the Page 981 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
All Your Hopes And Fears Will Be Revealed Once You Open ... "The Door"
The Door is blowing up! It has devotees, worshipers, even its own Facebook fan group. The vigil continues....
Shawn Johnson Is Having A Rough Couple Of Weeks
After Shawn Johnson spent last week worried about a deranged stalker, she returns to "Dancing With The Stars" only to be greeted by what appears to be a deranged boner in her partner's pants. (NSFW?)...
Will James Donaldson Become America's Tallest Mayor?
Next to the Space Needle he's the city's tallest landmark, so why not James Donaldson for mayor of Seattle? And he says that his first order of business will be ... bringing back the SuperSonics....
Mike Krzyzewski, The Final Depantsing
It's not so troublesome that Mike Krzyzewski was in this Guitar Hero commercial; it seems he's spent all season with his pants around his ankles, as other teams run off with his lunch money....
Darren Daulton Still Delightfully Nuts
One would think that with the power of astral travel, Darren Daulton would choose to visit Vienna during the Renaissance, or Rome during the reign of the Caesars. But a card show in Ephrata, Pa.?...
The One Where The Yapping Hand Job Picks A Scab (Update)
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....
When Porn Meets Sports, Vol. II
They're calling this The Gailey Position, or, The Dade County Toothbrush. I find nothing funny about it, and wish people would just grow the hell up. (Hee hee). [Every Day Should Be Saturday]...
The Comment Of The Week Is Not A Slave To Fashion
Welcome to Deadspin's famed Comment of the Week feature, wherein we recognize some of Deadspin's wittiest and best-written comments from the week that was, and give away valuable mystery prizes....
Getting To The Bottom Of The Lingerie Football League
It's time for Waxing Off, the only Internet feature to turn down federal stimulus bailout money. This week's topic: The scourge of the Lingerie Football League....
Darren Rovell Vs. The Fifth Third Burger
If that burger had a mouth, it could totally eat him in two bites.Click for the video and watch him eat it in front of Jim Cramer. [CNBC]...
NCAA Sweet 16: (1) Pittsburgh vs. (4) Xavier
East Region: No. 1 Pittsburgh (30-4) vs. No. 4 Xavier (27-7) When: Thursday, 7:27 p.m., EDT Where: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts PITT PANTHERS 1) Sean Miller A Pitt grad and former Pitt assistant coach. Often touted as Jamie Dixon's eventual replacement, Miller currently spends his ti...
Trey Wingo Thinks Jay Cutler Should "Get Over It"
"You know what? Players lose in the NFL. That's the way it goes. Everybody is a commodity...Everybody is tradable. If Joe Montana was tradable I'm pretty sure Jay Cutler is..." [OnTheDL]...
Ryan Moats Denied Deathbed Visit To Mother-In-Law By Heartless Cop
Former Eagle claims an overzealous policeman prevented him and his wife from rushing to the hospital to visit her dying mother. Maybe he should have flashed his lights? [Lew P]...
It's The Last Post Of The Day; What Do You Want Me To Do, Put In Rudi Stein?
Wednesday's DUAN brought to you by Chico's Bail Bonds, and the fine folks at Just My Show, who interviewed David Pollock recently and made me quite nostalgic for the kids of the North Valley League....
Chris Bosh Did Not Have A Good Birthday
The Toronto Raptors center turned 25 years old today, but I doubt that the gift he received was on his wish list—news has leaked of a lawsuit accusing him of being a deadbeat dad....
March Madness Devolves Into All-Out Meat Blogging War
The mainstream media has once again been accused of pilfering from the little guy in his mom's basement, only this time the stakes have been raised dramatically. And so have the steaks....
Josh McDaniels Wonders Why Jay Cutler Is Ignoring His Facebook Friend Request
Refusing a face-to-face meeting is one thing, but you know the relationship is damaged when Broncos' quarterback Jay Cutler ignores your text messages. Poor Josh McDaniels....
Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: "The Rocket That Fell To Earth"
Jeff Pearlman's "The Rocket That Fell To Earth" comes out today. It's an unflinching look at how Roger Clemens became one of the most dominating pitchers before and after his alleged steroid use....
Concession Stand Bon Vivants: Bow Down To Your New Mexi-Meat Overlord
The minor league West Michigan Whitecaps bring "The Fifth Third Burger" to their concession menu this year. Taste America: 1.66 pounds of beef. Lettuce and tomato. Salsa. Sour cream. Chili. Fritos. [CNBC]...
The Comment Of The Week Will Never Feud With 50 Cent
Welcome to Deadspin's famed Comment of the Week feature, wherein we recognize some of Deadspin's wittiest and best-written comments from the week that was, and give away valuable mystery prizes....