ti Page 1832 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

An Intern Introduction And A Poop-Related Apology
Hello. If you haven't heard, I'm the new Deadspintern (feel free to suggest a nickname). I hope you have enjoyed what I've done so far because it's been a real hoot....

Time To Start A Band Since We've Already Got A Kickass Album Cover
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Tiger's Caddy Wishes He Had Gone For The Cockblock
Steve Williams says that had he known about Woods's affairs, he would have made them public. Really, Steve? What the hell?...

Marvin Miller Remembers The Pre-Crazy Jim Bunning, Labor Revolutionary
"Heh," Marvin Miller chuckles. "I haven't talked to Jim for a long while." Jim is Jim Bunning, the obstreperous shitbag who sought to deny thousands of Americans their jobless benefits but who, once upon a time, fought baseball's good fight....

Beat Writer Continues Nationals Coverage, Sans Newspaper
Just because the Washington Times fired their entire sports section, Mark Zuckerman isn't going to stop doing his job. For someone to cover the Nationals voluntarily, I'm not sure it's going too far to call him a modern day Jesus....

Canada <em>Still</em> Hung Up On That Hockey Game, Apparently
A video package of Canadian Olympic highlights, culminating in Sidney Crosby's goal, played during the Star-Spangled Banner at last night's Sens-Rangers game. Ottawa says it was a malfunction and apologized, but we've gone to war over less. [NY Post]...

Great Caption Fail, Or Greatest Caption Fail?
The Times again shows their conservative bias by mislabeling a photo that's definitely not Hillary Clinton. And probably not Michelle Bachelet, either....

Rich Eisen's 40-Yard Dash An Amusing Special-Effects Bonanza
When he isn't impersonating Howard Cosell, Rich Eisen is straight running things on the NFL Network. Things like the 40-yard dash, which Rich ran in a slight-breeze-inducing 6.25 seconds....

Poll: 100% Of Tiger Woods Pollsters Hate Their Lives
An ABCNews/ESPN poll found that 54% of (1,000) Americans believe that Tiger Woods was sincere when he gave his sex apology, but only 5% of those people could believe that someone is actually conducting polling about Tiger Woods. [pic]...

Clippers Add To Their Distinguished Record Of Racial Sensitivity
I have no idea what's going on in this press release, except that the Steven Esparza in question is a media services assistant with the team, and that the Clippers are an abomination of a franchise. [NBA.com, via @HoopsHype]...

There's A Reason They Go South For Spring Training
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Strasburg Will Start The Season In The Minors For Reasons That Have Nothing At All To Do With Money, No Sir
It seems more and more likely that Stephen Strasburg will spend his April riding buses around the Carolina League, and this of course has everything to do with "his seasoning" and nothing whatsoever to do with saving money. Right....

Jim Bunning Gives Reporter The Finger
It's easy to forget that Sen. Bunning, who enjoys watching the unemployed starve and freeze to death for sport, was a Hall of Fame pitcher. Maybe that's where he learned to deal so maturely with the media. [ABC News]...

Tim Tebow At The Combine: A Revelation, Set To Iron Maiden
As you know, Tebow impressed at the NFL Scouting Combine, running the three-cone drill in a hell-blazing 6.66 seconds. (It's the second coming! Of Mike Alstott!) Here's video of Tebow's big day, set to Iron Maiden's "Number of the Beast."...

Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch: Antichrist Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence - quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose - that the Florida quarterback is the Beast....

Three Questions About The NFL's New Overtime System
So the league appears to finally be changing the overtime rules. At first glance, the proposal is much better than the old sudden death. But then we got to wondering....

Al Jefferson Busted For DWI, Maybe Definitely
Certainly, some Al Jefferson with the same birthday as the Wolves center got pulled over and charged with a DWI last night. If Rand says it's so, then it's so. [Hennepin County Sheriff]...

Sports Fella Leaves The Yard
OK, what in the name of Ho Chi Minh is Bill Simmons talking about here? Muhammad Ali and 'Nam? Tiger keeping his pecker out of the killing fields of Spearmint Rhino? What?...

Alright, This Evgeni Plushenko Video Is Kind Of Outstanding
Especially if you like Metallica and silver dragons and lightning and fucking fire. Enjoy this 45 seconds of battle-axing brilliance. (Thanks to reader Tony, for the tip.)...

The One Where The South Korean Speedskate Lady Grabs Her Coach's Crotch
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....