ti Page 1127 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cristiano Ronaldo Gave A Truly Moving Speech After Winning Euro 2016
Literally nothing bad to say about this. Cristiano Ronaldo did a legitimately cool thing. I’m as shocked as you....
“You Shitti Farty Dirty Nasty JUDE Bitch!”: Trump Voters Send Their Best
Donald Trump is about to be president, a white nationalist is whispering in his ear, and Jeff “The Ku Klux Klan Is Alright By Me” Sessions will soon be our attorney general. We are entering a golden age for racists in America. And according to my inbox, these assholes know it....
What Not To Do
“The Left,” to the extent such a thing exists in America, seems extremely energized by Donald Trump’s victory. They/ we are ready to fight back! What’s the plan? How about... more of the same?...
Tom Thibodeau Hasn't Changed
If you’re a Timberwolves fan, you no doubt enjoyed watching your team flex on the hapless Sixers on national TV last night. Karl-Anthony Towns undressed Joel Embiid multiple times, Andrew Wiggins hit shots from all over the floor, and the future once again looked bright. But if you watched the blowo...
Indiana Supreme Court Rules Against ESPN, Says Notre Dame Cops Can Keep All The Secrets They Want
Indiana’s Supreme Court ruled against ESPN and Outside the Line’s Paula Lavigne earlier this week, saying that Notre Dame police could refuse releasing any records it damn well pleases, including police reports requested by ESPN. In doing so, the court reversed an appeals court decision in favor of ...
Luke Kuechly Weeps His Way Off The Field After Scary Injury
Panthers star linebacker Luke Kuechly took a nasty head injury in the fourth quarter of tonight’s close game against the Saints. Kuechly had to be carted off and he did not hide his emotions as he was leaving the field. It wasn’t immediately apparent what part of his body exactly Kuechly hurt, but t...
Good Luck Trying To Keep Karl-Anthony Towns From Embarrassing You
Timothé Luwawu-Cabarrot was projected to be an intriguing small forward in the NBA thanks to his smooth athleticism and impressive physical profile. However, in tonight’s game against the Wolves, he merely ended up like an intriguing bug splattered across the windshield after Karl-Anthony Towns dunk...
Houston Is Destroying Fifth-Ranked Louisville Thanks To Some Insane Plays
Louisville came into this evening’s game with Houston with a decent chance of making the playoff. Even if Alabama and Clemson win out, all they had to do was win out and inevitably leapfrog the loser of the Ohio State-Michigan game. Instead, they are in the process of getting turned into jelly by th...
Zach LaVine Pulled Off The Rare Free-Throw Putback Dunk
Zach LaVine has always been an athletic freak capable of jamming it on people and pulling off a wide variety of spectacular dunks. This year, he’s improved his shooting and ballhandling and turned into a very good all-around player for the young Timberwolves. However, he’s also still liable to go of...
Stanford Band Doofuses Still Barred From Cal Rivalry Game
The Stanford marching band has been banned from road games since May 2015 for a “sexual hazing” scandal, but they’ve been allowed to attend bowl games. They made everyone mad at the Rose Bowl last year by being quirky and transgressive enough to make a completely out-of-left-field joke about how muc...
Cobb County Plans To Bulldoze An Entire Neighborhood Next To New Braves Ballpark
The Braves’ new ballpark out in suburban Cobb County was built with $400 million in public money, even though the public had no say in negotiations. The politician who spearheaded the deal got voted out of office this summer, but the park is still scheduled to open next spring. Cobb County may have ...
Can You Make Out Anything Crazy Ed Orgeron Says In This Fiery Pregame Speech?
The difference between our idea of pregame speeches and the reality of those speeches is generally pretty stark. Coaches probably like to imagine themselves as priming their players to “run through a wall,” but any time we get a peek a a real speech we often see a bunch of lame platitudes being str...
How The Titans Went Retro And Unleashed Marcus Mariota
Last year, the Tennessee Titans drafted quarterback Marcus Mariota No. 2 overall. This year, they opted to keep Mike Mularkey as their head coach, and Mularkey loudly and proudly signaled his intention to install a ground-and-pound offense that didn’t seem suited to Mariota’s spread-system skill set...
Joe Flacco Regrets Buying All Those Uncomfortable Massage Chairs
Baltimore Ravens quarterback Joe Flacco has a reputation for being dull. That word isn’t pulled out of nowhere; his own father used it to describe him. It’s an apt description of a man who once roused up his team at halftime by saying, “Let’s go win a game!”...
Government Employees On Trump: "Everything. Is. Fucked."
Across the federal government, career employees are reckoning with the prospect of working for a Donald Trump administration. Today, people from the CDC, NLRB, DOT, TSA, and other agencies speak very freely about their hopes and fears....
Ex-Player Fears James Rodríguez Has Become A Whiny Little Brat By Hanging Around Ronaldo
Cristiano Ronaldo is exalted for a great many reasons. He’s also reviled and/or ridiculed for a few others, like his arrogance, his lack of sportsmanship, and his self-centeredness. One retired Colombian player is worried that a compatriot of his, James Rodríguez, has picked up a few too many of Ron...
Johnny Manziel Reaches Plea Deal In Domestic Abuse Case
Former Browns quarterback Johnny Manziel has made a deal with prosecutors that will lead to the dismissal of a domestic assault case involving his former girlfriend, Colleen Crowley....
Ways To Die That Are More Awful Than Dissolving In A Scalding Acid Bath, Ranked
A tourist who fancied a bath in one of Yellowstone National Park’s many geothermal pools slipped while attempting to gauge the temperature of the broth, fell into what turned out to be a deadly near-boiling acid bath, and dissolved. That is about the most metal thing I can imagine, but also he is ex...
Devin Booker Saunters Out, Signs Autograph After Extremely Chill Ejection
The Suns were in the closing stages of a road loss to the Nuggets when young Suns shooting guard Devin Booker made an official mad and got himself tossed. Booker then nonchalantly strolled off the court, but not before saying his goodbyes. He then indulged a pair of fans. ...
The Washington Wizards Are In A Bad Place Right Now
The Wizards are playing like a big pile of dog poop this season, and they delivered their most nauseating performance of the year tonight against the Sixers. Philadelphia didn’t even have their talismanic center Joel Embiid, but they shot 54.5 percent against the Wizards tonight and beat them for ju...