ti Page 1733 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Today In Unfortunately Named Minor League Baseball Teams: The Sugar Land Skeeters
"The team will be known as the Skeeters, which celebrates the hometown love of warm Texas nights and an itch for baseball." They left out "one who ejaculates all over the place." God help that poor mascot. [ABCHouston]...

Cam Newton Ruled Eligible By NCAA
The NCAA has reinstated Newton, after he was secretly declared ineligible yesterday (for procedural purposes after an amateurism violation was determined to have occurred). [NCAA, Birmingham News]...

SHOTY Semifinals: No. 1 Brett Favre Vs. No. 4 Jay Mariotti
We've reached the SHOTY Semifinals. Brett Favre left Ines Sainz in arrears, and Jay Mariotti oozed Jason Whitlock's pumpkin. Now, for the nitty-gritty....

Surprisingly Congruous When You Think About It Mixtape Theater: Barry Sanders
Welcome to Surprisingly Congruous When You Think About It Mixtape Theater. Today's entry: Lions great Barry Sanders set to Clint Mansell & The Kronos Quartet's overture from the Requiem For A Dream soundtrack....

In Which We Veer Toward Animal Cruelty In Our Inaugural Lobster Roof Race
We received a LobsterGram, it's less delicious than a candygram, but it's more fun because it comes with live lobsters. We didn't know what to do with them (before cooking them) so we raced them on the Gawker HQ roof deck. Watch....

"Dude Getting Blown By A Dog" Gets Surprising Odds In 2010 SHOTY Awards
Bodog.com summoned one of its bookmakers to analyze the favorites for this year's ridiculous little Sports Human of the Year competition. They are listed after the jump. This for entertainment purposes only. I think....

SHOTY Quarterfinals: No. 3 Karen F. Owen vs. No. 6 Dude Getting Blown By Dog
Oh, if only the dog of Joel Monaghan's Canberra Raiders teammate had somehow made it into Duke. In the interests of research, anyway ......

Heat Strokes, Games 15-18: The Meaning Of The Bump
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

Happy Belated Birthday Vin Scully, Here's A Great Moment In Live-TV Parachuting History
During that famous Game 6 of the '86 World Series, a Mets fan parachuted onto the field with a "Go Mets" sign and a whole lotta balls. That Vin Scully—who celebrated his 83rd birthday yesterday—made a perfect call is gravy....

Why Is Danny Ainge Dicking Around On His Phone When He Should Be Working?
Last Wednesday, UConn and Kentucky faced off in the Maui Invitational Final. Kemba Walker had blown the tournament up in the previous games and saw his NBA Draft stock rising, so why was Celtics GM Danny Ainge so bored with the proceedings?...

Andre Johnson And Cortland Finnegan Get Wrist Slaps For Punches
Johnson and Finnegan were each fined $25,000 but not suspended for their fistfight yesterday. They can thank the Richard Seymour precedent of "slugging guys who probably deserve it." [NFL.com]...

Go Listen To Leitch And The FreeDarko Guys Stammer At Each Other Tomorrow
New Yorkers: Leitch is moderating a discussion with the FreeDarko authors from 7-8 p.m. tomorrow at the Strand. Drinks to follow. [NYMag.com, art by Jacob Weinstein via the FreeDarko store]...

SHOTY Quarterfinals: No. 4 Jay Mariotti vs. No. 5 Jason Whitlock
It's the media subregional! It is worth noting that the only two media folk to make the SHOTY final eight are both former ESPN employees. Well, then, the decks must be swabbed shiny clean over there then....

In Case You Missed the Beat Down
Why in the name of NBA JAM shouldn't Deadspin EIC A.J. Daulerio and contributing editor Drew Magary fly to LA to play 2-on-2 with ex-NBA power forward John Salley (aka Spider) and the short but court-prowess possessing Kevin Hench (the Henchman)?...

Weekend Winner: The Big East, College Sports' Honest Harlot
TCU, a school approximately 400 miles west of the Mississippi, will soon play sports in a conference called the Big East, FanHouse informs. You have to admire the Big East. It never fails to be the hardest-working lapdancer in the room....

Before The Storm, After The Sunshine Band: The Prelude To Disco Demolition Night
Our attention was brought to this collection of 35 rare photos taken prior to a Tigers/White Sox game on July 12, 1979. Not hours later, Comiskey Park would play host to the figurative end of the 70s, and the closest thing to a riot at an American sporting event since....

Russell Westbrook Posterizes Shane Battier With Vicious Slam
Midway through last night's Thunder-Rockets game, Kevin Durant swung the ball out to Russell Westbrook who drove straight to the hoop and elevated for a dunk that straight embarrassed alleged defensive maestro Shane Battier....

University of Maryland Starts First Competitive Eating Team
"Feed the turtle" is the motto of Maryland's competitive eating club, which gained university recognition last week. We're just shocked it wasn't a Big Ten school....

Yeah, This Is The Best Interception We've Ever Seen
While most of the country was being treated to a meaningless Notre Dame-USC game, Oklahoma and Oklahoma State had themselves a barn burner. Unseen by most of the country? This gem: a tag-team interception by State's Broderick Brown and Shaun Lewis....

Here's A Spirited Defense Of "Colored" Tiger Woods Which Condemns Brett Favre, SI, Dumb Parents And America
Words beyond "offended but strangely mesmerized" escape me after reading this email that came in at 12:31 a.m. yesterday. Spent a day and a half debating whether I should even post it. You decide whether I made the right call....