ti Page 1232 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ben Carson's Presidential Campaign Was A Big Success
Hear me, O Americans. If lots of people want to give you lots and lots of money to go stand on stages and just kinda sleepily free-associate whatever pops into your mind in response to prompts from strangers, and want to treat you like a rock star for doing it, and will support you in this behavior ...
Something Sketchy Is Going On Between Nike And The Kenyan Athletics Federation
Kenyan runners have dominated men’s and women’s distance running for decades now, and they own 18 world records, from the middle distances to the marathon. Nike has an exclusive sponsorship agreement with the Kenyan athletics federation (Athletics Kenya), wherein they pay a boatload of money for Ken...
A Child's Treasury Of Photos Of Nate Diaz Beating Conor McGregor's Ass
Conor McGregor is a blowhard troll who’s been terrorizing the top ranks of pro fighters lately, while Nate Diaz is a lovable dirtbag who’s lost more than he’s won over the last couple of years. McGregor says things like, “I’ve got world titles and multi millions of dollars, you got 20 thousand to sh...
Illinois Football Fires The Coach They Just Hired (Update: Lovie Smith Will Reportedly Replace Him)
Remember back in late November, when the Illinois Fighting Illini had just lost to Northwestern to wrap up a 5-7 season, and the school announced it had signed interim coach Bill Cubit to a two-year, $2.4 million deal? At that time—right after they’d hired him!—interim AD Paul Kowalczyk told reporte...
Utica Greens Are The Dopest Meal You Can Make With "Greens" In The Name
We do this thing in my house where we arbitrarily shoehorn green things into the family diet, generally in quantities insufficient for any real nutritional purpose. Most often, this takes the form of a small bowl of sad lettuce splashed with cheap balsamic and presented as some sort of pre-dinner ha...
Wisconsin Investigated Bo Ryan After Extramarital Affair, Denies It Caused His Resignation
Following allegations made in February 2015 by a woman who claimed she carried on a lengthy affair with then-Wisconsin head coach Bo Ryan, the university conducted an investigation into his conduct and concluded in May that Ryan did not misuse university resources. According to a statement from u...
Carmelo Anthony Sounds So Sad After The Knicks' Latest Collapse
The Knicks have had a rather tempestuous last month. They fired Derek Fisher, got into just the dumbest heckling controversy, and had to hold a press conference denying that Kurt Rambis was, in fact, horny online. On top of all that, they’ve lost 16 of 19. Kristaps Porzingis’ continued delightfulnes...
Cristiano Ronaldo Starts Hat Trick With Pair Of Brilliant Goals
Cristiano Ronaldo shook? Not if today’s appearance against Celta is any sign, as the Real Madrid hero earned a hat trick by the 64th minute after a trio of stunning second-half goals. The first came on a screamer in open play, and the second on a vintage Ronaldo free kick....
Dumbass American Has The Stupidest Ideas On How To "Fix" The Champions League
What you’re about to read is really, really stupid. Like, snap-your-laptop-in-two-over-your-knee stupid. Seal-up-Europe’s-borders-Donald-Trump-style-to-keep-out-Americans stupid. And as a soccer fan on this side of the Atlantic who doesn’t share sports executive Charlie Stillitano’s braindead takes ...
I Don't Think This Is A Very Good Idea, Bryce Harper
I don’t work out, but I still feel comfortable saying that this looks like a pretty dumb way to exercise:...
How To Party Without Drinking
About two years ago, I quit drinking. Initially, I didn’t attempt to “mask” my teetotalism at social gatherings: I’d meet a group at a bar, never order anything, and give long-winded answers to anyone who asked why. As my friends and coworkers can attest, it can be awkward as hell being stone-cold s...
Timberwolves Fans Sue Team Over Bullshit Ticket Policy
It’s not just the Yankees that are trying to shake down their own fans via oppressive ticketing policies. The Minnesota Timberwolves are doing their part to speed us toward a future in which all games are played in front of crowds consisting only of rich people and paid-for empty seats....
Bad Old Man Would Vote For Other Bad Old Man
Mike Ditka, a screaming bowl of sausage gravy, went on the radio yesterday and said that if the presidential election were to happen tomorrow, he would probably vote for Donald Trump, a racist haggis....
Spanish Coach Once Showed His Players A Porno To Pump Them Up Before A Game
Apparently Louis van Gaal isn’t the only manager who wants his players to be horny for victory. One coach who shared the Dutchman’s preference for literal hard men, Joaquín Caparrós, even went as far as incorporating porn in a pregame talk to ram his point home....
Golf Child Christens Tiger Woods's New Course With A Hole-In-One
Tiger Woods just opened a new golf course in Montgomery, Tex., and he played the course’s inaugural round with some kids. One of those kids was 11-year-old Taylor Crozier, who stepped up the first tee and dropped in an ace....
Some Things That Probably Won't Kill You In Hong Kong
Certainly, street food in Hong Kong will kill you, and this I was prepared for, steering clear of the three-day chicken feet in spicy salmonella sauce. But there are other hazards. Ignorance, for one. I didn’t realize the Special Administrative Region that is Hong Kong is not only a high-rise jungle...
Penn State Running Back Saquon Barkley Is Young And Strong
Here is Saquon Barkley, freshman running back at Penn State, lifting a great deal of weight like it’s no big deal:...
Republican Voters Vote For A Very Republican Republican
Back in August, I wrote a post accusing the political media of covering Donald Trump’s presidential candidacy more, and more seriously, than it deserved. “Stop Pretending Donald Trump Is Running For President,” I titled the post. D’oh....
Kevin Garnett Tells Eric Gordon Exactly What He Thinks Of Him
Kevin Garnett may not have been fit enough to play in Saturday’s game against the Pelicans, but he still came to arena ready to talk some shit. That’s because KG is always ready to talk some shit....
Curt Schilling Is Back With Some Takes On Hillary Clinton And Donald Trump
With the interminably long primary season crawling towards the election, you should probably expect to hear a lot from ESPN baseball analyst Curt Schilling. He has (somewhat) toned down the social media postings that got him into trouble with his employer, but he’s going to continue offering his pol...