ti Page 1739 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Football Beat The World Series In The Ratings. Huh.
As Deadspin's resident crazy old coot railing against things not being like they were back when I was a lad, I've been asked to comment on a regular season NFL game beating a World Series game for the first time ever....

Zach Galifianakis Will Probably Smoke Even More Pot On TV If California Legalizes It
On Friday's Real Time, Out Cold funnyman Zach Galifianakis smoked a joint during a panel discussion of California's Proposition 19 ballot initiative. In related news, Fox News's Margaret Hoover probably listens to a lot of Miles Davis on her days off....

If You’re Not Rich In America, You Are Fucked
There's an election coming up tomorrow, and I haven't paid any attention to it because, at this point, whatever asshole they stick in office will be no different from the asshole they stuck in there before....

"Thriller" On Ice Much Better Than "Thriller" In Filipino Prison
You know, agility-wise. We're not sure why someone would perform the "Thriller" dance on the ice, but when you think about it, why wouldn't you perform the "Thriller" dance on ice? [Puck Daddy]...

Tottenham’s Benoit Assou-Ekotto Rips Into "Dirty Prostitute Shagger" Rooney
Tottenham Hotspur defender Benoit Assou-Ekotto, best known for his laid-back, "couldn't give a f**k, tbh" approach to professional football, has laid into his Premier League peers, singling Wayne Rooney out for special attention as a "dirty prostitute shagger."...

Somebody Is Desperately Seeking Tim Tebow's Poo
Tim Tebow's pro team had a game across the Atlantic today, so I have no idea why the president of a portable-shitter company is talking about rooting around for Tebow dung. But Scott Taylor of Advanced Sanitation is....

Texas H.S. Football Team Loses 12-OT Game
With a playoff berth on the line, the Nacogdoches Dragons and Jacksonville Indians were tied at 28 at the end of regulation Friday night. Final score: 84-81....

Did Concussion Earlier In The Month Lead To A High-School Football Player's Death?
A Kansas City-area high school football player died on the field Thursday night; Ron Stiles said his son Nathan "suffered a concussion in the school's homecoming game earlier this month ... he had been cleared to play Thursday."...

"Celtic" Delonte West Gets Into A Locker-Room Fight With Von "Who?" Wafer
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

More Stories About Terrifying Hydraulic Lifts From Football Videographers
Earlier, we brought you Anonymous's account of videotaping football practice from a scissor lift under circumstances similar to those that precipitated Declan Sullivan's death. Readers sent in their own experiences with the perils of videotaping from lifts....

The Day I Thought I'd Die On A Scissor Lift: What It's Like To Do The Job That Killed Declan Sullivan
Notre Dame would like you to believe that the death of Declan Sullivan Wednesday was a tragic accident but an isolated one, a sad case of bad weather conspiring with terrible misfortune. And that would be wrong....

This Is What Four Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Do In The Bathroom Together
Years of standup-comic banter has been deemed irrelevant now that we have seen what happens when women go to the bathroom together. (Yeah, I don't know what's going on here, either. It has something to do with Roto-Rooter.) [CNET]...

Cristiano Ronaldo’s New Nike Mercurial Vapours Look Awful
Stylish young man Cristiano Ronaldo proudly unveiled his horrific new safari-print football boots yesterday (click the pic for a closer look.)...

Peeper Videos Of Kevin Durant Are A Dumb Viral Something Or Other For Nike
Here's a peeping Tom-style video, supposedly shot by this kid, in which Kevin Durant supposedly moves into what's supposedly his new house. It's an ad for Nike. Because that's all anything ever is anymore....

Heat Strokes, Game 2: Moon Over Miami
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

A Brief History Of <em>FIFA</em> And <em>Pro Evolution</em> Soccer
Following on from the unnecessary video game references in yesterday's posts, The Spoiler thought this was too good to be hidden away in the link dump....

How A Notre Dame Student Died, And Why He Shouldn't Have
At precisely 4:50 pm, a 50-foot scissor lift tower collapsed in winds exceeding 50 mph, killing the 20-year-old student filming football practice for the team. It shouldn't have come to that....

For Those Of You Who Still Don't Think Pat Burrell Is The Gimp-Costumed "Machine"
Here's more proof: The Fightins got their hands on an old photo of Pat The Bat dressed in the gimp outfit seen in Brian Wilson's odd video. The story behind Burrell's get-up is predictably strange. Go read it. [The Fightins]...

Uribe's Homer Helps Lead Giants To Game One Victory, California Smokers To Free Doobies
A medical marijuana dispensary in San Francisco is offering patients free joints every time a Giant hits a home run in the World Series. Commendably, Tim Lincecum was still in the dugout immediately following Juan Uribe's fifth-inning blast....

Heat Strokes, Game 1: Should This Diary Be What You Want It To Be?
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....