the Page 862 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
"Hell Is Other People's Fantasy Teams": Do Fantasy Sports Alienate Us?
Republished from The Classical. Art by Dmitry Samarov....
Miami TV Station Congratulates The Florida International University Panthers On Their Stanley Cup Playoff Win
The Florida Panthers took a 2-1 series lead over the New Jersey Devils with an astonishing 4-3 win that came after falling behind 3-0 in the first period. It's understandable, then, that the story led off the 10:00 news on Miami's WSVN; perhaps unaccustomed to hockey success, they got a few details...
Is It Time To Forgive Mel Gibson?
As much as our society loves to mock celebrities, we love to forgive them even more. We'll pick on Lindsay Lohan for her drug problems or Nicolas Cage for his bankruptcy money woes* and bad movies, but, deep down, we're hoping that they'll pull out of their nosedives. The redemption story is a power...
Here's The Only Woman In New York Unimpressed By Derek Jeter
The Yankees fell to .500 on the season with a 7-3 home loss to Minnesota last night, though Derek Jeter continued his hot hitting with two knocks—including a leadoff homer in the bottom of the first. All that, though, wasn't enough to impress this lass in the Legend Seats....
There Was A Clown In Courtside Seats At MSG Yesterday, And For Once It Wasn't Donald Trump
Despite another strong game from Carmelo Anthony, the New York Knicks dropped their third straight this season to the Heat yesterday 93-85, a result we're sure put a sad face on all Knicks fans in attendance—at least those who didn't, you know, show up with a face already painted on....
Brian Bosworth Was Probably A Shitty Landlord
The Boz, as he is affectionately known to people from the early nineties who loved mullets and C action films, is being sued for some sort of septic system gone awry in a mansion he owned as recently as 2009. Let's just table the outright absurdity of Brian Bosworth actually owning a mansion in 200...
Inside The Mind Of NBC's Pervy Cameraman: "BOOBS!"
NBC's Stanley Cup playoff coverage is fantastic; the product they air on TV is great, but the extra camera feeds they offer online add an additional degree of coverage for those truly passionate about hockey. It's clear at least one of NBC's camera operators is passionate about something else, th...
Bearded Batman Drinks Heineken, Probably Does Not Fight Crime
So Batman's a hockey fan, and definitely not the Lamborghini Batman or the Michigan Batman, at least today. But lest you forget, you better believe he's The Goddamn Batman....
This Resizing Of The Batter's Box Sponsored By <em>The Three Stooges</em>
Yesterday's White Sox home opener against the Tigers was delayed when Detroit slugger Miguel Cabrera noticed the batter's boxes weren't in the right place, leading to the above display of buffoonery. Cabrera's at-bat (which came after consecutive Jake Peaky strikeouts) was pushed back nearly nine m...
London Olympics Invite Keith Moon, Dead For 34 Years, To Play Closing Ceremony
There are just about a hundred days to go before the Summer Olympics, so presumably all the heavy lifting is done. The venues are built, the support staff hired and trained, and all that's left is getting the little touches right, so as to avoid incidents like Wayne Gretzky's face....
In Praise Of Stupid Laughs. <em>The Three Stooges</em>, Reviewed.
1. An old joke: "Why do women not like The Three Stooges? Because they're not funny." The appeal of The Three Stooges has always been inherently male, predominantly young male, specifically adolescent, glue-sniffing boy. Now, that's not to say that 10-year-olds the world over are obsessed with The T...
This Texas Rangers Fan Can Do Amazing Things With Her Mouth
And yet this is still only the second-weirdest face ever to appear in the background behind erstwhile sideline reporter Jim Knox. (This would be the weirdest.)...
When Serious Actors Become Action Stars: A Guide
This Friday, Lockout opens, and beyond its prison-colony-in-space hook, probably the most interesting element to this sci-fi film is "Holy cow, is that Guy Pearce kickin' all that ass?" Why, yes, it is—and it's a conscious departure from the serious dramatic roles we usually see from him (Memento, L...
They Learn The Art Of Trolling At A Young Age In Vancouver
This young Canucks fan just couldn't help but give Kings coach Darryl Sutter a piece of his mind—or, at least, his mouth—during a break in the action of last night's Stanley Cup playoff opening game of the L.A.-Vancouver series. (He's got some good role models for that kind of behavior, after all.)...
Just Three More Months Until <em>The Dark Knight Rises</em>, Folks
It always seems like the summer movie season begins earlier every year, but it doesn't, not really. The unofficial beginning in 2012 is May 4, when The Avengers—a movie that's so big, apparently, that it turned massive tentpole films like Iron Man 2 and Thor into, essentially, prequels—opens wide, f...
Why Yes, This Human-Chicken-Squid Hybrid Is A Cubs Fan
Ronnie Tomaszewski was skipping yet another of his classes at North Park University when he remembered it was Thursday already and he was a bit short on cash for what was sure to be a big weekend of partying. A few of his fraternity brothers had testified to the easy money of that old college stand...
Bubba Watson Is "Just Going To Be Bubba" And Keep Playing "Bubba Golf"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Bubba Golf is like regular golf, only Bubba-er....
Do You Like Self-Conscious Scary Movies? <em>The Cabin In The Woods</em>, Reviewed.
Sixteen years ago, I saw Scream for the first time. I loved it. Not only was it funny and smart, it felt like a game-changer: a movie that exploded all the conventions of its genre while at the same time being a really good example of its genre. By pointing out all the clichés of horror movies, Scre...
Jose Maria Olazabal Was Pulled Over Doing 97 MPH After Leaving The Masters
Two-time Masters champion Jose Maria Olazabal was ticketed in southeastern Georgia yesterday morning after he was clocked going 97 mph in a 65 mph zone....
Spectator Arrested For Trying To Take A Cup Of Masters Sand
This is what happens when you fetishize a golf course to the point of holiness: some drunk dude from Ohio's going to try to pocket some of the dirt. Forty-year-old Clayton Baker was busted Sunday, after the tournament ended, when he slipped under the ropes and attempted to fill a cup with sand from ...