ti Page 1542 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jerry Buss, Surrounded By Boobs: A Tribute To The Greatest NBA Owner Ever
Jerry Buss died today. The 80-year-old was arguably the greatest NBA owner in the history of the league. He was also a world-class Playmate aficionado who frequently dated teenage girls and used to host his birthday party at a brothel. To put it in more appropriate obituary terms, the man was "known...
South Florida Gives Punter Special Teams Award Riddled With Spelling Errors, Including Punter's Last Name
Nawt shore wut tha prawblem iz hear. Justin Brockhaus-Kann wuz A fif-yeer seenyer hoo post'd A carear-bestt avridge uv 40.6 yardds perr puntt inn 2012 four thah Sauth Floreda Bullz. T'wuz a ruff yeer four tha Bullz, butt the universitee didd write buy Brockhaus-Kann buy prezenting himm wit ann aword...
Tim Lincecum Had A Very Zen Offseason
Now that spring training has officially kicked off, it's time for baseball writers to spend the next two months filling column space while absolutely nothing of consequence happens. Fox Sports' Ken Rosenthal got started today, asking various members of the San Francisco Giants to share their favori...
A Text Message From A South African Rugby Player May Be At The Center Of The Pistorius Shooting
Over the weekend, we learned of a South African rugby player, Francois Hougaard, who may or may not have once dated the woman Oscar Pistorius shot and killed, Reeva Steenkamp. According to one report, Pistorius and Steenkamp were fighting over a text message from Hougaard early Thursday morning, sho...
Tiger Woods And President Obama Play Golf Together, Constitute Nightmare Scenario For Old White Dudes
On the list of Old White Dudes' nightmares, the President of the United States and arguably the best golf player ever both being black, spending too much time on vacation and leisurely playing a round of golf at an exclusive club, betrayed by one of their own, has got to just be the worst, right?...
Reports: A Bloodied Cricket Bat Was Found At Oscar Pistorius's Home And Reeva Steenkamp's Skull Was "Crushed"
South Africa's City Press is reporting that a bloodied cricket bat was found in Pistorius's home and that it may have been used against his girlfriend of four months, Reeva Steenkamp. Police are investigating several different scenarios involving the bat, including whether it was used against Steen...
Basketball Players Spent Their Wild And Crazy All-Star Saturday Meeting For Three And A Half Hours And Voting To Dismiss Their Union Director
Wojnarowski reports that Billy Hunter's dismissal, widely presumed to be an inevitability after the myriad scandals that recently punctured his cocoon of power, was voted on and affirmed by a group of NBA players this afternoon. A bit more on the meeting that sealed his fate once and for all:...
How Clark Olson Beats Everyone Else In Fantasy Everything
The guy who just beat everyone else in America at all the fantasy sports, again, is a computer science professor who is not so much into trades but who is really, really into spreadsheets. Clark Olson, the 2012 winner of ESPN's omnibus Uber Challenge fantasy game, again, tallied the high score acros...
Report: Oscar Pistorius Attempted To Revive Reeva Steenkamp, Who Was Sitting On The Bathroom Sink When Shot
South African newspaper Beeld has contacted sources close to the police investigation of Oscar Pistorius's shooting of Reeva Steenkamp and filled in a few details about that morning: First, police believe that Steenkamp was sitting "on the lavatory"—bathroom sink—when Pistorius shot her through the...
Lindsey Vonn's Busted Knee Looks Like Hell
U.S. skier Lindsey Vonn tore the ACL and MCL in her right knee in a brutal crash at the World Championships in Austria last week. Here's how it looks today....
You Know Spring Training Is Here When You Read Sentences Like "Denard Span Said He Started Screaming And Making Noises To Discourage The Bird"
There is no baseball, no real, meaningful baseball for another 44 days. But the dead zone of the sports calendar has quickened considerably by the advent of spring training. Camps in Arizona and Florida stir to life, as co-workers who haven't seen each other since September get back together for som...
Did The Movie <em>Heathers</em> Kill The Name Heather?
Welcome to Dataspin, a new weekly data visualization of whatever the fuck....
The Coming War: A Military Doctor's Field Guide To Masturbating In Afghanistan
The past decade of combat operations in Iraq and Afghanistan has given military physicians such as myself the important opportunity to gather unprecedented data on some of our most pressing medical issues. This data set has spurred advances in the care of trauma, hemorrhagic shock, traumatic brain i...
Here's A Video Of Dogs Saying "I Love You"
Originally published Feb. 14, 2011....
Jim Boeheim Is Mad At Andy Katz Because Jim Boeheim Is An Officious Turd
Last night, Syracuse coach Jim Boeheim took time out of his post-game press conference to take a shot at ESPN's Andy Katz. "I'll answer anybody's question but yours," Boeheim said, "because you're an idiot and really a disloyal person."...
Stranded Carnival Cruise Ship's Toilets Are So Full Of Shit They Are Falling Off The Walls, And Other Gross Details From Someone Aboard
Jayme Lamm—freelance sportswriter and proprietor of TheBlondeSide.com—is currently stranded aboard the Carnival Triumph, a cruise ship that has been without power for four days after an engine room fire. We've received sporadic dispatches from her over the past few days via text message, and she's ...
Will Eating Decades-Old Athlete Candy Bars Kill You? A Taste Test
"You're not going to eat it, are you?" the eBay seller asked, after we had completed our purchase. "People have been asking me if they can eat it, and that's probably not a good idea."...
This TV News Anchor Just Keeps Doing An Inadvertent Blowjob Pantomime
Global Saskatoon proudly trumpets the program hosted by anchor Lisa Dutton and weather specialist Kevin Stanfield as "Saskatoon's #1 Morning Newscast." This video is just a taste, but it does demonstrate the show's enthusiasm for having its hands wrapped around some of the hardest news in Canada....
This Move By Rockets Rookie Donatas Motiejunas Belongs In An AND1 Mixtape
OK, so he probably didn't do this on purpose, but we still can't help but be impressed by Motiejunas's deployment of the old throw-the-ball-off-some-poor-sap's-shoulder move during last night's Rockets-Clippers game. Blinded by the brilliance of the trick, the Clippers' defenders could do nothing ...
Basketball Legend John Salley Is Here Right Now To Answer Your Questions
Most of you probably know John Salley from his 2009 breakout performance in Confessions of a Shopaholic. But — as it turns out — John is actually a really famous, and incredibly accomplished basketball superstar. "Four championship rings, with three different teams, in three different decades and t...