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Rape Jokes Everywhere: Your <em>College GameDay</em> Sign Roundup
ESPN security has given up....

Sunderland Defender's Exquisite Volley Makes For Wonderful Own Goal
Above, Sunderland's Santiago Vergini shows off some impressive technical ability as he takes a bouncing ball and cracks it past the keeper. It would've been worthy of his personal highlight reel, if it hadn't been aimed at his own net. But for an own goal, this was a beaut....

Suns Owner Robert Sarver Calls Out Spurs For Phoning In Preseason Game
The Spurs' starting five for last night's game against the Suns was a bit underwhelming: Matt Bonner, Aron Baynes, Tony Parker, Danny Green, and Kyle Anderson. Tim Duncan, Tiago Splitter, Manu Ginobili, Kawhi Leonard, and Patty Mills all sat out. Gregg Popovich didn't even show up to coach. (Hey, it...

Ill-Timed Bench Collapse Makes For Great Soccer Team Photo
This is what happened when Derry City, a professional soccer team from the League of Ireland Premier Division, tried to get together to snap a team photo. Everyone seems to be having a good laugh at the situation, except for that dude on the bottom left. He might be dead....

They'll Love Tom Brady In La Liga
You are now imagining Tom Brady holding his face and rolling around on the ground....

Report: Tom Brady Coulda Been A Jet
From the Daily News' Gary Myers comes an alternate history worthy of Harry Turtledove: A source who was in New York's draft room in 2000 claims one scout aggressively urged Bill Parcells to select Tom Brady with the Jets' sixth-round draft pick....

Amar'e Stoudemire Bathes In Red Wine, For Some Damn Reason
This morning, Knicks forward Amar'e Stoudemire posted a photo of himself bathing in red wine on his Instagram page. At the time, I honestly did not believe he was actually bathing in red wine, because why would a person do that? I was wrong. Amar'e Stoudemire bathes in wine all the damn time....

How Deadspin Fucked Up The Cory Gardner Story
On Wednesday, Deadspin published a story questioning the football bona fides of U.S. Rep. Cory Gardner, a Republican who's running for the Colorado Senate seat currently occupied by Democrat Mark Udall. We fucked up. After the story was published, the main source we'd relied on reversed himself on...

Michael Keaton Forever: <em>Birdman</em>, Reviewed
Birdman doesn't have any right being as fantastic as it is. Structured around a gimmick—the whole movie is meant to look like one continuous shot—and featuring a potentially eye-rolling plot device (a has-been actor's personal and professional life comes crashing down on him in the days before...
![Rock 'n' Roll Marathon Sued For Exploiting Volunteers [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/avojo4qoppgtwdptdw00.jpg)
Rock 'n' Roll Marathon Sued For Exploiting Volunteers [Update]
Competitor Group, Inc., which owns the nationwide Rock 'n' Roll Marathon and Half Marathon series, has had a class-action suit brought against it for an alleged violation of federal and state labor practices. The plaintiff claims she and others across the country volunteered because they thought CGI...

Stone Cold Steve Austin Helps Randy Orton RKO More Of The Internet
Yesterday, we all appreciated the meme that is Randy Orton RKOing people on the internet. It's still happening, and—BY GAWD, THAT'S STONE COLD'S MUSIC....

How To Store Glassware: A Celebration Of Strong-Ass Opinions
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here periodically to answer your filthiest questions....

Derek Roy Makes Miraculous Goal Line Clearance
Flames forward Devin Setoguchi had to have thought, if only for a split second, that he scored. Ninety-five percent of the puck crossed the goal line on his shot, but before that final five percent could, Predators center Derek Roy backhanded it away. This is why we have goal line technology....

Randy Orton Is RKOing The Entire Internet
Whoever had the idea to insert WWE wrestler Randy Orton into internet clips of random people eating it, thank you. You deserve an award....


Danny Briere Nets Game-Winner With 0.5 Seconds Left
It's early, but Colorado Avalanche center Danny Briere has already given us one of the craziest highlights of the year, swatting home a game-winning goal against the Bruins today with just milliseconds remaining on the clock. ...

Kicker Lives The Dream, Scores Touchdown On Own Kickoff
This is William Will, the emphatically named kicker for Dayton, swooping in to recover a fumble and take it to the house for (we are going out on a giant limb here) his first career touchdown. He was named the FCS Pioneer League's special teams player of the week, because come the fuck on....

No, That Eagles Employee Wasn't Celebrating Victor Cruz's Injury
Up there is the front page of today's New York Daily News: a guy in an Eagles polo seemingly gloating over a crumpled, injured Victor Cruz on the ground. "PHILTHY," indeed. Of course, the photo captures only one frame. What do moving pictures show?...

Terrance Williams's Catch Was Great, But Tony Romo's Throw Was Better
The best and most important play on Sunday was Tony Romo's hookup with Terrance Williams on a third-and-20, keeping alive a fourth-quarter drive that would end in the Cowboys' go-ahead touchdown against the Seahawks. There had been 55 third-and-at-least-20s to that point in the season, according to ...