ti Page 1676 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
This Week In Unintentional Dong Submissions
Writes tipster Jessica, "I'm sure this is already on your radar because I saw it on Gawker. Seriously, what is that kid holding? It looks like a penis-y double-headed snake. Gross."...
Júlio Baptista's Overhead-Kick Goal In Injury Time Was A Thing Of Beauty
Malaga moved atop La Liga standings yesterday with a 3-2 victory over Getafe. The winning goal came in penalty time. Big deal for the whole side and for Júlio Baptista, the Brazilian who has played for Real Madrid, Arsenal and Roma....
Your ALDS Open Thread
Tampa Bay and Texas start their Game 2 at 7:07 p.m. Rays are up a road game....
Listen To The Longest Soccer Goal Call Without A Pause Ever
Your morning roundup for Oct. 1, the day the nanny state says you're no longer allowed to legally fornicate with animals in Florida. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
The Undervaluing Of <em>Moneyball</em>; Or, What You Can Learn By Watching With A Bunch Of Old People
Although advanced baseball analysis had been around for years, Michael Lewis's 2003 book Moneyball, about the Oakland A's General Manager Billy Beane's using it to build their roster, helped to start an online industry of carping about player evaluation and team structure. The release of the 2011 fi...
Hey, Baseball, You Should Be Terrified Of The Tigers Bullpen
Terror, terror! Everybody's made a big stink about how terrifying Detroit's ace, Justin Verlander, is. We, of course, agree: nine strikeouts, two walks, and six hits per nine is plenty terrifying. And everyone's made a similar stink about how un-terrifying Detroit's other starters—Doug Fister, Max S...
Terry Francona Out As Manager Of Red Sox, Who Promised "No Scapegoats," To Be Replaced By (INSERT HIGH-PROFILE MANAGER HERE)
You already know the story of the Red Sox's epic collapse—an eight-and-a-half-game wild card lead, blown to bits, that 99.6 percent chance of making the playoffs, turned to zero. Now, according to pretty much every national baseball writer (Fox Sports' Ken Rosenthal had it first last night), the Red...
The "Play Tebow!!" Billboard Is Live In Denver
The "Play Tebow" billboard is now up on I-25 and 58th Avenue in Denver, and it is comically simple. It is a digital thing, which is fancy, but otherwise it appears to have been devised by a middle school yearbook committee....
This Is One Of Those Soccer-Fan Celebrations Best Seen In Slow Motion
This video comes from yesterday's UEFA Champions League match between Chelsea and Valencia. Specifically, it's in the 87th minute after Valencia's Roberto Soldado scored on a penalty kick after Chelsea's Salomon Kalou went "up with his arm to dink it away from a Valencia head. What idiocy. What ne...
JV Football Coach Suspended For Making Players Lie On Graves To Learn About Persistence And Rebirth
"The sources said [coach Jim] Marsh, also an English teacher at the high school, ordered the team bus to pull over near the cemetery. He then asked the roughly two dozen players to get out and lay on the graves. The players rested there for several minutes while Marsh preached about the importance ...
Last Night's Rays/Red Sox Madness, In Chart Form
Jack Moore acknowledges right from the start that it's impossible to quantify what took place in Baltimore and St. Pete. But he did calculate how the odds for both Boston and Tampa Bay fluctuated throughout the evening, and that snazzy image he created certainly puts it all in perspective. [FanGrap...
The Best Four Minutes Of Baseball Last Night, Presented In Split Screen
We've put together a split-screen video syncing up the conclusions of both Yankees-Rays and Red Sox-Orioles that we hope the IP crew at MLB is too hungover today to notice. Enjoy....
Why It's OK To Hate Ron Jaworski And Jon Gruden
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Buy Drew's new book, The Postmortal, through here. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
Jose Reyes Is A Selfish, Gutless, Stat-Padding Quitter (Just Like Derek Jeter)
From the moment Jose Reyes dropped a first-inning bunt single and then checked out of the season's final game, leaving his average at .337 and all but assuring the Mets of the first batting title in franchise history, it was obvious that people who need something to yell about were going to yell abo...
Dan Uggla Celebrated His Home Run Last Night By Dong-Bumping David Ross (Video)
Uggla had just hit a two-run homer off Cole Hamels in the bottom of the third to put the Braves ahead, 3-1. There was a playoff spot riding on this game, of course, so there was reason to be excited. But ... what was that?...
Let's Watch A Dutch Guy Scare The Living Hell Out Of A Chinese Guy On The Subway
This video's called "Chinese vs Brawl Dutch (FIGHT)." Though it's difficult to understand what, exactly, is being said and disappointing how, exactly, they back away from the brink without resorting to violence, it's oddly mesmerizing to see Chinese get in the wrong Brawl Dutch's face....
Swedish Golf Course Hires Hunter To Shoot Two Fairway-Ruining Piglets Dead
"Last night the foraging fun had run its course for two of the eight piglets when they were shot dead by a hunter on the approach to the fifth hole. The whole thing 'took fifteen minutes' according to Ottoson, and it is hoped it will be enough to avoid any more from having to be shot. 'We couldn't...
A Very Quick Correction To A Very Dumb Rick Reilly Column
Rick Reilly writes: "Jersey Rule No. 3: You may not wear a jersey if somebody else in your group is already wearing one. This is also known as The Fedora Rule. No two guys in any group can be wearing a fedora. The second man's fedora must be trashed, crushed or sold. You never saw Sinatra and Dean M...
Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: The End Is The Beginning
It was a frightful beating that gave rise to Deadspin's ongoing search for the meaning of Bartolo Colon—the 38-year-old Yankees starter got knocked out of the first inning against the Blue Jays, surrendering 8 runs (3 earned), an outing so bad it raised questions about the pitcher's very purpose in ...
Watch Bemused Florida Coach Will Muschamp Ask An Analogically Clumsy Reporter "What's A Padawan?"
In journalism school, as far as I know, they don't teach you to begin your SEC press conference questions with "Excuse the Star Wars reference, but..." You're supposed to inquire along the lines of "How do you stop that guy, coach," and "Would you like to score more points in the second half?" Ala...