ti Page 1289 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cristiano Ronaldo Has A Great Time Getting Felt Up On Japanese TV
They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Apparently the aphorism applies a little differently to cyborgs. New evidence shows that a finger or five on Cristiano Ronaldo’s laser-cut abs turns him into a giggling schoolborg who will love you forever....
Rory McIlroy Will Miss The British Open
That ankle injury that Rory McIlroy suffered while playing soccer will indeed keep the golfer out of this year’s British Open. McIlroy announced that he’ll be missing the tournament with a sad Instagram post:...
My Dad's Terrible Child-Care Activities, Ranked
School is out. What the hell are we going to do with these kids? Camps cost a fortune. Sports leagues are a pain in the ass. And who wants to stare at another listless, self-aware gorilla at the zoo? What a downer!...
Zach Mettenberger Fires Back At J.J. Watt, Is Now A Dead Man Walking
Titans quarterback Zach Mettenberger sat down for an interview with CampusSports.net, and in the middle of answering standard questions about football or whatever, he signed his own death warrant....
Justin Upton Gets Up To Rob A Dinger
Damn, Justin Upton, what did Andrew McCutchen ever do to you? McCutchen had to think this go-ahead homer was long gone but Upton, recently named the Padres’ lone representative to the All-Star game, got way up above the wall to take it away. McCutchen got the last laugh, however, as his Pirates scor...
Closed Captioning Transcriber Did Brad Guzan Dirty
Have something you think we should know? Email us at [email protected], or contact our writers directly, or use our SecureDrop system. You can also follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook....
Movies About Male Strippers, Ranked
If there’s one thing that makes me sad for heterosexual men, it’s that so many of them haven’t seen Magic Mike. They assumed they’d be in for nonstop tight close-ups of Spandex-packaged junk, exposure to unrealistically chiseled and waxed male bodies, and barely plotted sexploitation aimed at the ga...
Video: BYU Football Recruit Shot In Arm Outside School
Police say BYU football recruit Charles West was shot in the arm outside of a Texas middle school Sunday night. Via D Magazine, video of the shooting has surfaced on YouTube, showing West running away as the shooter fires six shots....
Ronaldo Shills Bullshit Workout Contraption In Ridiculous Commercial
I’m not saying Cristiano Ronaldo is a cyborg, and if he is he’s probably a benevolent one, but if this wild commercial for some weird, obviously scammy Japanese “exercise gear” isn’t really a behind-the-scenes look at Ronaldo’s morning boot-up process, I’ll buy this stuff and have a six pack in no t...
Grierson & Leitch's Best Movies Of 2015 (Well, So Far)
As of last week, we are halfway through 2015. As usual, most of the year’s “prestige” movies aren’t out yet, but that doesn’t mean that the past six months didn’t have some terrific films. To make sure they aren’t forgotten come year-end-list time, Grierson & Leitch today present our favorite movies...
David Price Says Seattle's Bullpen Mound Is Dangerous
Yesterday was a throw day for David Price, and with the Tigers on the road in Seattle he used the visiting bullpen at Safeco Field. He wasn’t a fan:...
Ronaldo Returns Lost Phone, Treats Owner And Her Friends To A Night Out
Cristiano Ronaldo is famous for his many, many goals and the selfish way he goes about scoring them. However, the forward is apparently more than willing to lend a helping hand to a random stranger in Las Vegas, finding a woman’s phone, returning it to her, and taking her and her friends on a night ...
"OMFG!": How Dale Jr. Reacted Live To Last Night's Gnarly NASCAR Wreck
Dale Earnhardt Jr. won last night’s Coke Zero 400 at Daytona, but most coverage of the race today has rightly focused on the devastating wreck that pulverized the #3 Chevy, yet miraculously left driver Austin Dillon unharmed. Here’s uncensored audio of Dale Jr.’s raw reaction to seeing the wreck in ...
U.S. Steeplechase Runner Evan Jager Eats It, Triumphs
On the Fourth of July in Paris, Evan Jager did something perfect. The 26-year-old American lined up for a 3,000-meter steeplechase against nearly all of the best steeplers in the world, and over the first five minutes of the race, he joined Kenyan stud Jairus Birech in running away from the entire f...
People Who Hate Air Conditioning Are Commie Assholes
It’s summer again, which means it’s time for a whole new round of dirty hippie assholes smarming up the Internet with their anti-air conditioning takes. Even the Pope got in on it. NOT COOL, COOL POPE. Anyway, these air conditioning shamers are a scourge and they must be destroyed, starting with the...
Let's Explore The Corrupt Town That Inspired <i>True Detective </i>
How are you enjoying #TrueDetectiveSeason2 so far? It’s okay, right? I don’t know, maybe it kind of sucks. Anyway, if you’re like me, you’ve spent a good chunk of the first three episodes being a little confused by the city-corruption storyline. We’ve been told that there are a lot of “deals being d...
Rapper Secretly Uses Apple Store As A Recording Studio
It’s not that hard to fight the man! As long as you live in a city with an easily accessible Apple Store or two. Just ask Prince Harvey, a New York City rapper who recently recorded an entire new album for free on display computers in the SoHo Apple Store. ...
Nick Kyrgios Had A Meltdown At Wimbledon
After receiving a warning about swearing in the second set of his fourth-round match at Wimbledon, Nick Kyrgios stopped caring....
Rory McIlroy Injures Ankle Playing Soccer, British Open In Doubt
2014 Open champ Rory McIlroy may not be around to defend his title, after rupturing a ligament in his left ankle playing soccer this weekend....
Carlos Gomez Is A Good Buddy Who Will Leave You Some Gum
Sometimes I forget how much I enjoy Carlos Gomez, who is always down to start some shit on the field or give a hilarious quote off of it, and then he goes and does something like this:...