a rare and inoperable form of cancer, and will soon undergo a treatment of radiation therapy that has never before been used on a tiger, reports The Advocate. A tumor was discovered next to Mike’s eye by a student trainer, and a CT scan confirmed it was s...

A Kid-Related Résumé Gap Is Nothing To Hide
Are you ready for some good news about the way the workforce treats parents? Of course you are. A new study shows that, contrary to conventional wisdom, parents returning to the workforce after a childcare hiatus are more likely to be hired if they explain the gap in their career experience....

Padres Apologize To San Diego Gay Men's Chorus For Anthem Screwup, Fire Contractor Responsible
The San Diego Padres have issued an apology to the San Diego Gay Men’s Chorus for playing a prerecorded woman’s voice through the speakers while the group was supposed to perform “The Star-Spangled Banner” before Saturday’s game....

The First 4 Races At Pimlico Killed 2 Horses Today
This fine animal, name of Homeboykris, won the first race at Pimlico today, hit the winner’s circle, and then flat-out died on the way back the barn, probably of a heart attack. He was 9 years old, and has won 15 races in his career. Three races later, in the final turn, a 4-year-old named Pramedya ...

God Save The Pop Singer Hired To Perform FA Cup Final National Anthem And Didn't
British pop singer Karen Harding had one job before today’s FA Cup Final at Wembley: to sing “God Save The Queen.” It didn’t work out so well for her—having missed her cue, she stood silently for most of the anthem before finally chiming in for the final few words. At least those are the most import...

Here's The Best Sports Highlight Of The Day
Classic pre-summer Friday, not much going on in the sports world or at work, all your friends are probably off drinking outside or something fun like that. But be glad you’re still here, because you’re about to have your shit ruined by this sick crossover....

NCAA Once Again Bans Fun
The College Softball World Series is coming up in two weeks, and thanks to a new NCAA initiative, it’ll be a lot less fun than last year. Regional tournaments open this weekend, and the NCAA has decided that they will crack down and enforce an arcane rule against props in the dugout starting with t...

Floyd Mayweather, Jr. And Conor McGregor Will Never Fight And Thank God
There has been a lot of talk lately about Floyd Mayweather, Jr. fighting Conor McGregor. The reasons why are obvious: It would be the Freddy vs. Jason of combat sports, the bad boy box office king of one premier combat sport against the bad boy box office king of the other. Unfortunately, the much-b...

Brandon Phillips Freaked Juan Uribe Out With A Fake Tag
Major League Baseball is apparently all about fun and mischief tonight, as another NL second baseman tricked a baserunner with a deke. Daniel Murphy got Yoenis Cespedes with a fake throw earlier tonight, and Brandon Phillips caught Juan Uribe loafing off second base with his empty glove. Poor Uribe ...

Daniel Murphy Freezes Yoenis Cespedes With The Ole Fake Throw Trick
NL hitting leader Daniel Murphy and his new buddies on the Washington Nationals are in New York to take on the Mets, for whom Murphy jerked some postseason dongs last year. Washington put a whooping on New York last night, and they’re up big tonight thanks to Matt Harvey’s bad start....

Dumb Teen Dresses Up In Full England Kit, Invades National Team's Practice
Wily British teen Harry Peak got in his silly little teenaged brain a silly little idea for a prank: what if he showed up to the English national team’s open practice, decked out in a full England kit, and tried getting onto the field by pretending he was a player? Like most plans borne of the teena...

Who Is Going To Kill Ramsay Bolton?
There are only two questions that I’m interested in seeing answered during this season of Game of Thrones: Is Ramsay Bolton going to get fucked all the way up? If he is, who is going to do it?...
