ti Page 1287 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fuck Fabric Softener
Welcome back to Laundry School! This week, as promised, I’m taking your questions about the products that we use in our laundry, with a focus today more on dryer and drying-related products than last week’s lesson, which was more washer-focused, centering on detergents and boosters. ...
Here Are 14 Things You Will Say To Your Kids A Million Goddamn Times
I have three kids. They don’t fucking listen. One day, God as my witness, they will listen. They will stop, turn around, not talk for five seconds, and say to me, “Wow, I never thought of it that way before. Thanks, Dad!” I swear it will happen. I will destroy entire countries if I have to make it s...
Whose Disgusting Baseball Chin Is This?
Welcome back to Whose Disgusting Baseball Chin Is This? a regular feature in which we ask readers to identify a baseball player based on a closely cropped image of his disgusting chin. So, whose chin is this? Use the image slider below to find out....
<i>Teen Mom 2</i> Is Back: Why Are We Still Watching This Shit?
The sixth season of MTV’s Teen Mom 2 is upon us, disrupting our Thursday nights with the usual turmoil: custody battles, problematic exes, run-ins with the law, souring relationships, and so forth. At this point, the four young stars of the series, who we first met in 2010 on the network’s flagship ...
First FIFA Official Arrested For Corruption Extradited To U.S.
Swiss authorities have approved the extradition of one of the seven FIFA officials who were arrested on corruption charges in Zurich two months ago. The unnamed official was handed off to a three-man U.S. police escort and flown to New York, according to Reuters....
This Water Slide Is So Long I Think I'd Get Bored Halfway Down
Action Park, in northern New Jersey, unveiled this absurd 1,975-foot water slide last week, and it has since been verified by Guinness as the longest in the world. Water slides are great, of course, and you’d think the longer they are the better. But about a minute into this ride, I’d already be won...
How's Tiger Woods's British Open Going So Far?
Not great, my friend! Not great at all....
It's Good To Embarrass Your Kids
What good is having kids if you can’t embarrass them? This great mom, who did the same dance at 32 places across Disneyland, totally gets it. Her kids are over it, and she’s loving it, and so am I....
This Was The Absolute Worst Time For A Pie In The Face
Over at Grantland, Michael Schur shared a fantastic piece of old footage for a barren sports day like today. Las Vegas Stars designated hitter Joe Vitiello was being interviewed at the 2000 Triple-A All-Star Game after going 3 for 3 at the plate. Schur’s right when he says you have to watch the full...
Justin Houston Is Finally Getting <i>Paid</i>
Chiefs’ pass-rushing linebacker Justin Houston has signed a massive extension to stay in Kansas City. It’s six years, $101 million, which are both big and somewhat imaginary numbers, but this one isn’t: $52.5 million in guaranteed money....
I Don't Really Have Anything To Say About This White Kid's Bad Rap Song
Here is a bad rap song:...
Why Marcus Mariota Hasn't Signed His Titans Contract Yet
The Titans report for training camp two weeks from tomorrow. Unless things change they will do so without their new franchise quarterback....
Earthquakes Mascot Sacks Idiot On The Field, Gets Shoved By Opponents
San Jose Earthquakes mascot Q is no stranger to fighting with opponents, and (his?) attempt to tackle an Idiot On The Field after tonight’s International Champions Cup match against Club América earned some pushing and shoving from the Liga MX side’s players who didn’t take kindly to his treatment o...
Diego Maradona Can't Decide Whether To Defend Or Bash Lionel Messi
Lionel Messi failed to drag Argentina to the title in yet another major international tournament, giving his countrymen another shot to break out the bats and partake in what is now looking like the real Argentine national pastime: beating up on Messi’s reputation. As has been typical of the man’s h...
Police: Ryan O’Reilly Drunk Drove His 1951 Chevy Into A Tim Hortons
According to radio station CFPL and confirmed by Ontario Provincial Police, Buffalo Sabres forward Ryan O’Reilly was arrested last Thursday and charged with impaired driving in Lucan, Ont., as well as failing to remain at the scene of a traffic accident. In a very Canadian twist, police say O’Reilly...
MLB Will Shorten The Home Run Derby Because Of The Weather
Severe weather is expected in much of the Midwest tonight, and that includes Cincinnati, home of the All-Star Game and tonight’s Home Run Derby. There’s the possibility of lightning, damaging winds, and downpours like the ones that rolled through this afternoon:...
Mets Create Instagram Account Exclusively Dedicated To Lucas Duda
Good news for all those Dudanators (that’s what Lucas Duda fans call themselves, probably): Mets players Curtis Granderson, John Mayberry Jr., and Danny Muno have made @wefollowlucasduda, an Instagram account focused on, well, Lucas Duda....
You're Never Safe When Billy Hamilton Is On Base
I’m not sure what compelled Billy Hamilton to make this ballsy play during Saturday’s game against the Marlins—maybe when you steal as many bases as he does, you get bored and and have to find new ways to challenge yourself—but I sure am glad that he went for it:...