ti Page 1060 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sweden Knock Italy Out Of World Cup Qualifying
For the first time since 1958 and only the second time ever, the Italian national team will not qualify for the World Cup. A 0-0 draw with Sweden in the second leg of the European play-off round sealed their fate, after the Azzurri lost 1-0 in the first leg on Friday....
Our Dear Sweet Wonderteen Christian Pulisic Is Very Sad About Missing The World Cup
Once the rage subsided within the proud hearts of American soccer fans in response to the USMNT’s humiliating failure to qualify for next summer’s World Cup, the feeling that settled in has been one of profound sadness. Mostly, this sadness has centered on what was stolen from us—namely, the opportu...
Notre Dame Fans Get Into Slippery Brawl With Miami Fans
While the Notre Dame Fighting Irish were getting their asses kicked by the Miami Hurricanes on Saturday, a passel of fans reenacted the scene on the concourse of Miami’s stadium near sections 129 and 130. All was technically peaceful, until an offscreen Miami fan flung a beverage at the dude in the ...
The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is This Maryland Fan's Refusal To Lose At Musical Chairs
In a game of musical chairs, what do you do if someone gets to the last chair before you? Do you try to remove them from the chair, or do you, as this Maryland basketball fan did, remove the chair from them?...
JuJu Smith-Schuster Regrets His Sloppy Post-TD Performance As Choking Victim Jalen Ramsey
The Steelers have put together a strong portfolio of touchdown celebrations this season, but they had a bit of a stumble Sunday against the Colts. After receiver JuJu Smith-Schuster scored in the third quarter, he celebrated by reenacting one of Week 9's NFL fights. Smith-Schuster portrayed Jalen Ra...
LeBron James Won't Ruin This For Me, Dammit
After the Cavs escaped the clutches of the league-worst Mavs—it was a two-point game with 36.8 seconds to go—LeBron James decided to offer a compliment so narrow in scope that it could reasonably be interpreted as an insult:...
Aubrey Huff <i>Almost</i> Has Thoughts On Evolution
“Look at the dumb thing this idiot tweeted” feels like a very circa-2013 blogging approach, but there are times to make exceptions. So look at the dumb thing Aubrey Huff tweeted:...
Jaguars Junction: Week Nine
The last time we checked in on the Jacksonville Jaguars, football, they possessed a record of three wins and two losses. And now? ...
CFL Team Raises Bar For Touchdown Celebrations
Up north in the CFL playoffs, the Ottawa Redblacks outdid any NFL team this season with a limbo celebration after a first-quarter touchdown by Diontae Spencer, who was the limbo stick after scoring. And one end is a guy named Rhymes!...
Vontaze Burfict Triumphantly Exits Field After First Career Ejection
Vontaze Burfict caught what was surprisingly his first-ever NFL ejection in the first half of today’s Bengals game against the Titans. He didn’t seem to mind:...
Stefon Diggs Flagged For Pretending To Be A Plane And Jumping Into The Goalposts<em></em>
The NFL relaxed its touchdown celebration rules this year, but some things are still verboten. For example, Le’Veon Bell was penalized earlier this year for punching the goalposts like Vai Sikahema....
The Thrills And Spills Of Watersports
Let’s discuss a slippery topic....
Masked Kyrie Irving Will Return To Wreak Destruction On The NBA
Get ready, NBA, for the return of Masked Kyrie Irving. No, I’m not referring to Uncle Drew, here. The errant Aron Baynes elbow that smashed into Irving’s face Friday and ended his night reportedly caused a facial fracture, and you know what that means:...
The Minnesota Timberwolves Are Up To Their Same Old Bullshit
The Minnesota Timberwolves are 7-5, and 4-1 at home, and 11th in the NBA in offense, with a pair of wins over the hot-shot Oklahoma City Thunder already on their résumé. That’s good! On the other hand they don’t seem, today, like a team that’s having a very good time, fresh off a loss to the Phoenix...
The Celtics Are Better Than They Have Any Damn Right To Be
Apparently the Celtics don’t even need players. Just Brad Stevens standing on the sideline, pointing his brain waves at the ball for 48 minutes. Last night they lost Kyrie Irving after teammate Aron Baynes elbowed him across the nose, fell behind by as many as 18 points, and came all the way back to...
What Are You Doing, Under Armour.
It can’t be this hard to be a damn apparel company, right?...
Chiefs Defensive Lineman Roy Miller Arrested And Charged With Domestic Battery
Kansas City Chiefs defensive lineman Roy Miller was arrested and charged with domestic battery Saturday morning in Jacksonville, Florida, reports ESPN:...
Diane Nukuri's Long Run To Freedom
“My brother used to cover for me, and tell my mom I was visiting my grandma when I was out running,” says Diane Nukuri. “But people in the village would tell on me—‘I saw your daughter running. Such a shame.’”...
The Columbus Crew's Austin Relocation Effort Has Its Own Oafish Astroturfing Campaign<em></em><em></em>
While the Columbus Crew are gearing up for an Eastern Conference Finals matchup with the formidable Toronto FC, their carpetbagging owner Anthony Precourt is continuing his efforts to move the Crew out of Ohio and resettle them in Austin. Last night, the Austin city council voted to look into the vi...
The Warlords Who Rule Chechnya And Bahrain's Repressive Regime Are Bonding Over MMA
This past April 5, Ramzan Kadyrov, the longtime head of the Chechen Republic, arrived in Bahrain for an official state visit with the kingdom’s royal family. Flanked by a delegation from the Chechen government—intimidating henchmen with atrocious résumés of human rights abuses among them—Kadryov bro...